


All This Time

by thejilyship



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, jily - Fandom
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Muggle, Alternate Universe - Neighbors, Childhood Friends, Childhood Rivals, Enemies to Friends to Lovers, F/M, Friends to Lovers, Girl next door, Minor Marlene McKinnon/Dorcas Meadowes, childhood neighbors, idiots to lovers, jily, mary macdonald/reginald cattermole - Freeform, post uni, sirius black/benjy fenwick - Freeform, slowburn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-27
Updated: 2021-03-07
Packaged: 2021-03-10 20:01:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 55,703
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28362840
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/thejilyship/pseuds/thejilyship
Summary: James and Lily grew up next door to one another. Their bedroom windows giving them glimpses into the others life, and also offering prime opportunities to argue with each other over every little thing. They never figured out how to be friends when they were kids, but now that they've graduated from college and are home for the summer, they have a second chance to get things right.
Relationships: James Potter/Lily Evans Potter
Comments: 354
Kudos: 286
Collections: James and Lily Fanfics





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm actually a little nervous to post this, because I've been working on it for so long. I started this story last summer I think? And now I have about two or three chapters left to write, so I figured it's time to start posting. I'm also very excited for you all to read this, because I really like it and I have been wanting to share it for a long time!  
> I really hope you enjoy it!

Lily hadn’t expected to pack up her things and move back home after she graduated from university.

She thought for sure she would be a part of the group of people who had all their shit together, all their ducks in a row, all the job offers rolling in even before their diploma was in hand.

She’d get a fancy grown up job and never have to worry about waiting tables or fitting into her childhood bed again.

But she didn’t fall into that group of people. Despite always being one of the ‘smart kids’ growing up, being put in advanced classes, acing all her college courses, taking the right internships, and spending her last year in school networking, she graduated feeling below average. Her lease ended, and she hadn’t secured a job, so it was back home to Cokeworth.

And when she sat down on her childhood bed, in a room that was the same bright shade of yellow it had been when she’d picked it out at age eight, staring a poster of NSYNC, she felt a bit like a failure.

Her mum was nothing but supportive of course.

Her sister was a complete nightmare, of course.

And she didn’t know what to do with herself.

She looked over and saw the tower of boxes in front of her closet, and the other tower of boxes by her bookshelf. She sighed and stood up, pausing to open the window before throwing her hair in a quick plait and getting to work.

There was no need to pretend that this was going to be a short kind of temporary, so she might as well get comfortable.

She turned on some music that matched the nostalgia in the air, and then started emptying one of the boxes into her dresser drawer.

It wasn’t long until she was singing along to a Spice Girls’ song, her hair now being held up by a scrunchy she had found wrapped around her bedpost, and her lips were a bright red from an old lipstick that had been tucked away in her sock drawer. The boxes, momentarily forgotten and she attempted to hit a high note.

“Evans?” Lily froze, mid-dance move, her hand still balled into a fist and in the air. She knew that voice. She hadn’t heard that voice in a very long time, but she knew that voice.

That was the voice of James Potter. The neighbor boy who had grown up on the other side of her bedroom window. A boy who seemed completely perfect to the world.

He had always been a bit of a rival for her while they were growing up, even when they were friends, and they had not been friends for long unless you added up all the times in between when they were not friends and counted when they were young children. But even when they were friends, they had competed for the higher test scores and the most impressive essays.

James had good looks, good grades, rich parents, a loyal group of friends, and last Lily heard, his dream job.

He was the very last person that she wanted to talk to right now.

She turned around to face the window and sighed. “Potter,” She called back as she took a few steps closer to the window. She’d already humiliated herself, so there was no need to pretend that she didn’t currently look as though she belonged in a nineties hair band. “What are you doing here? Last I heard, you’d been signed to the league of your choosing.”

He had one of his elbows leaning against the frame of the window and he was smiling, one of those slightly crooked smiles that had caused all the girls in her year to blush when they found out that her bedroom window was directly across from his. It was the kind of smile that had made Lily blush whenever James had deigned to aim it in her direction.

But that was a long time ago and she wasn’t blushing now.

“The league of my choice, eh? That sounds mighty impressive, but that’s also not how it works.” Two sentences in and he was already correcting her about something that she’d meant to be a joke.

“I know that.” She said, pulling the scrunchy out of her hair and leaning out the window herself. “I guess I’m not funny when I’m trying to hide the fact that I’m embarrassed about finding I had an audience to my one-woman hairband rehearsal.”

“A one-woman band? I’ve been watching you rehearse for most of my life, so you just let me know when you start touring and I’ll be sure to get myself front row tickets.”

“You’re not going to tell me that one person can’t constitute a whole band?” She asked, raising a brow.

“No, I heard it.” He ran a hand through his hair and then smiled at her again. “Am I allowed to tell you that you have lipstick on your teeth though?”

Lily rolled her eyes. “Of course, I do.” She wiped her tongue over her teeth. “This lipstick is older than that song I was just singing… or almost as old.” She felt the need to correct her own hyperbole now, just in case he thought she wasn’t joking. “You never answered my question though. What are you doing here?”

He shifted from one foot to the other, she could tell by the slight bob of his head. “Training starts in two weeks, figured I camp out with my parents until then. What are you doing back?”

Lily bit the tip of her tongue and wondered for a moment if she should lie.

“Looking for a job, I suppose.” She shrugged.

James nodded and didn’t say anything else on the subject. She didn’t know if that was supposed to make her feel better or worse. “We should grab dinner while I’m here.” He said, and she knew that he didn’t mean it to sound like bragging, but it did. _While I’m here._

“Oh yeah, just like old times.” She laughed, trying to keep her bitter thoughts out of her voice as she reminded herself that she wasn’t stuck here per say, just in limbo. It was completely different.

James shrugged. “Just to catch up.” His hand was in his hair again. She’d almost forgotten that particular quirk of his. “Or lunch if you’d rather?”

“Is lunch generally more convenient for people?”

“It’s generally less date-like. If that was your hold back.”

Lily snorted, “Were you asking me on a date?”

He hesitated for only a second. “Nah, Evans. I think I learned my lesson the first time.”

“You’ve never asked me out before.” She cocked her head to the side. There had been one time in secondary where he had pretended to ask her out in order to embarrass her, she assumed because someone had let him know that she fancied him. And then he went and said things like that, so Lily had to keep pretending that the entire thing had never happened, while also staring him down. It’d been almost five years, why did he have to go and bring it up again?

“Right.” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair, his ears remaining their normal color much to Lily’s disappointment. “Well, I was just asking to catch up. You can just say no if you want to.”

“Do you want me to say no?” She asked, slipping the scrunchy onto her wrist and then pulling at it.

“Don’t normally ask people to do things hoping they’ll say no.” He shrugged, and she wished that their houses were just a meter or two closer, so she could read the look on his face better.

“I’d like to catch up,” She said honestly, even if she also sort of dreaded the idea. There was something daunting about catching up with people who were currently ahead of you in the game of life, even if she kept repeating to herself that it wasn’t a contest and that just because she had graduated without a job didn’t mean that she had failed at something. Lots of people graduated without jobs, she was going to be fine.

She would just have less to tell James about. Though she was sure that he would be able to make up for her lack of information with all his amazing football stories. And all the antics he’d been getting up to with Sirius. And Remus. And Peter.

Lily never understood how a group of boys who were so different could stay friends for so long. She admired it though. She didn’t have the same group of friends that she started with when she was five. Though she did have Mary, who she’d met when she was twelve and she didn’t think she’d trade Mary for the world.

“Yeah?” He asked, looking surprised. “So, we’ll do lunch? Is tomorrow too soon?”

“Nah, that should work.” Lily said, surprised that James had tomorrow open.

“Alright, I’m going to send you my number really quick.” And before Lily could ask him what he meant, he’d dashed away from the window.

He reappeared a moment later with a paper airplane. He made to throw it and Lily stepped aside as the plane flew into her room. She watched it land on the floor near her dresser and then stepped back in front of her window. “What do I need your number for? You’re less than four meters from me.”

“It’s more convenient.” He grinned. “I’ve also wanted to try that for years.”

“Better than rocks.” She shrugged.

“I was a stupid child.”

“So was Sirius.”

“One of us still is.” James said in mock seriousness. Lily laughed and shook her head.

“Alright, well I should get back to unpacking before I maim myself tripping over one of these boxes.”

“Wouldn’t want that,” James was smiling now. “I should get downstairs. I told my parents I was just running up here to grab my phone. They’re going to think I got lost or something.”

Lily looked toward the back of James’ house and could see the side of a table sticking out on the back patio. Mr. and Mrs. Potter were both sitting around the side of the table that she could see, leaning back in their chairs, most likely trying to act inconspicuous in their attempts at eavesdropping.

“Nah,” Lily looked back at James, “I’m sure they know you were distracted by a pretty girl.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. Hey Mr. and Mrs. Potter!” Lily called out, causing both of them to jump slightly before they turned around and came into full view, waving up at her.

“Hello, dear!” Mia called up. “It’s so good to see you!”

“You as well.” Lily looked back at James, who had his head in his hands.

“I forgot they were going out to the patio.”

“Was that their original plan?”

“Yeah, though you shouldn’t be able to see the table from your window.”

“No?”

“Well, I can’t see your window from the table, so no.”

“Strange thing for you to know off the top of your head.”

“Is it?”

“I think so.” She nodded. “But your parents are spies, so maybe remembering small details just runs in the family.”

James laughed and shook his head again. “Perhaps. Alright, I’ll talk to you later. I’ve got to go and reprimand my parents.”

Lily laughed, thinking that it must have always gone that way. They didn’t seem the type of parents to reprimand their son all that often, if at all. They were both rather eccentric, but truly kind people. Mia, whose full name was Euphemia Evangeline Dearborn Potter, used to invite her over for tea quite often. Lily had no proof, but she was quite certain that Mia was distantly related to the queen and had left a life of privilege and wealth to marry her husband, a man with an even stranger name of Fleamont Fitzgerald Potter. Monty for short, Fitz for fun.

Though Monty ended up inventing some kind of haircare serum shortly after the couple was wed, and they had been wealthy on their own since then. The kind of wealth that you wouldn’t have thought possible when you heard that it came from a single hair product.

And they lived next door to Lily and her completely normal family.

Lily’s father had been a doctor, her mother a teacher, her sister married and well on her way to the national 2.5 kids and a white picket fence.

Lily had always thought it odd that they chose to live in the suburbs when they could have lived anywhere, but Lily often found herself wondering over several choices that the Potter’s made.

Kind people, if a bit strange.

James was a bit different. He was still strange, but not as kind. At least he hadn’t been while they were growing up.

The two of them had been friends on and off for years, but it seems like they always found something to argue and fight about before the friendship could solidify. Of course, they still lived next door to one another for their entire lives. With windows facing each other’s bedrooms, so they were privy to the on goings of one another’s lives.

James had witnessed when Jonah Chesterfield had stood up a thirteen-year-old Lily, which had embarrassingly brought her to tears within view of his window.

Lily had witnessed when Camilla Hargrove broke up with a fifteen-year-old James, which James had tried to keep her from hearing by closing the window, but Camilla was loud, and Lily had wanted to hear.

Both incidents, and countless others, had ended with James and Lily lying on their respective rooftops and doing their best to comfort the other. Jonah is a hag anyway. No one named Jonah is a nice bloke. Or Camilla shouldn’t have said any of that. Besides, she kind of looks like a mouse, don’t you think?

But they would act like it had never happened come morning while they walked to the bus stop, together only because they were going to the same place, from nearly the same place.

But they were going to get lunch tomorrow, and Lily had a paper airplane with James’ phone number on it somewhere on her bedroom floor.

She scrunched up her nose and then bent over to pick it up from where it had landed, nose under the dresser.

She quickly input the number into her phone and texted him, ‘It’s Lily Evans.’

And then she turned her attention back to her room and all the boxes that needed to be unpacked.

She wasn’t expecting him to respond, but her phone went off a minute later, easily distracting her because unpacking was the very last thing she wanted to do.

_James: Evans, I don’t think both names were necessary, but thanks._

_Lily: I don’t know how many paper airplanes you’ve thrown today, just wanted to avoid any confusion._

_James: Ahhhh, I understand. I appreciate it. I do throw a lot of paper airplanes into girl’s bedroom windows. There are so many to choose from while standing at my own window._

_Lily: See? You’re welcome._

_James: Thank you, Lily Evans._

Lily bit her lip, to stop herself from smiling or because she wasn’t sure why she was texting James like they were friends, she wasn’t sure. Then she looked over her shoulder toward James’ room, just to make sure that he wasn’t over there.

She clicked off the screen and forced her attention back to her boxes. And she didn’t pick it up again until all (most) of them were empty and put away.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> How about another chapter just for fun?  
> Enjoy!

Lily woke up the next morning to her phone ringing and so she was immediately annoyed. She threw her hand out from under her cocoon of blankets and nearly knocked her phone to the floor in her haste to pick it up and stop it from making such a god awful noise so early in the morning. Lily didn’t even know her phone knew how to ring anymore. It was uncivilized to call people these days.

Mary MacDonald’s name popped up on the screen and she swore under her breath and then answered her phone. “Are you out of your Goddamn mind?”

“Yes, because I think _the president is gonna bring the nation to the brink, of meddling in the middle of a military-“_

“Mary Elizabeth MacDonald. You did not call me at,” She pulled her phone away so she could check the time. “Seven o’clock in the bloody morning so that you could sing me Hamilton lyrics. What the hell do you want?”

“If I call you, regardless of the time of day, I’m allowed to sing you show tunes. It’s in our friendship contract.”

“I never signed anything. And calling before eight in the morning renders most legal documents null and void.”

“But our contract isn’t a legal thing. It’s just a thing of love and-“

“Mary,” Lily sighed, interrupted again to remind Mary that she was actually annoyed at having been woken so early.

“Sorry, but I wanted to call you before I went to work. I was texting Remus last night, you know, checking in and whatnot, and he told me that you and James were going to lunch today.” The line was quiet for a moment before Lily realized that there was a question hidden in the midst of that.

“Yeah,” Lily said, and then promptly let out a loud yawn. “I feel like you could have texted me to ask for confirmation. Can I go back to bed now?”

“No! I wasn’t asking for confirmation, I was asking you why you didn’t immediately call me, your best friend in the whole wide world, to let me know that you were going on a date with James Potter, the infamous Boy Next Door. The One That Got Away. The-“

Lily clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth and closed her eyes. “Mary, I’m not going on a date with him, we’re having lunch. That’s all. When I find a boy that I want to date and he asks me out, I promise that I will call you immediately, as per your request. Or maybe I’ll wait until I know you’re asleep before calling.”

“Lily, I’m your best friend in the-“

“Whole wide world-“

“Yes, so you can’t lie to me. You can’t tell me that you’ve never wanted to go out with James. I mean, I can recall at least seventeen separate instances where you had a thing for him.”

“Seventeen? Please, start listing.”

“Okay, not seventeen, but still. You fancied him a lot when we were kids.”

“I fancied him when we were seven and then for a bit in year eleven. Possibly when I was thirteen, but I still think that was just shock because he was so nice to me after what happened with Jonah.”

“What a tool.” Mary said dutifully at the mention of Jonah. “Okay, so it’s just lunch?”

“Yes, it’s just lunch. He asked if I wanted to catch up, I was a bit of a tool about it, and he was being nice, so I had to do some backtracking.”

“You were a bit of a tool?” Mary laughed.

“Yeah, you know how I can be around him. Everything feels like a competition and he’s always trying to prove that he’s smarter than me.”

“Maybe when you two were thirteen, but you know, he’s not a kid anymore either.”

“I know! I said that I backtracked.” Lily clenched her hand around her blankets.

“Alright, well I’ve got to get to work, but call me later and let me know how lunch goes.”

“No. I might text you.” Lily countered. “Have a good day at your dream job!”

“Fuck you too, Lily.” And then the line clicked. Mary wanted to work in TV, preferably in a writer’s room. But that wasn’t a job that one could typically jump into after uni. So she was currently working for a local access program that covered events going on around Dublin. But the events were mainly at retirement homes.

She pushed her phone under her pillow and did her best to fall back asleep, but she was up now. Wondering when James would text her with details for lunch.

She dragged herself out of bed and took a quick shower before she wondered downstairs and started putting together breakfast for herself and her mother.

The coffee had just finished brewing when Rose Evans walked down the stairs, still in her robe and slippers. “Oh, you really are an angel, aren’t you?” She grinned, leaning over the counter to kiss Lily’s cheek before she went about fixing her coffee.

“Yes,” Lily nodded, flipping the eggs in the frying pan before she fetched the toast.

When they were both seated at the table, Rose smiled at her daughter. “So, do you have any plans for today?”

Lily knew that it probably wasn’t there, but she thought she could hear something that sounded like disappointment. “Hopefully, I’ll finish unpacking,” Lily said. “I’ve got lunch with a friend and then I’ll start looking for a job.” Even saying that filled her with anxiety.

“You can just get something around here for now.” Rose said, taking a sip of her coffee. “I don’t want to lose you too quickly.”

“Right,” She nodded. “I might have to get something around here first anyway.”

“What friend are you getting lunch with? Mary?”

“No, not Mary. She’s in Ireland for at least the next four months. I did promise to go and visit her soon though.”

“Who then?”

“Mary isn’t my only friend, mum. I’m getting lunch with James,” Lily shrugged. “We ran into each other yesterday.”

“You didn’t leave the house- your windows.” Her mom nodded knowingly.

“Yeah. There wasn’t any fighting though, so no need to call his mum to apologize on my behalf.”

“I never called Mia to apologize for you arguing with her son. We called to each other to gossip about the things we heard you shouting at one another. You really did have a tough time getting along with that boy growing up. I’m glad that you two decided to give being civil a go.”

“Yeah well, I was almost uncivil, but I decided to be a grown up instead.”

“Good, I’m proud of you.” Lily smirked at her mother and shook her head.

“I’m glad that I make you proud by not being a dick to the neighbors.”

“That’s my girl.” Rose reached out and pinched Lily’s cheek.

After Rose left for work, and Lily found it in her to get dressed in real clothes, she started unpacking again. Luckily, she had only been at that for about ten minutes (if that) when her phone went off. She dove onto her bed and scooped it up.

James had texted her again.

_James: Hey, you look likely to set yourself on fire. You want to go to lunch now?_

Lily leaned over and looked out her window, spotting James leaning against his window frame. She laughed.

_Lily: I HATE unpacking. But it’s only nine thirty, I don’t think anywhere is serving lunch yet._

_James: Maybe we need to drive into the city to have lunch._

_Lily: Sure, sure, but I don’t think they serve lunch at ten thirty either._

_James: Well maybe we both need a half hour to get ready, and then we’ll park somewhere and walk out to the river and find a place to eat there._

Lily chewed on the tip of her tongue. Nonchalant lunch plans didn’t usually involve driving an hour into the city and then taking a walk along a river. Was he really as bored as she must have looked?

_Lily: All that so that I don’t lite myself on fire?_

_James: My parents saw my proposal fly through your window yesterday evening. They expect me to take proper care of you now._

Lily snorted despite herself and leaned over again so she could see him through the window. He was looking at her too, his crooked grin in play and a hand in his hair.

_Lily: They weren’t devastated that you asked for my hand via paper airplane?_

_James: They thought it was quirky and fun._

_James: So, we’ll leave in thirty?_

Lily bit her lip to stop a smile that he couldn’t see through the walls of her bedroom and responded back in the affirmative.

It was a little ridiculous that she was this happy to be going into the city with a boy that she’d never gotten on with all that well. A boy that had rarely, if ever, thought her worthy his time.

But if she was being honest with herself, and she was old enough to be honest with herself about this matter if not absolutely everything, then she could admit that she had played a key role in their ongoing feud when they were children. She’d egged him on and shouted just as loudly. She’d played up her competitive nature when he was involved because he got under her skin and she had wanted his attention.

Lily jumped out of bed, walking over to the window to close the curtains before she went about getting dressed. He was still leaning against his own window frame when she got there and he winked at her before she wiped the curtains across the glass.

oOo

She took her time, trying to take the entire thirty minutes because, despite what he had said, she was still worried that they would get to the city far too early to eat lunch. She started thinking about how they were going to fill the time. What were they possibly going to talk about? Was the car ride going to be long and awkward? Was James going to regret asking her to go with him ten minutes into the silence? Was she going to regret agreeing to come as soon as they pulled out of the driveway?

She messed around on her phone, sent a weird link to Mary about a woman who had supposedly given birth to a monkey, redid her hair and then double checked her purse to make sure that she had everything she’d need for the day.

It had been twenty-five minutes when she decided that there was nothing else she could possibly do. So she walked out of the house, locked the door behind her, and set off down the concrete, stopping when she reached James front door.

She hesitated for a moment, knowing that if she knocked, there was an exceptionally good chance that Mrs. Potter would answer the door. And while she was fine joking about being engaged to James, _to James_ , she didn’t want his mother thinking that there was anything going on between the two of them when there most definitely was _nothing_ going on.

“You didn’t knock, did you?” James asked, peeking his head out of the garage. Lily shook her head and rushed away from the door.

“I was debating whether or not I should text you.”

“Smart girl, my mum is very suspicious right now.”

“I kind of got that feeling earlier.”

“Yes well, my mum and dad have liked you forever. They always hoped that you and I would become friends and that you’d rub off on me.”

“Rub off on you? You’re telling me that your parents didn’t think that you were an absolutely perfect child?”

“I know, it’s hard to believe. But yes, I might have given them grey hair a year or two earlier than they would have gotten it on their own. I mean they can’t blame me entirely.”

“Yes, they can blame Sirius in equal measure.” Lily nodded.

James laughed, “Yeah, but I was insinuating that they’re old.” He waved her over to one of two cars in the garage. An older model, nothing fancy or distinguishing about it. Lily had always liked James’ perfectly ordinary car.

He opened her door for her first and then jogged around to his side. Lily rolled her eyes at his small, chivalrous, gesture.

As soon as they were both in the car, Lily remembered her fears from earlier. How she thought that they would have nothing to talk about for the next few hours.

And as they pulled out of the driveway in silence, those fears seemed as though they were becoming a reality.

Or maybe she was getting ahead of herself.

“So,” James said as he pulled off their street. “I’m afraid that this old girl only plays like two stations on the radio. And only when she’s feeling generous.” He reached up and patted the dash of his car and Lily laughed.

“Only when she’s feeling generous?” She asked, turning her body so she was facing more toward James. “And does she have a name?”

“Of course she does.” James glanced over at her and grinned. “Her name is, Edith.”

“What a lovely name. I didn’t realize your car was from the same era as your parents.” James laughed and one of his hands jumped to his hair.

“Yes, she’s as old as they are. In spirit anyway.”

“You’re attached to this car, aren’t you?” Lily asked.

“I mean, of course I am. You always hold a special place in your heart for your first.”

Lily snorted. “You know, I don’t think that’s what most people are referring to when they say that.” James looked over at her again, something unfamiliar in his eyes, but he looked back at the road before Lily could work out what it was.

“Yeah, I know. I love my car, but that doesn’t make me weird. Lots of people love their car.”

“I love my car, I suppose. His name is Arthur.”

“Arthur is a good-looking car,” James allowed. “But he’s got nothing on, my girl.” Lily laughed again and shook her head, turning to look out the window. “Your mum must be glad to have you back for a while.” He said and Lily kept looking out the window.

Lily cleared her throat. “Yeah. I’ve missed her too, so it’ll be nice for the both of us. Weird to be back in my childhood bedroom,” She looked at him now. “Even weirder to have the boy-next-door back on the other side of my window, but it’ll be nice.” She shrugged.

“Holy shit! I am the boy-next-door, aren’t I? I’ve never thought of it like that. I mean, you’re the girl-next-door, sure but…” He shook his head and Lily laughed at him. “Well people don’t usually think of themselves as the role they play in someone else’s life, yeah? And it’s not as common a phrase.”

Lily just laughed again. “Not as common, but only by a hair.”

“We don’t fit those stereotypes, though? Do we?” James was wearing a face that made Lilly want to say yes, only so she could see his reaction.

“I don’t know. I guess it depends who you ask. I don’t think your average boy-next-door is set to inherit millions of hair products and jogging off to play football in a national league.”

“Millions of hair products,” He scoffed. “But you’re right I guess, I don’t know anyone who’s set to inherit that.” He chuckled and ran a hand through his hair.

“Was that the inspiration for your father? You came out like that and he’s like, ‘I need to fix this’?”

“Very funny, Evans. In my twenty-two years, I’ve never once heard someone make that joke.” She smirked anyway. “You’re not the typical girl-next-door either. Just so you know.”

“Actually, I think I might be.” She shrugged. “My parents had typical jobs, and the typical two children, I didn’t play any sports in school, only hung out with my group of friends, stayed under the radar-“

“In what world did you ‘stay under the radar’?” James interrupted, looking over at her with his brow raised and his eyes wide. Lily pressed her lips together and shrugged again.

“I don’t really know how I’m supposed to respond to that. I meant it in the way it’s normally meant.”

“You were on everyone’s radar though!” James shook his head and kept glancing from the road to her. “I mean, you were all the teachers favorites, to start with. And then almost every bloke in school fancied you at some point or another. Many more than once.”

“No they didn’t.” It was Lily’s turn to scoff now. “No they did not.” She repeated, this time with emphasis.

“Oh they most certainly did.” James said back, almost sounding too serious. “And why wouldn’t they? You’re gorgeous and funny and confident and smart as hell. Impossible not to notice, really.” She didn’t know if she was seeing things, or if his ears really were turning red, but he wasn’t glancing over at her anymore.

“I think you’re either grossly exaggerating or misremembering.”

“I’m most definitely not misremembering things.”

“No, I mean, I am gorgeous and funny and confident and smart as hell,” Lily smiled at him and he laughed. “But people in secondary didn’t notice those things. I kept to myself for the most part. And I was just fine with that.”

“No one ever thought you weren’t. It was part of the appeal.”

“You’re talking as though you were part of this drove of adoring blokes who fancied me now, so I know you’re exaggerating.”

“Of course I fancied you in secondary.” Lily’s heart dropped to her stomach.

“No you didn’t.”

“Yes I did.” He argued. Lily looked over at him, and his ears were most definitely red now. “Of course I did. I figured I was pretty obvious about it.” He glanced over at her. “You really didn’t know?”

Lily blinked at him and he looked back at the road.

“Alright, apparently not.” He laughed, but he sounded nervous.

“We never got along.” Lily countered. “You didn’t fancy me, you couldn’t stand me. You were always arguing with me and competing with me for top marks and avoiding me-“

“I never avoided you-“

“Yes you did! You would always leave your house after I left mine when I walked to the bus so that we didn’t have to walk together.”

“That was only because I didn’t want to start off the day with you pissed at me. If I’d tried to walk with you, it would have annoyed you.”

“No it wouldn’t have.” Lily lied because she knew that it would have. Or maybe it wouldn’t have, she wasn’t so sure. If teenage James had shown teenage Lily genuine interest and attention, she probably would have been flattered and besotted. Because that’s how she felt every time he had shown her genuine interest and attention. Like when she’d been stood up and he laid out on his roof while she was on hers and he told her that she deserved better. Or when he’d somehow managed to tape a thank you note to the outside of her window after she’d called his ex-girlfriend a thick skulled gobermouch in the middle of lunch.

“It sort of seemed like everything I did annoyed you, so I think it would have.”

“You were inconsistent.” Lily huffed. James looked over at her again but didn’t say anything, only waited for her to explain herself. She took a deep breath. “I was annoyed with you a lot, and it wasn’t usually because you scored higher than me on a maths exam or something stupid like that. It just seemed like whenever I thought we were starting to be friends, you would start ignoring me. Or making fun of me. Or doing things _specifically_ to annoy me.”

James thought about that for a while, “Well, in my defense I was an idiot. We’ve already established that. And Sirius may have been going on about how dangerous the friend zone was- but that’s just an excuse I guess. Honestly, I just didn’t know how to act around you. And so I was a bit of a git. But that doesn’t mean that I didn’t fancy you. Just means I was immature and didn’t know how to handle it.”

“I mean, I was a git too.”

“Sure, and at the time, it all felt completely unjustified. But I get it now. It’s not pleasant to have your neighbor throw rocks at your window at two in the morning just to wake you up. Or have your braid tugged whenever you were talking to the pompous arsehat, Peter Hagish. Or-”

“Peter Hagish?” Lily interrupted with a snort, “I had forgotten all about him.”

“Sure you did, because you didn’t have to watch him try and flirt with you every morning.” James rolled his eyes and Lily had to bite her lip to keep from laughing. The notion that James fancied her during secondary was completely absurd to her, but he was definitely acting as though he had fancied her.

“I mean, I sort of did have to watch,”

James snorted. “I guess so, but it clearly didn’t affect you as strongly.”

“Honestly and truly, you fancied me?” Lily asked, turning toward him completely now, tucking her leg up onto the seat.

“Honestly and truly.”

She narrowed her eyes at him for a moment, waiting for the punchline, for him to start laughing, for him to take it all back.

But he just gave her a wry smile and shrugged a shoulder.

And then she remembered something he’d said yesterday when she’d asked him, jokingly of course, if he was asking her out on a date.

And he’d responded with, ‘ _I learned my lesson the first time.’_

“Fuck.” Lily said before her brain had entirely caught up with her.

James looked rather alarmed. “We were kids, Lily. It’s not that big of a deal. Actually, it’s not any kind of deal at all, it’s just something that happened-“

“Fucking hell.” She interrupted him, letting her head fall back against the seat and bringing her hands up to cover her face. James stayed quiet now and Lily didn’t notice how uncomfortable she was making him with her expletives because she was having an existential crisis.

Nothing was what she’d thought it was. Her entire childhood had just been cast in a different light, and she didn’t feel as though she came out looking so good anymore. She was no longer the vindicated, and justified girl-next-door who took no shit from James. Now she was the blind and oblivious, one could argue, heartless, arse.

“Oh goddammit.” She shook her head and dropped it forward now. “James, I’m so sorry.”

James let out a forced laugh. “You have nothing to be sorry for. I’m sorry that telling you all this made you uncomfortable. I should have just kept it to myself. I’ve ruined the day before we got out of Cokeworth.” Another forced laugh.

“No, I’m not sorry for everything, I’m sorry for what happened our last year of secondary.” 

She peeked at him in time to see him visibly pale.

“I was horrible to you.” She could feel the heat in her face. She was blushing, her heart was racing. She’d never felt this guilty for how she’d treated someone else before.

“Clearly you thought I was joking. It’s fine.”

“Why did your parents continue to be nice to me after that?”

“They thought I was joking too. Let’s just continue going on as though I had been joking. Please?”

“No, James!” Lily shouted, running a hand through her hair. “I’m trying to apologize!”

“I think we’re past it. It was forever ago.”

“No, we’re not past it, you brought it up just yesterday. I am an actual idiot and I can’t believe that you- I mean for almost everything else that happened when we were kids, I’m not sorry. You were an arse most of the time and you teased me all the time that you weren’t pretending that I didn’t exist-“

“Clearly you and I remember things very differently.” James sighed, his hand in his hair.

“Clearly. But we’d been getting along, James. You have to understand, I thought we had reached some kind of turning point. I thought that we were friends.”

“I had thought that too.” James turned his head as far away from her as he could while still being able to see the road.

“We’d been walking to and from the bus stop together, we’d been paired to work together on that project… And then you asked me out-“

“We really don’t have to talk about this.”

“No, we do. We need to just get it all out in the open and then we can move on completely.” Lily argued. “I thought you were joking because I didn’t think there was a chance in hell that you would ever have fancied me. I mean, you can ask Mary if you want.”

“I really don’t want to ask her anything.” James’ lips were pinched together.

“James, I thought you were being mean.” Lily tried a different approach.

“I understand that. I was an arse and it came back to bite me. Karma's a bitch and all that. It’s fine.”

“No, James.” Lily shook her head and steeled herself. He’d made the admission as though it was no big deal, she could do the same thing. “I thought someone had told you that I fancied you and that you were just teasing me about it.”

The silence was worse this time around. Maybe they should have stuck to not talking about it. Or not talking at all. They could have rode the whole way to London in silence, or listening to the radio whenever it decided to come in.

“ _You_ fancied _me_?” James asked after a good five minutes or so. “You fancied me in secondary? While I’d asked you out?”

“Maybe.” She said, feeling too much like a schoolgirl just then to be comfortable. She shouldn’t be embarrassed. It wasn’t like she was telling him that she currently fancied him. Then it would make sense for her to feel some kind of embarrassment. But no, she was telling him that more than five years ago she had fancied him. Ages ago really.

“We fancied each other at the same time?” James asked for clarification again and Lily clicked her tongue.

“It seems like it.”

And then James laughed. It was an honest to goodness laugh and despite herself, Lily found that she was smiling.

After a few moments, James stopped laughing and Lily let out a huff and ran her fingers over her face and up through her hair. It was hard to stop the thoughts of ‘what if’ from sprouting up as soon as the car was quiet.

He hadn’t been joking when he’d asked her out, he’d really fancied her. She’d shot him down at the time, thinking that he’d been told that Lily had fancied him, but he’d asked her out because _he_ had fancied _her._

That concept was never not going to be completely ridiculous to her.

But she could have said yes. When he asked her out, she could have said ‘yes’ and then where would they be?

Perhaps thinking that they would be anywhere other than where they were now was as completely ridiculous as James fancying her was, but what if…

What if she’d said yes and it had worked out well? What if they were somehow still dating now? What if they’d gone to the same university and now they were just home visiting together?

She glanced over at him and wondered if he was having similar ‘what if’ thoughts, but then she shook her head and looked out the window. He’d said that he’d fancied her back then, but she still wasn’t completely convinced. If he’d liked her, it was fleeting. It wasn’t how she’d fancied him. It couldn’t have been.

“You thinking the same thing I am?” James asked, one of his hands on the steering wheel and the other in his hair.

“Probably not.” Lily said, tapping her front teeth together.

“Yeah, probably not.” James agreed, reaching forward, and fiddling with the radio for a moment, until a slightly staticky station came in playing some popular love song about summer sun and cool blue waves. Lily let her fingers tap along to the familiar beat as she watched the cars race by on the other side of the motorway.

“Can I tell you what I’m thinking?” James asked after the song ended and the station went to commercial. Lily listened to a man try and sell her tires for a minute before she responded.

“What are you thinking about?” She looked over at him.

“I’m thinking that you and I could have dated in secondary if we’d been a little more honest with one another. If there’d been less confusion,” His hand went through his hair again.

“Yeah,” Lily nodded. “I guess so.”

“Everything would have been different.” He said, quietly now, and Lily glanced over at him again. He looked like he was about to be lost in thought again, and she was going to let him get lost, but she needed to know what he meant.

“What would be different?”

“Everything.” His eyes cleared as he came back to the present and looked over at her, the greens and golds in his eyes shining particularly bright.

“Yes, you said that already.” She couldn’t help the small smile.

“Well I don’t know how to be more specific than that.” James shrugged.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday friends! I had my act together and edited yesterday, which means that you get two chapters today! Probably only because chapter four is shorter, but you know. You don't get stuck with a cliffhanger now!   
> Enjoy!

They got into the city, as they had predicted, a bit too early for lunch, but by the time they were able to find a nice place to park that was near the river it was far closer to a reasonable lunch hour.

Lily’s heart was still racing a bit faster than normal as they got out of the car and started down the concrete. James was whistling now, and she didn’t know what that meant. How could someone go from being so pale and blushy to being so carefree and musical? What was it exactly that had changed his mood?

He wasn’t really _that_ relieved that Lily hadn’t shot him down so long ago for lack of feelings, was he?

Or perhaps he was hung up on the ‘what ifs’ still. He had never spelled out for her what exactly he thought would be different if she had said yes when he’d asked her out. But he’d seemed awfully certain about whatever it was that he was keeping to himself.

Lily focused on the tips of her shoes and the cracks in the sidewalk to keep herself from just staring at James’ happy face while they walked toward the shops and restaurants. She stayed close to him so that they could maneuver the crowd effectively, but she made sure that they didn’t accidentally bump into one another.

She clenched her jaw and wondered where this sudden shyness had come from. Lily was a lot of things, but shy was not one of them. But some of those what if questions were getting to her. What if she hadn’t thought it was all just s joke to him in year eleven? What if they had laid out on their respective roofs and laughed about how dumb they had both been-

“Is it against the rules to go into a sweets shop before going to lunch?” James asked, pausing in his whistling to pull her out of her head.

She blinked up at him, surprised by his question because it was so far from what she’d been thinking about. “Um… I don’t know. It might be, but fuck societal norms, yeah?” It was slightly stilted, but James didn’t seem to notice and threw his head back laughing. Lily shook her head and looked forward again, searching for the shop that would have sparked James’ question.

“Fuck societal norms.” James shoved a hand in his pocket. “And my mum always thought you’d be a good influence on me. I’m telling her that you gave me permission to have dessert first. Because she’ll know somehow. She always knows.”

“Well, she’s a spy,” Lily crossed her arms over her chest and glanced over at him again. “It’s safe to assume that she has a network of other spies working for her. They probably follow you around and report back to her.”

“What a horrifying thought. Thank you for that, Evans.” James ran a hand through his hair and looked around as though he was considering which of the patrons around them could have been working for his mother’s not-so-secret spy organization.

“It’s what I’m here for.” Lily grinned, and then spotted the small sweets shop on the street up ahead. It was just after eleven in the morning, so there weren’t many people going in and out of the shop, or perhaps there was another reason that the shop wasn’t all that busy. Lily wasn’t an expert on when people did their confectionary shopping.

“Yeah, Lily Evans is here to break the rules and tell people to do whatever they want.” James teased, “That sounds right to me.”

She tilted her head to the side and looked up at him again, still feeling her heart pounding in her chest. James was such a dork. Too attractive for his own good, but still a dork. She really shouldn’t be nervous around him for any reason at all.

Her heart continued to pound though.

“I’ll have you know, that where chocolate or pastry is involved, there are no rules that I’m not willing to break.” He laughed again and she smiled at him.

“Right, for sugar, you will break the rules.”

“I will pretend that they don’t exist.” She agreed.

He held the door open for her and they walked in.

Lily took a deep breath and felt herself relax as the smell of warm sugar and chocolate overcame her senses.

She carefully walked into the shop and started inspecting the treats around the shelves and bakery cases. Everything looked perfectly crafted and absolutely delicious.

“What are you in the mood for?” James asked, his voice quiet and close. She looked over to find him leaning in. The quiet of the shop and the cozy feeling must have made him think he couldn’t talk at a normal volume. Lily felt the same way.

“Everything.” She said honestly, a small smile on her lips. He grinned back at her and then stood up straighter and waved to someone behind the counter that Lily hadn’t noticed until then.

“What can I get you two?” The man asked. He looked as Lily thought he should, shorter, round, and jolly. If she worked in a confectionary shop, she would be round and jolly too.

“Do you have a variety pack? A sampler of some kind?” James leaned on the case and looked down at the treats.

“You tell me what looks good to you, and I’ll get you a bit of everything.” The man smiled at them. “We’ll build you a sampler.”

“Thank you, sir.” James grinned, pushing his glasses up his nose before he turned back to Lily. “Well go ahead, fill up a box.”

Lily chewed on her tongue for a moment, trying to gauge whether or not he was making fun of her, but then the man behind the counter pulled out a box and James stepped back so she could look everything over and she no longer cared if he was teasing, because she just wanted to get some of these sweets in her hands. And then into her belly.

They left the shop with more than just the sampler box. James found a mint tea candy that his mother loved, and some black liquorish jellies that he swore Remus would love, even though they made Lily turn up her nose.

“We’ll be back later,” James called over his shoulder as they walked out the door. Lily waved and then looked at the bags that James was carrying.

“I could have paid for my own. I can also carry it.” She’d waited until they were out of the shop to argue with him.

“Of course,” He nodded, though he made no move to hand her the bag. “But I dragged you out to the city for the day, so I’ll be doing the paying and the carrying.”

Lily clicked her tongue and blinked up at him. “Careful, or I’ll find something very large and heavy for you to pay for and then lug around all day.”

James just laughed and started down the street again. Lily had no choice but to follow him since he had all the chocolate that she wanted to eat.

He was already seated at a bench facing the water when she caught up with him and was pulling the sampler out of the bag. “What are you going to eat first?” He asked as she took a seat next to him. He took the lid off and inspected the candies that she’d picked out. He pulled his leg up on the bench so that he could face her completely.

“I don’t know.” She said honestly, reaching out and letting her fingers dance over the different chocolates. She stopped on one that had coconut and almonds. She took a small bite and closed her eyes to savor the flavor. “Mm, if they’re all this good I think I’m going to move into the shop.”

He laughed and took the candy from her hand while her eyes were still closed. “Hey!” She opened them and turned to see him taking a bite. She froze for a moment. “I didn’t realize we were sharing.”

“You can’t say that something is ‘move to London to live in a small shop’ good and not expect me to want to try it.” He handed it back to her and nodded. “But you’re right. That is damn good, and we’ll need to get more.”

“You told him that we’d be back.” Lily said, doing her best not to feel weird about sharing a piece of candy with James. She put the rest of it in her mouth and tried to distract herself with the taste, but James had just taken a bite from the same piece and that ended up distracting her from the taste.

Tragic, and stupid really.

It felt like a date.

She realized that after a few more shared candies. The smiling and him holding doors and bags and buying her candy. He had said yesterday that it wasn’t a date, and that had felt true enough when she had gotten into the car, but then they talked about how they’d both fancied each other five years ago, and now it felt like a date.

And she was quite sure that he was doing it on purpose.

Now she was antsy.

She didn’t want to just sit here on the bench and continue to eat candies that she couldn’t fully appreciate because James was distracting her. She felt like she needed to get up and move. And without a plan, she jumped to her feet.

“Let’s go and walk along the river for a bit.” She said. “I used to watch the boats come in with my great aunt.”

James didn’t mention how she’d jumped off the bench, he just put the candies back in the bag and stood up. “Lead the way,” He motioned for her to head in the direction she wanted to go in and then fell into step beside her. “Was that the aunt that would come and stay with your family during the summers?”

“Yeah,” Lily nodded. “Aunt Maggie. She was a pretty interesting person. She lived next door to my gran, her sister. I always thought it would be neat to live next to my sister.” She was speaking in stilted sentences, she could hear it, but she couldn’t stop herself. She had just realized that walking along the river wasn’t any less date-like than sharing candies on the bench. “But then, you know…” She trailed off.

“Petunia isn’t girl-next-door material.” James offered, stating in the nicest way possible that Petunia was rotten and terrible. She’d gotten married before she’d even finished uni, and then she’d dropped out. That wasn’t why she was terrible, Lily knew plenty of nice girls who got married young and didn’t finish or attend school. But when Lily had asked her why she seemed to be in such a hurry to grow up, her response had been that she was tired of having to see Lily so often.

Of course, she’d said plenty of things that shouldn’t have led Lily to be surprised at her response, but then Lily had been passed over on being a bridesmaid for a distant cousin, and Petunia hadn’t let her bring a date, nor did she take any pictures with her.

Why had she brought up her sister? This wasn’t a better topic to think about than the weirdness that was going on between her and James. Now she was anxious over the fact that she’d probably have to see Petunia soon, that she was going to make snide comments about how Lily’s previous relationship had ended before it could amount to anything ‘real.’

Apparently, she didn’t consider year and half long relationships real if they didn’t build to a marriage proposal. As far as Petunia was concerned, Lily had wasted all that time.

“In your head?” James asked, switching the bags from one hand to the other, so the hand closest to her was now empty. Was he going to try and hold her hand? Or had he noticed the bags bump her leg?

“I’m always in my head,” Lily sighed, reaching up and rubbing her hands over her face and pushing her hair back. “It’s exhausting.”

James chuckled and she saw him rake his hand through his hair out of the corner of her eye. “What’s got you in your head now?”

“I mentioned my sister. It made me think about her wedding and how awful she was to me. And then that made me think of my ex, who she didn’t let me bring to her wedding and how awful she was after we broke up.”

“She is not afraid to share her opinions.” Again, he was putting it mildly and she laughed. “And before that?” James asked, because of course he’d noticed how weird she’d been when they were eating the candies that she’d been so excited about.

Lily sighed. Should she rip off the band aid? It might ruin the rest of the day. Currently, if she got out of her head, it was still salvageable. And even if they left now, they still had an hour-long car ride to get through. She chewed on her lip and then looked at him, decided on a half-truth. “You bought all the candies.”

James looked at her, stopping in the middle of the concrete. “Yes.” Lily pulled his arm and led them to the edge of the concrete when an elderly couple huffed behind them. “Lily, I told you that I was going to pay because this entire trip was my idea.”

“And I understand that, but it’s just weird.”

“Why is it weird?”

“I don’t know how to explain it to you,” She said, trying to think of a good example. “I guess it’s partially weird because I don’t have a job right now,” And then her cheeks were red, both because that hadn’t been the reason she meant to give, and because this was a sore spot for her. “And it doesn’t really look as though I’ll have a job soon. Not a _real_ job anyway.”

“All the more reason for me to treat you,” He said, and she knew that it wasn’t a big deal to him. She knew that he was going to try and make her feel as though she was making a mountain out of a mole hill.

Or she thought she knew that, but then he went on.

“Look, I didn’t buy you the candy because I didn’t think that you could buy it yourself. You made it quite clear that you were going to get something in that shop, if not trick the owner into handing you the keys.” Lily pressed her lips together to suppress a grin. “And it’s easy for me to do nice things for my friends when the nice things involve money, because my dad got lucky with his stupid hair care product and we have more money than we could ever need. I spend it on other people to help ease the guilt that comes with not having worked for the things that you have.”

Lily chewed on her lip again. “You shouldn’t feel guilty.” What a dumb response.

“And you shouldn’t feel bad about not having a job straight out of college. Shall we state some more obvious truths?”

Lily almost stomped her foot. “Of course, I feel bad about it! I didn’t want to _have_ to move back in with my mum. And I didn’t want to feel jealous when I see all my friends from school posting about their new jobs that they got in their chosen field.”

“Okay, and I can’t stop feeling guilty about the money thing. Even saying that makes me feel like an absolute git.” His hand was back in his hair.

“I feel behind.” Lily admitted, crossing her arms over her chest. She was being more honest with him than she wanted to, though she was admitting a different truth, it was still a truth. A truth that she hadn’t talked about with anyone else yet. Well, except Mary of course.

“That’s only because you’re brilliant, have been your entire life, and you’re not ahead of everyone else anymore. But that doesn’t mean you’re behind. There’s not some timeline that you’re supposed to be following, so it’s impossible for you to be behind, Evans.” She considered what he’d said for a moment quietly, chewing on the tip of her tongue now.

“I suppose.” She said at length.

“Anything else on your mind?” He grinned, tilting his head at her and making her heart jump in her chest like it used to do when they were kids. How dumb. All he had to do was look at her and she was dealing with her heart jumping all over the place again.

“Yeah,” She braced herself and decided to be brave. “Are you sure you didn’t buy the candies because you wanted this to feel more like a date?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: And here is part two of the double update! 
> 
> Don't forget to comment! Let me know what you're thinking!

“Of course I wanted this to feel like a date,” James shook his head slightly and narrowed his eyes, as though it should have been completely obvious to her this whole time.

She blinked at him, her lips pressed into a thin line and her arms still crossed over her chest.

When she didn’t respond to that right away, he started to lose a bit of his nerve and his hand jumped up to his hair. “Well, it didn’t start off that way. I mean, when I asked you this morning if you wanted to go to the city, I’d hoped- but I didn’t think anything would come of it. But then you told me that you fancied me-“

“Five years ago!” Lily threw her hands up in exasperation. “I fancied you five years ago, and we haven’t talked much at all in the last four years. I mean, we’ve hardly even seen each other!”

He waved off her comments. “I know how long ago it was,” He took a step back and looked out at the water for a moment before turning back to her. “But I don’t know, Lily. I guess I saw this as a chance to do things over.”

“Do things over?” Lily shook her head. “We never really did things the first go around. Unless you count yelling at one another.”

“Yeah, but we haven’t done any of that so far, have we?”

Lily didn’t think that that sounded like a sound argument in favor of whatever it was that he was suggesting, but he was grinning at her now, that same grin from earlier. That grin of his that shouldn’t make her feel like a schoolgirl again, but it definitely did.

“Besides, who cares if we do start arguing again. I’ve always liked arguing with you.” He readjusted his grip on the bags and they rustled. Lily tilted her head and narrowed her brow, not willing to admit that she’d always found enjoyment in their arguments as well. That was probably why she’d initiated so many arguments. Having his attention was often better than him ignoring her. Now didn’t seem like the right time to admit to something like that.

“I’m going to keep talking if you don’t say something.” James warned her. Lily shrugged and let out a laugh as she pushed her hair away from her face with both hands.

“I’m not sure what to say, James. You want to just, turn this into a date now? See how things go?”

“Yes.” He nodded. “Which is also what you should say you want!”

“You’re leaving in two weeks!” She reminded him. “Which bodes well if this goes to hell in a handbasket, but-“

“It’s not going to go to hell in a handbasket, thank you very much. I’m a great date and we’ve been having a great time!” He shook his head and laughed. He looked at the bags in his hand for a moment and then set them down at his feet and reached out, putting his hands on her shoulders, holding her in front of him. “Besides, I’m going to play football, not disappearing off the face of the earth. If things work out, which they probably will-“ Lily tried to interrupt here, but James just spoke louder and tightened his hold on her upper arms. “Then we can figure things out from there.”

“Well what if I don’t want to do that. I hate figuring things out after the fact. You just talked me off a ledge about five minutes ago because I’m stuck figuring things out after the fact.” She crossed her arms over her chest, wondering if perhaps she should have just continued to complain about her sister. She had a lot of material there, she wouldn’t have run out of things to say and James would have eventually forgotten that she’d had anything else on her mind.

James looked over her face for a moment, making her avert her gaze. “If you really don’t want to give this a go, then that’s fine. This doesn’t have to be a date. But I will probably spend the next two weeks trying to change your mind. Nicely of course. Without ignoring you or throwing any rocks at all.”

Lily shuffled and then turned toward the river, causing him to drop his arms to his side, and then she put her arms on the rail.

“We’ve got nothing to lose, Evans.” James said quietly, coming up to stand awfully close to her. “Despite what I wanted in secondary, we stopped talking to each other four years ago, we haven’t been friends since before uni, if this all falls apart, we’re not losing anything.” Lily didn’t feel like that was true, but she didn’t really know what exactly she would be losing.

“Look, James, I’m still trying to digest the fact that you think you fancied me-“

“I did fancy you.” He interrupted forcefully. “Since about year six.”

“Don’t be ridiculous,” Lily snorted.

“I’m not joking.”

She looked over at him and his face was completely serious and Lily blushed. “Since we were eleven?”

“Yes!” He smiled at her and pushed his glasses up his nose. “Lily, I’ve been besotted with you for half my life! And then you told me that you had feelings for me too, and since you were the ‘one that got away,’ of course I want to try and give things a go.”

“You’ve liked me since you eleven, and there was not one point in all that time where you thought, ‘huh, if I want Lily to like me back, I might try being nice to her?’” She elbowed him, because the alternative to elbowing him seemed like telling him when she first started fancying him and she didn’t want to do that.

“I teased you.”

“I remember.” She gave him a wry smile. “I thought you didn’t like me at all, we’ve been over this.” No, she really didn’t want to tell him that she’d fancied him before year eleven.

“Completely ridiculous.” James scoffed.

They both looked out at the river for a few moments in silence, but James had never been all that good at silence before.

“So you’re undecided then?”

“I think it’s a terrible idea, actually. Again, you’re leaving in two weeks and I’ll be here. Here being Cokeworth, of course.”

“I still think that’s a nonissue.”

“You also thought it was a clever idea to tell everyone in school that I snogged my NSYNC poster.”

“I was jealous.”

“Okay, but I didn’t snog the poster!” Lily laughed, hitting her hands against the rail.

James smiled at her. “Come one, let’s go and get lunch.”

They ended up walking around, James telling her about all the different places where Sirius was no longer welcomed as they passed such places, and Lily pointing out more sweet shops and hidden bookstores.

“They’re not hidden,” James countered. “That would be horrible for business.”

“I disagree.” Lily argued, eyeing a particularly dusty window display with longing.

“After lunch, alright? We can wander around the bookshops after lunch. I think I’m finally hungry.”

Lily’s stomach was in need of something that wasn’t entirely chocolate as well, so she looked away from the display, sure that she’d never be able to find the shop again, but sufficiently distracted by the smell of fresh bread. “I want that,” She said.

“What?” He looked around.

“Whatever that smell is, I want that.”

James took a big whiff. “You smell bread?”

“Yes.” Lily nodded.

“Bread and chocolate? That’s almost too easy, Evans.”

Lily shrugged. “Yes well, no one ever said I was difficult.” Her phone buzzed in her pocket, and Lily just knew it was Mary somehow. She’d probably sensed what Lily had said and was texting her to set her straight.

“You’ve always seemed like a mystery to me.”

Lily stopped walking. “See, that’s another reason that dating now is a bad idea.” James had taken a few extra steps before he realized she wasn’t beside him.

He turned back to her with an amused smile. “Please, enlighten me.”

“You don’t know me! If you’ve fancied me since you were eleven, and we’ve never been friends for more than a couple weeks at a time, then you don’t know me. You probably have some version of me in your head that doesn’t even exist in real life.”

“You think I manic-pixie-dream-girled you?”

Lily blinked. “Are we using that as a verb now?”

“Lily, I know plenty about you.” James turned back around and started walking. Lily had to hurry to catch up with his much longer legs. “But please, continue to tell me what all my obstacles are going to be. It’ll take some of the guesswork out.”

Lily rolled her eyes, “Let’s just go and find the bread, please.”

She didn’t know why he was acting so comfortable with this conversation. Lily had never been good at conversations about feelings, and he was acting as though they talked about this kind of shit all the time. Where was the blushy boy from the car who couldn’t deal with the fact that she was apologizing for having been mean to him when they were kids? She wanted him back. He wouldn’t be saying these things.

“Of course,” James nodded. “I’m fairly sure the smell is coming from over there,” He pointed at a bistro nearby, the name of the place, artfully written out on a sign in the shape of a loaf of bread.

“That looks right,” She nodded.

“I don’t think you’re perfect.”

“I thought we were tabling this discussion.”

“I know, but I don’t think you’re perfect and I haven’t built you up into something unattainable in my head during the last four years. I just feel like we’ve been given an opportunity here.”

Lily clenched her hands and then stopped walking and faced him. “Okay, I am really glad that we were able to clear the air between the two of us. That I don’t have to continue on in life wondering why you hated me for all of our childhood. But again, and I can’t stress this enough, you are moving to the other side of the country in two weeks.”

“The other side is a bit dramatic.” James ran a hand through his hair. “You sound a bit like Sirius and my mother.”

“Also, again again, I can’t stress this enough, you and I haven’t spoke except in pleasantries, in over four years.”

“That is not dramatic,” James said.

“Why is pointing out that you’re moving, dramatic?”

“Because ‘the other side of the country’ is like an hour train ride. I’m not moving to Canada.”

Why was this so important to him? Why did Lily feel like it was such a big deal? People went on dates all the time and it wasn’t a big deal. She could say yes, let him buy her some bread and maybe snog him a bit at the end. It didn’t sound like a terrible idea, but dating James Potter, the infamous boy-next-door, didn’t seem like a decision that should be made flippantly or while intoxicated on bread fumes.

Sixteen-year-old Lily would not be happy with her right now.

James let out a sigh and looked up at the sky. “I don’t want to hold you hostage here, Lily.” She gave him a look and snorted. He tilted his head and grinned, “Look, this isn’t a date. I know that, we agreed on that before we headed out.” He looked back at her, his glasses slightly askew. “Do you want to head home now?”

Lily narrowed her eyes. “No, James. I want bread. I’ve said that three times now.”

He chuckled and shook his head. “Right, my bad. But I’ll back off for now, I just got excited, I guess. I’ll save the wooing for when we get home.”

“Wooing?”

“Yes,” He nodded, starting toward the bistro again.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, I got two chapters edited again so I'm going to post both of them. I think this might be the last week I do that, because these are the last 'short' chapters, but who knows?   
> Enjoy!

It was surprisingly easy to forget that James had tried to convince her that this was a date. Not that he stopped acting like it was a date. He was still overly polite and insisted on paying for everything and flirted with her shamelessly, but they stopped talking about it and started talking about other things and it was extremely easy for Lily to remember why it was that she’d fancied James so frequently. Well, not frequently per say, but more frequently than she’d let Mary know about.

James was kind of great.

And he knew that he was kind of great, but he was so good natured about it that you didn’t mind. He was smart and funny, especially now that he wasn’t trying to show her up all the time.

By the time they were back in his car, it was late afternoon, and he was carrying a bag of books that she’d picked out at three different bookshops that he’d pointed out to her. He hadn’t tried to deter her from entering any of them. She quite liked that about him as well.

“We should almost stay for dinner at this point,” James grinned, rolling down his window before he started to pull into the street.

“Almost,” Lily agreed. She felt content. They’d been out walking in the sun for most of the day, so her arms were pink and warm, they’d be burnt later, but they felt alright at the moment. Her legs were tired, her feet were a bit sore, but that only added to her contentment. “Today was a good day.”

James looked over at her and hesitated for just a moment too long. “Yes,” He nodded his head quickly. “It was a good _day_. I can’t believe the sun stayed out as long as it did. You’re going to be burnt.”

He’d thought she’d said ‘date’ for a moment.

“I am going to be burnt. But that’s alright. I’ve got a lot of chocolate I can eat to console myself and books I can read to distract myself.”

“Does chocolate help a sunburn?” He chuckled.

“Chocolate helps everything. You’re friends with Remus, you should know that.”

James laughed and Lily turned her head so she could watch his profile.

“You’re probably a bit burnt too.” She reached over and poked his arm. 

“I don’t burn. Power of the pigment.”

Lily let out a huff of laughter. “What’s this then? A flaw in the mutation?” Lily asked, holding up her arm. “I’m so white that I’m literally allergic to the sun?” James laughed at her, flashing his smile at her head on for a moment as they came to a stop.

“You’re just going to get extra freckly now.” He shrugged. “That’s not a terrible thing.”

Lily looked down at her arms. “I didn’t even think to pack sunscreen this morning.”

“No one ever thinks they’re going to see the sun when they go to London.” James shrugged a shoulder.

“Fair point.” Lily reached for the radio and started fiddling with the dial. Soon a song was coming through the speakers, with limited static. “You might need a new radio.”

“I might.” He agreed. “Though I was worried you were about to say ‘car.’”

Lily shook her head. “Wouldn’t bother.”

“Good.” He was still smiling.

“So explain the whole football thing to me.” Lily pulled her legs up and crossed them on the chair as she broached a subject that they surprisingly hadn’t covered yet. “Who are you going to play for?”

James took in a breath through his teeth. “I don’t quite know yet.”

“But not your pick of the litter?”

He chuckled. “Not quite. It’s narrowed down to two clubs. I’ve just got a decision to make.” He shrugged like it was no big deal, but Lily noticed how his shoulders stayed tense and how the corner of his mouth had dimpled. He was anxious about this. “My agent sent me out here so I can relax a bit before I have to sign all the paperwork and make things official.”

Lily nodded. “So today was a bit of a necessary distraction for you? And then I brought up the problem anyway?” She smiled at him.

“I’ve always been easily distracted by you,” He allowed, keeping his eyes on the road and missing Lily’s cheeks tint red. “But no, I’m not trying to avoid thinking about it. I just agreed that a little distance between me and all the fuss wouldn’t hurt.”

“Can I ask what the clubs are? Or is it top secret until you make an official announcement.”

He pressed his lips together for a moment and then shrugged. “You’ll forget as soon as I tell you anyway. The Canons or the Falcons.”

“Your favorite teams!” Lily laughed. She’d thought the decision was hard for other reasons, not because he could never make a definitive statement about what his favorite team was.

He glanced over at her, eyes narrowed. “How do you know that?”

“I’ve lived next door to you my entire life, how would I not know that?” She shook her head, “You’ve got a jersey from both teams hanging up across from your window, you looked completely miserable whenever they played one another and whenever your house got extra loud in the evening, we all knew why. _‘Raffi Ovesian! He just did it again! Oh my goodness_!’ Or who was the other guy,” James was laughing now. “Caimin Mac Cathail, Mahdad Faqir? Mary had quite the crush on Faqir. And Ovesian. Actually she had a crush on almost every football player that you did.”

James shook his head. “I didn’t know that you knew anything about football.”

“I don’t know much, but my dad and I used to watch games together. And then, like I said, Mary was obsessed with a few.” She might have tried to pay attention to some of the players whose names she saw on James’ jerseys as well, but she didn’t want to share that at the moment. Not when he’d spent a good part of the morning trying to convince her that their outing should be a date.

“Well alright then. Keep the teams to yourself.”

“Mums the word.” She nodded. “You’re gonna have to flip a coin or something, aren’t you?”

James tapped his hand on the wheel and nodded. “That sounds about right.”

“That’s great though. It’s a fantastic problem to have. Imagine if you were in the position to choose between the Tornados and the Wasps,” She laughed.

James was looking at her again, or glancing between her and the road anyway, but she just kept looking out her window. “Well, I think I’d just have to quit if that were the case. Can I ask you something?”

“No,” She shook her head, sure that she knew what his question was going to be.

“Okay,” He nodded. “So when exactly did you fancy me?”

She huffed and sunk down into her seat. “I said that you couldn’t ask me anything. Also I just remembered that someone texted me about three hours ago.” She pulled her phone out and flinched when she saw that she had twelve new texts from Mary. “Nevermind, I don’t want to look at whatever Mary sent me.”

“Does she know that you’re spending the day with me?”

“Maybe.” Lily shook her head. “I mean your stupid mate might have told her.”

“Remus?” He guessed.

“Rude of him if you ask me. Because then she decided to wake me up at an ungodly early hour to ask me a million questions.”

“By that, you mean she teased you about you having agreed to go on a date with me.”

“I mean, that is exactly what she did, but it’s not what I agreed to.”

“Yes, I know that. But I also remember what Mary is like. And Remus did tell me what she said to him so.”

“She was mad at me because I hadn’t told her about our plans.”

James nodded. “So back to my question,”

She could lie, but give him an answer to his question. Or she could see what Mary had texted her. She didn’t want to do either.

“I don’t know James.” Lily muttered, twirling her phone around in her hands. “I fancied you for a while in year eleven.”

“Okay.”

“Look,” She sat up straight now and turned toward him. “I didn’t like you all the time. Most of the time I didn’t like you, but then sometimes I would just- I don’t know. It was an on again off again thing.”

“You’re doing a lot of vague talking. That’s what my mum calls it when Sirius won’t tell her where he’s been all night and just keeps listing weird and unhelpful details.”

“It started when we were seven and you told Kyle off for breaking my headband.” James' jaw actually dropped so Lily went on, “But it stopped a week or two later when you threw a football at Bertram’s head and gave him a bloody nose.”

He laughed, “Ah Bertram. I’m glad that he was able to forgive me for that.”

“Yes, before you move to the other side of the country.”

He shook his head. “You fancied me when you were seven? That’s adorable, Evans.”

She closed her eyes and gave him a sarcastic smile.

“So, in reality, we both went through our adolescence fancying one another and believing the other person to be, at best, indifferent.”

“Yes, it seems like that is what happened.” Lily nodded. “I’m so glad that we could figure that out.”

“Me too,” James nodded, only he didn’t sound sarcastic. “It changes everything.”

“There’s that word again.”

“Yeah,” He nodded. “Only I feel like you’re starting to get what I mean.”

Lily clicked her tongue, “I understood you the first time.”

“I mean, I thought so. You seemed like you were only pretending to misunderstand me. Now see what Mary wants so she doesn’t call the police and tell them that I kidnapped you.”

Lily looked at him and then grinned. “It’s almost as though you are also friends with her.” James laughed and Lily pulled out her phone.

Mary: Have fun on your lunch DATE

Mary: Oops, that was a typo, please ignore that

Mary: Though I do think that it’s a little weird that on this non date lunch date, you haven’t felt the need to check your phone once

Mary: I mean, this is my fourth text and you haven’t even looked at these messages yet

Mary: What could you two possibly be up to that would keep you off your phone this long?

Mary: I believe snogging may be involved

Mary: Okay so now I’m starting to worry though I’m hoping you dropped your phone in the river or something because I was texting you too much

Mary: I will report James if he kidnaps you

Mary: If he brings you back now though, I will still allow him to marry you

Mary: But if he doesn’t give you your phone back I’m going to shave his stupid head

Mary: Lily Jane Evans, answer me please

Mary: LILY JANE

Her last text had been sent only seven minutes ago so she quickly typed out a lengthy response.

Lily: I need you to not tease me right now, okay. James is doing enough of that for about seven of you. AND you’re not supposed to be on your phone when you are hanging out with someone, it’s RUDE! You and I have lots to talk about, but not right now because I’m still with him. We’re driving back from London, WHICH I WILL EXPLAIN LATER PLEASE AND THANK YOU FOR BEING CHILL

She didn’t think that her text was going to deter Mary from sending more texts, but she was most definitely not going to text Mary with James in the seat next to her, even if he was driving and incapable of reading what she was writing.

“She did think that you had kidnapped me, so good call.” She said, turning off her screen and shoving it into her lap. “She wants you to know that she would report you if you did that.”

He nodded. “Well I guess that takes that off the table.”

“Yeah,” Lily poked her forearm and watched her white fingerprint change back to pink.

“Do you have aloe?” He asked.

“We should. I mean this isn’t an uncommon problem in our house.”

“Failure of the mutation.” He repeated her earlier phrase with a nod.

The drive home always felt shorter than the ride to somewhere, but Lily was surprised to see the diner that was just a few blocks from her house.

“Should we stop in for chips and chocolate shakes?” James asked, looking over at Lily.

It was appealing, but she thought she might get sick if she tried to eat anything more. “If I hadn’t eaten those last three bread sticks, then I’d probably say yes, but if I see a chocolate shake right now…”

James laughed. “You did eat an impressive amount of bread.”

“It was really good bread,” She shrugged.

“I agree. We can get chips and shakes another time. Tomorrow maybe?”

“Maybe,” Lily shrugged, though she knew that he wasn’t going to let her be non-committal. “If I survive my phone call with Mary tonight.”

James laughed. “It’ll have to be dinner tomorrow though. Sirius and I are going- furniture shopping? I’m not actually sure, but it sounded important to him.”

“You’re not sure if you’re going furniture shopping?” Lily laughed and then felt a bit disappointed when she saw their houses come into view. She didn’t want to feel disappointed of course, but she did. She had had a lot of fun with James today, even if there had been a lot of stress as well, and she wasn’t ready for it to end. But at the same time, she didn’t want to get used to spending a lot of time with him if he was only here for a couple of weeks.

“He phrased it weird. I’ll let you know tomorrow. There’s a boy involved. Benjy. It’s the first time Sirius has ever dated anyone and he’s being a little odd about it.”

“I didn’t know that,” Lily said, “Which means Mary didn’t know that.” And that was what was really strange.

“It’s pretty new.” James shrugged. “They haven’t posted about it or anything.”

Lily nodded. “I can’t believe I know something before Mary do- not that I’m going to run and gossip about your best mate of course.”

“I don’t think it counts as gossiping when you’re telling your best friend something.” James shrugged.

“It does, it’s just not as harmful as other forms of gossip. Though if it’s new, maybe I shouldn’t tell her, because she does like to gossip and might tell other people.”

James tilted his head back and forth.

“When did it start?” 

“Last month.” James laughed. “Sirius didn’t want to tell me about it. It was great fun for me. I’ve never got to tease him about catching feelings before. It’s about time I got some payback on that front.”

He pulled into her driveway before Lily realized that he was doing it and she gave him a look. “Why did you do that?” She asked.

“I’m dropping you off at your house.”

“Yes, but your- thank you, James.” She shook her head and took a deep breath before she opened her door. He was out of the car by the time she had her door shut, and gathering up her bags from the backseat. “This is because your mum is probably watching, isn’t it?”

“I thought we had established that she’s been watching the entire time.”

“Right, through her network of spies,” Lily reached out to take the bags and James looked conflicted. “I know that you’ve been carrying them all day, but I promise you that I am in fact capable of doing it myself.”

“I know that,” He handed them over. “I was just trying to work out if I should walk you to the door or not.” He glanced over his shoulder toward his house. “I don’t think my parents are home at the moment, but still.” He smiled at her.

Lily found herself smiling back at him, not even looking for something to say.

His smile got larger after a minute and Lily looked down at her shoes. “Thanks for driving today.” She said, “Even if I did spend a significant portion of the drive worried for my safety.”

James’ smile diminished at that. “Hey now,” He tapped the top of Edith’s hood and something made a rattling sound. He flinched and pulled his hand away. “She’s not going to fall apart.” He shook his head. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” He waved and then started walking back to the driver’s side, perhaps before she could refute him.

“See ya,” She waved as well and then started for her porch. She figured it was best to get inside before he parked his car in his own driveway and they were stuck three meters apart, which was an awkward distance to end a non-date on.

Lily’s phone started ringing almost as soon as she stepped in the front door.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here is the second chapter of the weekend! I hope you laugh as much as I did while writing it!  
> Enjoy!

The conversation with Mary was long and confusing. She was still talking to her when her mum finally got home from work, and then still after her mum had finished making dinner for the two of them. It was her own fault because she had told Mary everything, even all of the stuff that she had told herself she wasn’t going to tell Mary. But that was always how it went, so Lily didn’t know why she bothered pretending that anything else would happen.

And then when she sat down to dinner with her mum, her mum had a whole host of questions for her as well. “You know,” Rose started. “I got an interesting call from Mia this morning.”

Lily’s shoulders slumped. “Yes mum, James and I went to London for the day and spent the entire day together and he bought me chocolate and books and lunch and he wanted it to be a date and I said that I didn’t think it was a good idea because he’s moving to the other side of the country in a couple of weeks and I have no clue what I’m doing and then he told me that he was going to try and woo me. I just had this conversation with Mary.”

Rose blinked at her. “Mia did not have all of that information.” She laughed and clapped her hands together and Lily sighed.

“I’m sure she does now.” Lily narrowed her brows and took a sip of her iced tea. Her mum’s iced tea was the only iced tea that she liked. “Did you know that James fancied me when we were kids?”

Rose shrugged. “Mia and I had our suspicions about the both of you. I told you a few different times that I thought he might fancy you, but you didn’t want to hear it.” Lily remembered a few occasions where her mum had suggested just that.

“Did you know that I fancied him?”

“Oh yes,”

“Did you tell Mia?”

“No,” Rose shook her head. “I mean, I told her when you were seven, but you were too young for it to mean anything then. I didn’t tell her when you were older.”

She took another deep breath and told her mum about what really happened when James had asked her out in year eleven.

“After James and I worked all that out, he kept going on about how everything would have been different if we had been more honest with each other as kids.”

“And then he started talking about wooing you and buying you your favorite things.”

“Mum, the bread at that bistro is to die for. We’ll have to take gran the next time we visit her.”

Rose laughed. “So? What are you going to do now?”

“He’s moving across the country in two weeks,” Lily repeated. “I’m not going to date him for two weeks.”

“I didn’t know that people had to live next door to one another to be allowed to date.” Rose took a sip of her own iced tea and then picked up her fork to dig into her meal. “Mia said that he’ll probably only be an hour away by train.”

“Sure- “

“And who knows, maybe you’ll end up getting a job that requires an even shorter train ride- “

“Let’s not talk about Lily getting a job right now, I’m stressed enough.”

“Yes, right. I wasn’t trying to stress you out, I just meant that you don’t know what could happen.”

“Well, that stresses me out.”

Rose smiled at her and nodded. “I know that it does, but some of the best things in life require you to let go and trust that someone else is gonna catch you.”

Lily shook her head. “I’m quite comfortable in the knowledge that I can catch myself.”

“It’s a metaphor Lily,”

“I understand that,” Lily nodded. “Look, I spent a lot of time fancying James, and this just doesn’t seem like it can end well. Because things between James and I have never gone well. There’s always some kind of hiccup, something that keeps us apart, or from being friends. Agreeing to go into this, knowing that there is a big thing that will literally keep us apart, seems like I’d be asking for heartbreak.”

“There’s not a right or wrong answer here,” Rose shrugged. “And I’m not going to tell you what to do. At the end of the day, you’ll have to decide if you want to take that risk or not.”

Lily sighed. “It feels like there is a right choice.”

_We have nothing to lose._

Then why did it feel like they definitely had something to lose?

She was quiet, and her mum let her get lost in thought while they both ate their meal. “What if it doesn’t work out? What happens then?”

“Then you learn something. You grow and you’re able to put this behind you. If you try and it doesn’t work, then you don’t have the ‘what ifs’ flying through your head for the rest of your life.”

“The rest of my life?” Lily blanched. “And people wonder why I’m dramatic.”

Rose smiled. “Do you not already have a bunch of ‘what ifs’ floating around your head?”

She had her there. “Maybe. We’re going to dinner tomorrow. Just at the diner.”

Rose smiled. “It’s been a minute since I’ve been to the diner.”

Lily nodded. Her mum had told her that there wasn’t a right or wrong choice, but she seemed pretty glad that Lily had agreed to see James again.

Lily was pretty glad about it too; she just wasn’t sure how glad she should allow herself to be.

And that just brought her back to feeling dumb, because people did this all the time, they went on dates all the time! And here she was, making a huge deal out of it. Why couldn’t she think about this like James was thinking about this? He didn’t seem to have a problem realizing that the two of them hanging out and going on dates wasn’t a big deal.

Mary didn’t seem to understand why Lily thought it was as big a deal as it felt like. “Go on some dates with your childhood crush! See where the feelings lead! Maybe you’ll get a few good snogs out of it!” That had been her advice.

“I wish I knew how to turn off my brain,” Lily muttered, angrily stabbing a roasted potato.

“If you figure out how to do that, please let me know,” Rose grinned.

“Will do.” Lily promised.

“Shall we watch a movie when we’re done?”

“Which movie did you have in mind?”

“Oh, I was going to let you choose,” Rose shrugged.

“Yes, but between which two movies were you going to let me choose from?”

Rose laughed and Lily grinned at her mum. “I’m in the mood for pirates, so you can choose between four movies.”

Lily laughed, “Alright, well then let's start with the first one and we’ll make our way through them all.”

“Not tonight!” Rose shook her head. “I can’t stay up past ten without falling asleep wherever I am.”

Lily snorted and took another bite. “I didn’t mean that we should watch them all tonight, we can watch the second one tomorrow.”

Rose nodded. “I’m glad to have you home, Lily.” Lily looked down at her plate. “I know this wasn’t your plan, but I want you to know that you should still be proud of yourself for everything you’ve already accomplished. I know I don’t need to tell you that I’m proud of you, so that’s why I’m telling you that you’re allowed to be proud of yourself.”

Lily looked up at her mum and gave her a small smile, “Thank you, mum. I know most of this disappointment is just in my head- “

“All of it. The only time I’ve ever been disappointed in you is when you were six and you got caught putting worms in your grandmother’s sugar bowl.”

Lily laughed loudly and then shook her head. “I was very upset with her!”

“I wasn’t happy with her either. I said I was disappointed that you got caught, not that you had done it in the first place. If you hadn’t got caught, she would have blamed it on one of your cousins and my brother wouldn’t have given me that smug look of his.”

“Smug look?” 

“Yes, when you have children, and your mother reprimands one of them, it’s like getting reprimanded yourself. So, he was smug. Some things never change.”

“Dad thought it was funny.”

“Yes,” Rose nodded. “He thought everything you did was amusing. I wonder what he’d have to say about you and James.”

“Muuuum,” Lily groaned and stood up from the table, shoving the last bite of potatoes into her mouth as she walked to the sink. “There is no me and James! We went to lunch- “

“I wasn’t implying that you were dating him now! I was only wondering what your father would think about everything.”

“Yes, yes, let’s just go and watch our movie now.”

“You set it up while I put everything away.”

“Red or white?”

“Red,” She answered, and Lily grabbed two wine glasses and walked over to the wine cabinet.

They were settled in and watching Will and Elizabeth flirt when she felt her phone buzz. She’d put Mary on silent, so she knew that it wasn’t her. She pulled it out without thinking much about who it would be if it wasn’t Mary. She did have other friends, it could have been Marlene or Emmeline.

But it was James.

And she felt thick for not assuming as much.

James: Hey, I have a question for you

Lily: And what is that question?

James: Are you avoiding your room on purpose?

Lily: why would you think that?

While the thought had crossed her mind, how weird it would be now to go in her room and see James, she hadn’t actually been avoiding anything yet. She had been talking to Mary, which required her to have much more space to pace back and forth than her small bedroom had provided. And then she’d been having dinner with her mum.

Lily: I mean, I might later now that I know you’re stalking me

James: I’m not stalking you, I’m just in my room, and it’s very noticeable that you are not in your room

Lily: I think I might have to get my window boarded up

James: What are you up to? Is that a better question?

Lily: Mum and I just finished dinner and we’re watching a movie now

Lily: And yes, that is a much better question.

James: Right, I don’t know what I was thinking before

James: But again, I feel that it is necessary to remind you that I was raised by a pair of spies

Lily: yes, I understand that, but it’s still weird

James: I apologize

Lily: Don’t do that either because that is even weirder.

James: …

James: then I think we’re at a stalemate.

Lily: You understand that I can’t text you much longer without my mum becoming suspicious, right?

James: Does that mean you told her about spending the day with me in a non-date capacity?

Lily: I tell my mum everything, but she and your mum were gossiping earlier. Apparently, your mum called to let my mum know that we’d gone to London for the day

James: Funny. My mum failed to mention that to me. I’ll have to have a talk with her about boundaries and privacy and it will most definitely fall on deaf ears.

Lily: It’s fine. It’s not like I was going to keep any of it a secret anyway. There’s nothing to keep a secret.

James: Right.

Lily: Why does everyone have to be weird about this?

James: About what?

James: You haven’t agreed to anything

James: Unless you’re about to tell me that you’ve changed your mind and that you think dating me sounds like a brilliant idea

Lily: no

James: ouch. You could have softened the blow just a little bit

Lily: It’s not a good idea.

James: mainly because I’m moving to the other side of the world though, right? Not because I’m not handsome and funny and charming and smart

Lily snorted out loud and her mum looked over at her. “Don’t say anything,” Lily said, sinking further into the couch. “He’s just ridiculous is all.”

“I didn’t say anything,” Rose grinned though, and it seemed an awful lot like she was saying something.

Lily: You made me snort and now my mum knows I’m texting you

James: I like that she just assumes that you’re texting me because you were laughing

Lily: No, I just cracked immediately when she looked up at my offending sound

James: I like your snort

Lily: stop

James: nah

James: I told you that I was going to start wooing you once we got back home

Lily: My mum and Mary both laughed when I told them that you keep using that word

James: So, you really are just telling them everything

Lily: I never learned how to keep things to myself

Lily: If someone looks at me too long, I just start speaking to fill the silence

James: Okay, but you didn’t have to tell them that I called it wooing

James: How am I going to look your mum in the eye now?

And so, Lily asked Rose what she should say.

Lily: Mum says not to be too embarrassed because she’s known you your entire life and she’s not surprised anymore

James: You just asked her?

James: Well tell her I said hullo

Lily: She says hullo back

Lily clicked her phone off and took a sip of her wine, turning her attention back to the movie, just in time to see Will and Jack sword fighting in the blacksmith shop. Of course, then her phone buzzed again, and she could hardly pay any attention to the movie.

“The two of you live next door to one another,” Her mum was looking at the screen, but smiling still. “If you want to talk to each other, you could just step outside. You don’t have to pretend that you don’t want to talk to him just because we’re watching a movie that we’ve seen a hundred times.”

“We really do have a thing for pirates, don’t we?”

“We need to diversify our movies though.”

“We could have watched _Stardust_.”

“Oo! We should watch that tomorrow instead of the second one.”

Lily nodded, tapping her fingers on her phone.

“You know I’m not judging you, right? I’m not going to give you a hard time. You’re the only one giving you a hard time.”

Lily scoffed, “Mary MacDonald would love to disagree with you.”

“Okay, but you know that Mary isn’t being serious. She loves you and that’s why she teases you so much.”

“Of course, I know that, and I know that if the situation was reversed, I would be teasing the hell out of her. I’m not mad about it. But I also don’t know how I’m supposed to feel about all of this right now.”

“I understand that. But maybe you don’t have to have it all figured out right now.”

“I told you, that stresses me out.”

“I know. But still,” She shrugged and took a sip of her wine.

They were quiet for a few minutes and then Lily went back to her phone.


	7. Chapter 7

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've got a long chapter for you today! Happy Sunday and happy reading!

Lily woke up the next day with a plan.

She kept her plan simple. She had to revise her resume, and then send it out to at least three agencies.

Simple as it was, it seemed very daunting so she ended up staying in bed for an extra hour and a half so she wouldn’t have to start her day when she woke. And then when she did get up, she decided to make herself a nice breakfast. And then some nice tea. And then the morning paper was on the table and she hadn’t really checked in with what was going on locally in a long time, so she had to be responsible and read a few articles about the local sports teams and elections and the library that she’d practically grown-up in. Apparently, McGonagall and Sprout were overseeing some renovations. She would have to get down there soon to check things out.

And then it was almost noon and she started getting upset with herself for putting off something that really wasn’t going to be all that difficult. All she had to do was proofread something that she had already proofread, and then email it to people who wanted people to send them their resumes.

She took her tea and a stack of Oreos up to her room, leaving her phone in the kitchen, and sat down in front of her computer. She glanced out her window, finding James’ curtains pulled shut, and huffed since he would not be available to distract her.

That was a good thing though. She didn’t need to be distracted right now, she needed to be a grown up and do this very simple task.

She pulled up a few different publishers’ websites that she was interested in working for, went and clicked on their jobs tab in all three before she looked at anything else, and then she bit the bullet (and an Oreo) and started reading the listings.

She opened the jobs that she was qualified for in new tabs and tried to distract herself just enough by daydreaming about what it would be like to finally have a job where she got to work with books all day. She’d had an internship for The Hallows two years ago, so she had a fairly good idea what working in publishing entailed, she knew that she loved the atmosphere and how excited everyone got about upcoming books and literary events. What she didn’t’ know, was why The Hallows hadn’t offered her a job at the end of summer. They had offered a job to the girl Lily had spent the summer working with, the girl Lily had taught how to use the phones.

But it was fine.

She was going to get an even better job.

Or, a job, at the very least.

One that was in her field.

And hopefully not too far from her mum. Preferably.

After she got into the rhythm of things, and after she’d threaten to toss her laptop out the window if it continued to load slowly, it was nearly five and she had done far more than she had set out to do.

There were no responses yet, but she had sent her resume out to quite a few places, applying for many different jobs within the same companies and she figured that at least one of them would call her within the week.

TAP

Lily jumped and turned toward her window. James’ curtains were open now, and he was standing in front of his window with his arms crossed over his chest.

Lily closed her laptop, feeling accomplished. She walked over to her window to find out why James looked like he was upset with her.

She pulled her window open and leaned against the frame. “I thought you said you were done throwing rocks at my window?”

“Well, I had to get your attention somehow.”

Lily nodded. “I thought we agreed that you doing anything at all to get my attention was what caused all of our problems when we were kids.”

“All of our problems?” He raised his brow and Lily shrugged. “I texted you a couple times about dinner. Are you really trying to stand me up? Somewhere I can see you?”

Lily snorted. “I’m not standing you up. I’ve been looking for jobs all afternoon and I had to leave my phone in the kitchen so that I didn’t just watch TikToks all day instead. Are you ready to eat now? Because now that I’m thinking about food, I don’t think I ever ate lunch and I’m very hungry.”

James ran a hand through his hair and held up his phone. “I’m ready when you are, which you would know if you’d at least checked your phone.” He was teasing her, and she couldn’t pretend that she didn’t like it.

“Well I’m sorry that I was being a responsible adult!” She shook her head and then closed her window.

She had never gotten dressed that morning, so she had to find some clothes to throw on. She refused to let herself think about what she was putting on past, ‘does this look good with that,’ because this wasn’t a date. She wasn’t going to start dating someone that was moving less than two weeks.

Not only was he moving, but he was joining a football team that would take him all over England. He would be meeting new people and going new places and he wouldn’t have time for her.

Lily huffed as she shoved her foot into a trainer, because she knew that wasn’t a good reason to not date someone. If he had proven that he wasn’t going to make time for her that would be one thing, but projecting problems that hadn’t come up, was not good and it made great opportunities turn sour.

She needed to stop doing that.

She needed to just… live in the moment, or some cliché shit like that.

She didn’t know how to do that, but she was excited to see James, and that seemed like a good first step.

She walked out her front door and he was standing on her porch with a single daisy. He held it out to her, and she started laughing. She didn’t mean to start laughing, but it was entirely ridiculous that James was standing on her front porch holding out a single daisy for her.

“Again, I’d appreciate a bit more subtlety in your rejections. At least until I build up a thicker skin,” His arm sagged a bit, but he was smiling so she knew that she hadn’t done real damage.

She took the flower. “I was just thinking, before I walked out here, how weird it is to be spending time with you and not dreading it. To not feel the need to be cautious about whether or not you’re going to be a prat, or try and explain to me why I’m wrong about everything. And then I walk out and you’re holding out a flower,” She laughed again, twirling the flower stem between her fingers. “The Lily of forty-eight hours ago would not have believed this to be possible.”

“Well, the James and Lily of forty-eight hours ago had a lot to learn.” James shrugged.

“They were so young,” Lily put a hand over her heart. “Naïve, even.”

“Bit thick in the head, really.”

“Speak for yourself, sir.” Lily skipped off her porch and started toward the concrete. “We’re walking, right?”

“I assumed we would.” He nodded, following after her.

Lily looked at the small white petals on her flower and then over at James. He was smiling at her, like he knew how much she liked that he had just handed her this one small flower. She scrunched her nose. “Stop it.”

“Nah,” He repeated what he’d said in his text last night and then raked his hand through his hair.

“I used to hate it when you did that,” She said, and he raised a brow.

“When I said ‘nah?’” His brow was furrowed, and he had no right to look that cute while confused. Lily was quickly losing ground here when it came to not agreeing to date this boy.

“No, when you messed your hair up like that. I think it’s more of a nervous tick now, but you used to do it in secondary all the time to make yourself look cool and I did not like it.”

“To look cool?” James laughed, “You were just jealous.”

“Jealous?” Lily laughed as well, reaching up to pull her hair tie from her hair. “I don’t think so, love. Look at all this hair. It’s fabulous. I could be Princess Merida if I wanted to.”

James reached out and tucked her hair back behind her ear, as casually as if he did it all the time and Lily bit the tip of her tongue to keep from overreacting. She tilted her head at him. “I didn’t mean that you were jealous of my hair.” And there was that glint in his eye. “I meant you were jealous that you didn’t get to run your hands through it.”

Lily held his gaze for a second and then shrugged. “I’ve heard less believable theories.” He might have been right. Though teenage Lily might have just been mad about it because it was something that James did, and she was good at finding things that James did, that she could be upset about.

They walked in silence for a little while, a tension filled, slightly awkward silence that made Lily think that she shouldn’t have said what she’d said.

And then James started laughing.

Lily raised her brows as she turned to look at him. “I’m sorry,” He shook his head and tried to stop laughing. “I just can’t believe that you just agreed with me.”

Lily clicked her tongue. “Let’s not be rash, I didn’t agree with you. I just said that there were more outlandish theories.”

“I know, I know,” He nodded, and then he was poking her in the side, and she was shuffling sideways to get out of his reach. “But still, you didn’t shut me down because you used to fancy me, Evans! How cute is that?”

Lily blinked at him for a moment and then laughed, “Are you drunk right now?”

“Maybe,” He took a deep breath and shoved his hands in his pockets. “To be perfectly honest with you-“

“What were you being before?”

“I have felt a bit intoxicated since we got in the car yesterday.” He looked over at her with that crooked smile that had pulled her in three days ago. When he’d tossed his number through her window via paper airplane. She felt the butterflies act up and crossed her arms over her chest.

“That doesn’t sound safe. Seeing as how you were driving us.”

“I wasn’t intoxicated.” He pointed out, needlessly, and while he continued to smile at her.

“This is ridiculous.”

“Completely,” He agreed, which only threw Lily again.

“Yes, but I think you and I are referring to different things.”

“Maybe, but we’re still agreeing instead of arguing so, I think that’s a point in our favor.”

“I was referring to-“ But then he was cutting her off.

“I thought a lot about what you said yesterday before we had lunch. And I think you’re right.”

Lily’s heart froze in her chest. She was quite sure that it had literally froze, in her chest. What part of what she said did he think she was right about? Because the crux of what she had said, was that they shouldn’t date one another. Was that what he was agreeing with?

If so, she shouldn’t feel this sense of dread creeping over her. Because she had said it first. Because not dating was the sensible thing to do.

Or to not do.

Even if him saying it now meant that he had seen enough of her in the last twenty-four hours to know that he wasn’t interested in her romantically any more, that maybe he never was-

She was spiraling and she needed to stop and just ask him what he meant.

The boy had shown up at her doorstep and gave her a flower, he wasn’t about to tell her that he was no longer interested.

Logically she could grasp that.

But her brain had never been great at being logical when it came to James.

“Oh yeah?” She asked, forcing herself to take a slow, deep breath. “What part of what I said do you suddenly agree with? Taking over the confectionary?” Did making a joke there make her seem too obvious? What exactly was she being obvious about? Was James somehow reading her mind just then, hearing all the logic-free rambling that her brain was doing?

No. That was ridiculous. James couldn’t read minds. No one could, hopefully.

It didn’t feel good to think that he’d changed his mind about her so quickly and she wished that he would just spit out what he agreed with already. But he was just walking along beside her, his hands still in his pockets and a thoughtful look on his face. She wanted to shake him.

And on top of all of that going on in her brain, Mary’s suggestion kept jumping out at her too. Which was basically to just snog him.

Thoughtful advice was not Mary’s strong suite.

“Well, I agree that we don’t really know each other anymore… Or maybe we never really knew each other that well.” Did he notice her sigh of relief? Did she notice her own sigh of relief, because what the hell did that mean? She shouldn’t want him to want to date her if she didn’t want to date him. That hardly seemed fair. “And while I think that dating someone is a really good way to get to know them, I understand that you might not be comfortable with that.”

She tilted her head to the side, rolling the daisy stem between her fingers. “And?”

“And, I figured that tonight, we should get to know one another.” He smiled at her and she started laughing, spilling her relief and a slew of heavy and complicated thoughts out. His smile grew and a few more of her loud thoughts started to fade away.

“Oh?” She was still laughing, and he was smiling at her as though she wasn’t about to make fun of him. “Is that what you’ve decided? That we can just get to know each other tonight?”

“I mean, we made good headway yesterday, I believe, but I plan to know all kinds of things about you after tonight.” He nodded, his eyes looked as though they were sparkling. He knew he was being ridiculous, and he was enjoying it. He was enjoying her enjoyment.

“Okay,” She let out a breath and shrugged her shoulders. “And what do you want to know first?”

“Well, we have to start somewhere easy,” James looked in front of them, clapping his hands together. “Why is your favorite color yellow?”

She wasn’t surprised that he knew her favorite color, but she did get a burst of excitement at the phrasing of the question. She nodded her head, “Okay, so, that is not an easy question and you’re definitely not going to want to spend the rest of the evening with me if I tell you the truth.”

James laughed, sounding almost victorious, “Well now you must tell me!”

Lily looked up at the dimming sky as she told him. “I feel like yellow will be sad if I pick a new favorite color.” He started laughing, like she knew he would, and she realized that she quite liked making him laugh. Some buzzing of her earlier thoughts started to come back, but James interrupted them.

“You think the color yellow will get sad?”

“Of course I do! I mean, I’ve been very devoted to the color yellow for almost my entire life. I flirted with purple for a bit when I was four, but then I was with yellow from then on out. I can’t just change my mind now. That would be rude.” He continued to laugh, and she smiled as she watched his face.

He nodded, “I’ve never had the same favorite color for more than a few months.”

“Well then you don’t know at all what I’m talking about. What is your favorite color now?”

“Okay, well green has almost always been one of my favorite colors, but I also never have just had one favorite color.”

“What are your other favorite colors then?”

“Red.”

“Your favorite colors are green and red?” She snorted. “So, Christmas?”

His ears were slightly red, which made Lily think that she was missing something, but he shrugged. “I do thrive in a good ugly sweater.”

“Christmas jumpers are my favorite.” Lily agreed. “Alright, what’s the next question.” She could see the diner now. There was a group of teenagers out front, having taken their food to go, only to eat in the parking lot. This is what all the neighborhood teens had been doing as long as Lily could remember. It is what she had done with Severus and Petunia and Gwen when they were teenagers. Mary was the only one that ever wanted to eat inside, and that was probably because she didn’t live in the neighborhood.

“When was your first date?”

Lily looked away from the group, who were tossing fries back and forth, trying to catch them in their mouths. “My first date was when I was… fourteen?”

“Are you asking me?”

“No,” She snorted. “I was fourteen. It was with Bertram Aubrey and his mum drove us to the ice cream shop near the movie theater and dropped us off. It was extremely awkward, and I dropped my ice cream on my white converse and could never get the stain out.”

“So an overall winning experience?” James walked up to the crosswalk and held out his hand to Lily. “We’re about to cross the street, Lily.” He said when she narrowed her eyes. “Safety first.”

“When was your first date?” She asked, debating whether or not she should just start walking across the road, or if she should just take his hand. “Everly, right?”

“It’s so weird to me that you know that.” He was still holding out his hand.

She took it, but she made sure to roll her eyes while she did it.

He didn’t seem to mind the eyeroll.

“Yes, Everly was the first girl that I went out with. I was fifteen and I did not want my mum to be involved at all, for obvious reasons,” Lily nodded as he led her across the street, his hand warm around hers. It was a bit unnerving how natural it felt to hold his hand. “We went to the skate park, which was stupid because my idea was to impress her and it didn’t occur to me that the most advanced thing I could do on a skate board was, not fall off.” Lily laughed, squeezing his hand as they stepped up off the road.

“I would have been impressed. At fifteen, I had watched Mary nearly split her skull in two because she was unable to not fall off. Girl went through three different helmets before her mum took her skateboard away.”

He was grinning. “I mean, I might be underselling what a talent that is. I can still not fall off.”

Lily smiled. “While moving or just when you stand on it?”

“I don’t think we need any more details.” James ran his free hand through his hair and then he was holding the door open for her and letting go of her hand. She was not _not_ disappointed at the loss of contact.

“Sorry, I didn’t mean to pry.”

“No worries.” He waved her off and she laughed again.

They walked into the diner and Lily felt a wave of nostalgia roll over her again. She hadn’t been here since last summer most likely. When Mary had come to visit and they got chocolate shakes with the red and white, striped, paper straws.

She took a deep breath and was glad to find that it smelled exactly the same as it always had. Like vinyl seats, grease, and chips.

“Booth or counter?” James asked, walking in behind her.

“Booth,” He nodded and then his hand was on her lower back and he was leading her across the diner, toward the corner booth where she had seen him, and his mates sit many times.

His hand on her back was only slightly distracting.

Lily slid in on one side and James on the other. Lily folded her hands-on top of the table after setting the daisy to the side and James grinned at her.

“What?” She asked, raising her brows.

James shook his head, “I’ve been imagining this for years now. Sitting across from you in this exact booth.”

Lily bit the tip of her tongue and narrowed her eyes slightly. She didn’t want to admit that she used to think about that very same thing. Though, he wasn’t speaking in past tense.

“What can I get for the two of you?” A waitress by the name of Dell handed them a pair of menus and then pulled out her notepad. “Or do you need a minute?”

Lily shook her head. “I think I’m good to order. You?” She asked James.

“I’m ready,” He nodded.

Lily ordered a chicken sandwich, chips, and a strawberry shake. James ordered a burger, crisps and a coke and then Dell walked off.

“I think it’s my turn to ask you a question now.” Lily said, tapping her fingers against the table. James crossed his arms and leaned against the table.

“I think you are right.” He nodded, and Lily really liked hearing him say that.

She hummed for a minute while she thought over what she should ask him. “Why didn’t you order a shake?”

James laughed, “Somehow I knew that you were going to ask me that.” Lily shrugged, not upset that he found her question predictable. “I used to order a malt whenever I came here, but since they took it off their menu, I haven’t been inclined to order a frozen dessert, lest they decide to stop serving that as well.”

Lily snorted and then started laughing. “You’re pouting? You’re depriving yourself of a really good shake, to pout?”

James shook his head, looking far more serious than he had any right to. “No, listen, I’m doing this for everyone else.”

“Oh? Please explain.”

“Of course.” He slipped up, and the corner of his mouth betrayed him. He schooled his features and pressed on, “If I start getting a shake, and decide that I love it and it’s the greatest thing ever, like I did with the chocolate malt, then they’ll take it off their menu and no one will ever be able to have it again.”

Lily slowly shook her head. “I can’t tell if that’s egocentric or just dumb, but I’m sure that all the people here appreciate your sacrifice, James.”

“It’s not egocentric, because the people here don’t know that I’m making this sacrifice for them. I do this, not for the appreciation, but just for the general good of the public.”

Lily snorted again and shook her head. Dell came back with their order and Lily pulled her shake toward her, taking a drink through the red and white, striped, paper straw. “Well, I’m glad that the fate of the neighborhood doesn’t depend on me not getting to drink a shake, because I would not be able to exercise such control.”

“Yes well, you are lucky that I am willing.” James picked up a crisp and shoved it into his mouth. “My next question for you, is… are you unpacked yet?”

Lily tilted her head. “Interesting question,”

“I’m trying to get to know you. Are you the kind of person who can leave boxes full of stuff in the middle of your room for days on end, or did you empty them all and put it all away?”

She nodded, “Right. Well, I unpacked everything except my books. And I would have unpacked those, but the bookshelf in my room is too small, and so I don’t really have anywhere to put them. But everything else is unpacked! I was worried if I put it off any longer, I would trip and hurt myself during one of my hairband rehearsals.” James laughed.

“I’m forever grateful that I’ve had a front row seat to so many of your performances.”

Lily shook her head and stuffed chips into her mouth. “The fact that you’ve seen me dance around my room more than once is sort of mortifying.”

“No,” James shook his head. “Your dance moves are mighty impressive.”

They continued to eat and ask each other questions back and forth until the daisy on the table was getting wilted, and Lily was debating asking for a glass of water for it. She probably would have if she knew that James wasn’t going to be smug about it. But she knew the opposite of that, he would most definitely be smug, so she just had to let the poor thing wilt.

When he wasn’t looking, she slipped it into her sweater pocket.

It was still light out when they left the diner, as the sun didn’t set until after nine this time of year. Lily was surprised to find that it was half past seven when she checked her watch.

“We were in there for two hours?” She raised her brow.

“I know,” James nudged her elbow with his own. “Time just sort of melts away when we’re together, huh?”

Lily looked at the concrete in front of her and pursed her lips. “I mean, I sort of set you up for that one by being so genuinely surprised.”

“Doesn’t mean that it’s not true.” He shrugged. “Let’s walk back through the park.” It was the longer way to get back to their houses, and he didn’t really give her a chance to say no. He just reached out and took her hand, leading her across the street, and heading into the park instead of turning right.

Lily would have answered if she hadn’t been distracted by his hand on hers again.

And he didn’t let go this time. There were no doors to open in the park, and so he didn’t have a reason to let go.

She tried to tell herself that she shouldn’t care much one way or the other.

The sixteen-year-old in her told her to shut the fuck up and enjoy it.

After all, she was trying to live in the moment or some shit.

Which meant that she was most definitely allowed to like holding James’ hand.

“You got quiet on me,” James said, letting their arms swing lightly as they walked along the paved path. The path circled all the way around the park, but it also split off going back toward the neighborhood after a ways.

Lily shrugged the arm that wasn’t attached to the hand he was holding, some part of her worried that if she drew any attention to their conjoined hands, he’d remember that they were holding hands and let go.

She knew that was a ridiculous thought even as she was having it though, because he was the one who had come up with the reason that they needed to hold hands in the first place. He was the one who had taken hold of her hand.

He was probably just as aware as she was that they were holding hands.

“Very quiet.” He commented, looking at her as they walked. “What are you thinking about?”

Lily shook her head. “Quiet doesn’t have to be a bad thing.”

“No, it doesn’t.” James agreed, brushing his thumb over the back of her hand, and unless he did that absentmindedly, he most definitely knew they were holding hands. “Are you quiet because I’m holding your hand?”

Okay maybe James could read her mind.

“That might have something to do with it, but not however you’re thinking.” She sighed. They had been nothing but honest with each other since yesterday, so she didn’t see why she couldn’t try and keep that up. To a point anyway, she didn’t want to let him know exactly how out of it she felt.

James chuckled at her response. “It’s not how I’m thinking? So you don’t want me to let go of your hand then?”

Lily almost squeezed his hand at the suggestion. “If I wanted you to let go of my hand, I would simply take my hand back.”

“Right,” James was smirking. She wasn’t looking at him, because she didn’t want to see the smirk, but she knew that it was there. She could hear it in his voice. “But that brings me back to my original question, though I’d like to alter it slightly. What is it that you’re thinking about in relation to holding my hand?”

Lily let out a reluctant laugh and looked over at James. He wasn’t smirking, not really. The smile he wore was more boyish and happy than cocky and sure.

“I can’t really get my brain to make sense, if you must know.” She said, using her free hand to tuck her hair behind her ear. “But,” She sucked in a breath. “I like holding your hand.”

“Is that the part that doesn’t make sense to you?’ He teased.

She looked over at him. “No, James. I fancied you when we were kids too, remember? I’m not surprised to find out that I like holding your hand.”

“I still can’t believe that you liked me,” He shook his head.

“Yes, and I’m still having a hard time believing that you liked me as well.”

James continued to shake his head and Lily was quite sure that a bunch of ‘what if’ scenarios were playing through his head again.

And so she decided to go that route, instead of trying to explain what she had actually been thinking about. How do you even going about telling someone that you weren’t sure if they were aware they were holding your hand anyway?

“This is what we would have done, yeah? If either one of us had got our shit together and worked out that we shouldn’t have been shouting at one another so much?” James laughed and squeezed her hand. She wasn’t sure if she was imagining it or not, but they seemed to be standing closer to one another now.

“Yeah, I guess we would have done this quite a lot.” He nodded, looking over at her with that lopsided grin of his. The one that had convinced her to wake up twenty minutes earlier than she wanted to on school days so she could attempt to tame her curls so that he might notice. Wild. “I’m glad that we get to do it now.” They were starting down the dirt path now, leaving the park and heading toward their houses.

Lily felt her insides warm and she nodded, “I’m glad too.”

They continued down the path quietly and this time the quiet felt comfortable.

Lily still interrupted it anyway, because it was her turn to ask a question, “What are you thinking?”

He looked over at her just as their houses came into view. First James’ and then hers. Her mum’s car was parked in the driveway now.

James shrugged, looking away now. “I’m just trying to come up with another way we can get to know each other better. Do you like roller skating?”

“Not even a little bit,” James laughed.

“I’ve learned so much about you this evening.”

“Do you like roller skating?”

James shrugged. “I don’t know. I haven’t been since I was maybe twelve? Sirius kept checking me into the wall, so it wasn’t like, the best time.” Lily laughed. “I’ll have to think of something else.” Then he looked at her again, as though he just remembered something. “Assuming that you’d like to continue getting to know me,” His comment lacked the cheek that should have come with it.

“Can’t you just say ‘hang out?’” Lily tilted her head to the side. The sun was starting to set now, and the porch light of the house they were walking past came on, causing James to be silhouetted. She couldn’t see his eyes anymore, but his smile was still there.

“Right, sorry. Do you think we could hang out again?”

Lily bit the tip of her tongue and repeated that line about living in the moment to herself again. “I like hanging out with you, so yes.”

James squeezed her hand again. “Brilliant.”

“Something like that,” She agreed.

He didn’t try and kiss her. But she didn’t try and kiss him either, so she couldn’t really be too disappointed.

When she got back to her room, she pulled an old encyclopedia off her bookshelf and flipped it open. There were random pressed flowers throughout the book, and she’d written in sharpie the dates that she’d pressed the flowers and where she’d found them or who had given them to her.

She pulled a sharpie out of her desk drawer and flipped to a clear section of the book. She reached into her pocket, pulled out the wilted daisy, and carefully placed it on the page. She wrote the date at the top of the page and James Potter’s name underneath it.

But she wasn’t cliche about it, so there wasn’t a heart.

The heart was implied.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm giving you all two chapters today, since this chapter felt a bit like filler. Cute, fluffy filler, but still filler <3  
> Enjoy

Lily let herself sleep in the next morning, partially because she had put in an honest effort with the job hunt yesterday so she felt she deserved it, and partially because she could not be assed to get out of bed. She had stayed up much too late last night overthinking things that she told herself she didn’t need to overthink. She had spent quite a long-time texting Mary, and then her mum had come in to ask her how things went, and Lily had trapped her for far longer than Rose had been prepared to be in Lily’s room.

It was eleven thirty when Mary called her, and her stomach remembered that it needed substance to survive.

“What’s up, Mary?” Lily asked, swinging her legs out of bed and running a hand through her hair. It was quite knotted. She’d need to take a shower after she ate something.

“I’m on my lunch break, so I thought I’d call you and tell you who I just saw.”

Lily racked her brain for who Mary could have seen in the middle of nowhere Ireland, but Mary didn’t give her time to come to her own conclusions.

“Reggie!” She squealed, and Lily was not sure who she was talking about.

“What is he famous for?”

“What? No, he’s not famous, not all of us are interested in international football stars, Lily.” Which was rich coming from Mary, who had spent most of her life very interested in international football stars.

“Is that what James is? And I didn’t know that you were telling me about a boy you fancied, I thought you were telling me about someone famous you saw at work.”

“I don’t see famous people here, only Gerdie, the eighty-year-old weather woman. She’s quickly bumping you out of your best friend slot, just so you know.”

“I’m not afraid to throw hands with an eighty-year-old.”

“I know, I know, but I’d have to defend her. She made me pumpkin bread! How sweet is that?”

“Do you need me to bake something for you?” Lily smiled. She missed her best friend. “No, wait, we’re talking about Reggie.”

“Yes, Reggie. He was in our maths class. He was the TA though, not a student. I mean, he’s our age, but he was in like some obscure, stupid difficult maths class at the time.”

“Okay, I do remember you being quite into the TA from our maths class. What is he doing in Ireland?”

“He lives here!” Mary laughed. “Turns out, he grew up a couple streets over from where my Granda lives. How crazy is that?”

Lily smiled. “Wishing you would have spent those summers wandering around outside instead of sulking in your room, now?”

“No, being outside for extended lengths of time is terrible,” Mary quickly argued. “But it’s wild to think that we could have run into each other at the store or something. Anyway, I asked him for coffee, and I’m on my way to meet him right now.”

“Mary!” Lily shrieked happily.

“Yes, I know! And don’t worry, if we fall in love and get married, I will make him move closer to you. I haven’t told him this yet of course, but there is no way I’m going to end up less than driving distance from you.”

“What about Gerdie?”

Mary laughed. “I’ve already told Gerdie that she can move in with me if she wants. She told me, ‘no thank you, I quite like the quiet life I’ve got.’ I love that batty old lady so much.”

“Well I’m glad that you remembered me while fantasizing about the future you’re going to have with a boy you just met!”

“I didn’t just meet him! But I do see him now, and he’s waving so I’m going to have to hang up on you. God almighty, look at that boy's smile. I love you, Lily!”

Lily laughed, “I love you too! Have fun!” Mary squealed, hopefully not loud enough for Reggie to hear, and then hung up the phone. Lily shook her head and slid her phone into her pocket as she pulled open the fridge.

Mary had always enjoyed dating, while Lily had, for the most part, tolerated it. She would not enjoy going out to coffee with someone she had only talked to once four years ago, but Mary had always been more sociable than she was. Lily had always preferred to date someone that she knew.

She didn’t have to be friends with them, per say, but if someone came up and gave her their number in a pub because they saw her across the way, she wouldn’t text them. If she started talking to someone in line at the shop and they asked for her number, she would politely decline. She needed a little bit of the groundwork to be covered before she was comfortable with the idea of dating someone.

She had met Anthony, the only serious boyfriend she’d had, during her second year of uni. And she had known that she fancied him after the first time they had hung out with mutual friends, they hadn’t started dating until their third year.

Mary had never been like that. She would frequently take numbers she was handed at bars or out in shops. Dating was something fun and, for the most part, casual for Mary. It had always seemed so much easier for her friend, and Lily was a bit envious of that.

Especially now, given her current circumstances.

Not that she didn’t know James. She’d known him since they were five and he dipped her braid into a gluepot, since they were four and their dads rigged up a sprinkler ‘water park’ for the two of them, and Petunia, to play on the grass between their driveways. Since they were three and the Potters had agreed to babysit Lily while her mum and dad rushed Petunia to the doctors after she’d fallen off the slide and broke her arm.

She’d always known him. But now there were new layers to that. She definitely felt like she knew him better now than she ever had before.

No, that wasn’t what was holding her back, even if she’d told James that it was while they were in London. She was mainly held up by the fact that he would be gone in just under two weeks.

And also the fact that it was James. That was holding her back as well, and it would be much harder to explain to James.

She pulled a peach out of the fridge and took a bite as she closed it. She should drive out and get some coffee. She could use a good cup of coffee this morning, though it was dangerously close to not being morning anymore.

She was tossing her peach pit into the compost bin and deciding if she wanted to shower before or after she got coffee, when there was a knock on the door.

She checked her phone to see if her mum had texted her about someone coming over to drop something off, because when she peeked out the peephole, there was a large rectangle blocking the view of most of the porch.

Nothing from her mum. She pulled open the door and looked around. The rectangle turned out to be a bookshelf. And James and Sirius were standing off to the side.

“Lo, red!” Sirius grinned at her.

“Sirius,” Lily smiled back. “James,” He nodded, also smiling. “What is this?”

“A bookshelf!” He looked so proud of himself. “So you can unpack all of your books.”

She narrowed her eyes slightly. “James, when I told you that, I wasn’t asking you-”

“I know!” He interrupted, holding up his hands. “And I didn’t go out and buy this or anything, it was just sitting in my room, unutilized. And since I wasn’t using it, I thought you might want to.”

“Which, you better want to, because it was a pain in the ass to lug over here.” Sirius said. “Now open the door so we can bring it all the way in.”

“If you want it,” James said quickly, giving his friend a look.

Lily looked between the two of them and Sirius nodded at her. She shrugged. “Alright, thank you! I really could use it.” She pulled the door open all the way and got out of their way as they moved to pick it up.

It didn’t actually appear to be that heavy, as they maneuvered it up the stairs without much difficulty at all, and then, for the first time ever, James Potter and Sirius Black were in her bedroom.

It was a little surreal.

James seemed to be of the same mind, because he looked around and then glanced out the window, toward his own room. “Well this is a little strange,” He said, his hand buried in his hair.

“Come on, James,” Sirius shook his head. “Don’t let her know that you’ve never been in a girl’s room before.”

“Oh shove off,” James laughed. “It’s just weird being in here. I mean,” He spun around and pointed at the NSYNC poster that half the school thought she’d snogged because of him, “I’ve seen that poster a million times, but not from this angle.”

“A million times?” Lily raised her brows.

“That does sound a tad creepy, James,” Sirius agreed.

“You know what I mean,” James sighed, looking at Lily.

“Yes, it’s very strange to see you standing in my room,” Lily said, and then she looked at Sirius. “Though, it’s just as weird for you to be here.”

Sirius smiled at her. “I have to agree with you. I also don’t make a habit of frequenting girls’ bedrooms.”

Lily smiled, though she didn’t bring up Benjy. James reached out and shoved his shoulder.

“Is this the point where I offer you both a cold beverage now?” She looked over the new shelf, quite excited to get started organizing her books now. She hated leaving them in boxes.

“No,” Sirius grinned. “This is the point where James asks you if you’re busy later.” He gave her a mock salute and then left her room. James laughed and shook his head.

Lily looked at him with brows raised.

“I mean, that is what I’m about to do, but he didn’t need to leave. He’s in on the plans.” His hand raked through his hair. “A group of us are going out to the pub tonight, would you like to join us?”

Lily tilted her head to the side. “When you say, ‘a group of us…”

“No, it’s not just, Sirius, Remus and Peter.” He laughed again. He seemed to be in an awfully good mood. “I mean, they will be there, for sure, but Benjy is gonna be there, and Dorcas and Marlene are in town for Nick’s wedding, so they’ll be there.”

“I forgot that Marlene was in town!” Lily clapped her hands together and James’ smile grew.

“And Kingsley said he might be able to stop by-”

“James, you don’t need to entice me into going out to the pub.” She interrupted him, even if she didn’t want to spend more time with him and his friends, she would have gone now that she knew Marlene would be there. “What time?”

He was trying not to let his smile get as big as it wanted to be, and knowing that made the butterflies in Lily’s stomach freak out a little bit.

“I can pick you up at six?”

“Six? So early?”

“Well, we’re adults now, so we’re getting dinner too.” James crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against her NSYNC poster. “Some of the lads can’t stay too late.”

“Well I can’t go at six,” She said, refraining from stomping her foot. “Mum and I are going to my gran’s this evening, my dad’s mum. She called me the day before I got home and asked us over for dinner. Mum is getting off work early and everything.”

“It’s a four o’clock dinner?” James didn’t look disappointed.

“Yes, it’s a four o’clock dinner.” Lily laughed. “But I can meet you all at the pub afterward? I mean, I can’t pretend that we won’t be there for a while. But just because we’re adults now, doesn’t mean you’ll all be calling it a night early, right?”

“No, of course not.” James shook his head. “No, there’s already been talk of billiards tournaments. We’ll be there all night.”

Lily nodded, “Good. Mary is going to be so jealous.”

James laughed at her, “How is Mary?”

“Good. She’s on a date right now with our TA from the only maths class we took in uni. I told her I remembered who he was, but I can not picture his face.” She shrugged. “She sounded really excited though.”

“So maybe she won’t be too jealous.”

“Marlene and Dorcas are going to be there, of course she’ll be jealous.” Her phone buzzed in her pocket and she pulled it out to see that she had a text from Marlene. “Speaking of Marlene,” She smiled.

“Well you should tell Mary to come and visit,”

“I will, but I’ve got to give her more than a week to get settled before I pull her back home. I hate that we don’t live together anymore,” She unlocked her phone and read Marlene’s text.

Marlene: Hey? Just a question, out of nothing other than curiosity, are you ready to get trashed tonight?

Lily: I’d be hard pressed to name a night that I wouldn’t be ready to get trashed

Marlene: Excellent. We’re all meeting up at Ernie’s Pub for dinner and then to get trashed. Apparently Black is bringing someone??

Lily: I have been informed

Lily: James and Sirius are both in my house presently

Lily: Prepare to have your ass handed to you when we play billiards

Marlene: In your house?????

Marlene: And any excuse to touch my ass. Careful or Dory will get jealous

Lily snorted and put her phone away, not wanting to answer her question about James while he was standing in front of her.

When she looked up at him, he was still leaning against her poster, smiling at her.

“What?”

“Nothing.” He shrugged. “I just like this new dynamic we’ve got going.”

Lily pressed her lips together. “It’s definitely better than it was.” He nodded. “Alright, get out of my house now, I need to go and get coffee so that I’ll have the energy to do something about my hair.” She tugged at the end of a tendril that was trying to be a curl and then started shooing him out of her room.

“Excuse you, I thought we were being offered a cold drink? Now you’re kicking us out?” But he was already out the door and heading for the stairs.

“I’m sure Sirius already helped himself to whatever he wanted.” Lily said, peeking around to see if she could spot Sirius in the kitchen. She could. He was sitting at the kitchen table with a bowl of cereal and a mug of tea. She laughed. “I’m glad you made yourself at home, dove.”

“Had to, didn’t I? You two were taking forever up there.” He picked up his tea, his pinkie sticking up in the air. “Marlene texted me for information, Lily.”

“What kind of information?” James asked, narrowing his brow.

“Oh, I don’t know. Do you know, Lily?”

Lily blinked at him a few times and then sighed. “I don’t know why people think they can embarrass me.” She looked at James. “I told Marlene that you and Sirius were in my house. She wants to know why.”

Sirius clicked his tongue and set his tea down. “You didn’t even blush.”

“No, I didn’t. She asked me for some other information too.”

“She can meet Benjy when she meets him,” He shrugged his shoulder, though it wasn’t as nonchalantly as he wanted it to be. She didn’t want to make him uncomfortable though, even if he’d just been trying to make her blush about James, so she turned around to ask James something, but her question disappeared when she saw that he was at the counter making himself a cup of tea as well.

“What are you doing?”

“Well, I can’t leave now! Who would watch Sirius?”

Lily looked back at Sirius, who had picked up the paper and did not look as though he was going to move any time soon. “Such odd blokes.”

“Are you sure you don’t want tea instead of coffee?” James said, offering her, her own tea. She took it, mainly because she had to do nothing to it, since he’d just fixed it.

She took a seat across from Sirius, ‘accidentally’ knocking her feet against his.

He looked up from the paper. “His name is Benjy.”

“Yes, you’ve mentioned that.” She blew on her tea before taking a tiny sip.

“He’s a nice boy. Tell Marlene to be nice to him.”

“Like you were nice to Dorcas? Or Frank when Alice started bringing him around?” She turned to James, “Have you talked to them recently?”

“I talked to Alice a couple weeks ago,” He shrugged. “Her and Frank are on vacation in Canada. Skiing I think.”

“Okay, yes, I know I have a history of giving people a hard time,” Sirius said, drawing her attention back to him. “But Benjy might not know that.”

“I’m sure he does. I mean, he’s met you, yes?”

Sirius sighed, “Lily.”

“Sirius.” They looked at one another across the table for a minute before James joined them.

“Sirius, no one is going to be mean to Benjy.” James said, and it sounded as though he’d made this claim many times recently.

“I might,” Lily shrugged. James clicked his tongue and nudged her.

“I carried that bookshelf up the stairs for you!” Sirius put the paper down now and leaned forward. “And I heated up the water for our tea!”

“You carried the bookshelf for James, and you stole my tea!”

Sirius smirked and leaned back in his chair. “I actually carried the bookshelf for myself. Figured he’d shut up about you for ten minutes if you were standing right in front of him.”

“And now I’m threatening to bully someone I’ve never met before,” Lily pushed her hair back.

“You don’t know how to bully someone.” Sirius scoffed. “I’m really only worried about McKinnon.” And then out of the blue, “Did you really like James in secondary?”

James choked on his tea and Lily looked over at him with raised brows.

“I’m not apologizing for telling him,” James said, once he could breathe again. “You told your mum I was trying to ‘woo’ you.”

“Okay, but you, unironically, used the word multiple times.”

“It was a little ironic.”

“No it wasn’t.” Lily and Sirius said this at the same time and James looked a bit mortified. Perhaps he was wondering if having Sirius and Lily in the same room together was a good idea for him. Lily had never interacted with Sirius that much. He had always been around, he joined in on James’ antics that involved her on occasion, like waking her up at three in the morning by throwing stones at her window. But this was the most the two of them had ever talked.

She kind of liked Sirius so far.

“Yes, I did fancy James when we were kids. That seems to be the main reason he’s so keen on getting me to agree to go out with him now.”

Sirius cleared his throat and sat up straighter. “Sure, yes, but have you considered that James is much different now that he is an adult? He is responsible and better looking in my opinion. He also has very nice abs I’ve been told-”

“Shut up, you blighter! You know that’s not what I meant when I asked you to talk me up.” Lily started laughing. James’ ears were bright red and that just made Lily laugh more.

Lily didn’t hear the car pull up, but the front door opened and then Rose was standing in the kitchen entry. “Afternoon, everyone,” She grinned, setting her keys and take away bags on the counter. “I got us something light to eat, Lily. To hold us over til we go to Anita’s.”

Lily nodded. “Thanks, mum.”

Rose nodded, “Sirius, I haven’t seen you in a while. How are you doing?”

“Well, I can’t complain I suppose. But Lily is trying to bully me.”

“Is she now?”

“She’s doing a very poor job of it, but yes, and she’s not blushing when I tease her for fancying James.” James reached over and knocked him on the back of his head. “Excuse me, I meant, when they were kids. She fancied James, when they were kids.”

“Sounds like you might have been teasing each other.”

“That was most definitely what was going on here.” James nodded.

“Though we were also teasing James,” Sirius took another drink of his tea.

“Yes,” Lily agreed. “It felt good to team up on him.”

“It really did,” Sirius nodded. He picked up his mug and his cereal bowl and walked them over to the sink. “Well, it’s been fun. I think we should leave you both to your lunch.”

“If I had known that you boys were here, I would have brought more food home,” Rose said, looking forlornly at the bags on the counter.

“Please don’t fret over it. We didn’t mean to stay so long anyway.” James grinned and rinsed his mug out in the sink as well. “See you tonight, Lily?”

“Yeah,” She nodded. “And Sirius?” He turned around and looked at her. “I’ll talk to Marlene for you,”

“I mean, if you want.” He rolled his eyes, and she scrunched her nose at him. He winked and then they were both gone.

“Tonight?” Rose asked, taking the food out of the bags and handing Lily her box.

“We’re all hanging out at Ernie’s.” Lily shrugged, like it wasn’t a big deal.

It _wasn’t_ a big deal.

“Okay,” Rose said lightly, playing along with Lily’s delusion.

“We’re all hanging out in a group,” Lily tried again. “Marlene is in town! She’s bringing Dorcas, and James said Kingsly might be there.”

“Okay,” Rose repeated, but she had that stupid knowing smile on her face. Sirius’s teasing hadn’t managed to make her blush, but her mum’s grin had her cheeks flushing.


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> And here we are. I hope you all have a lovely Sunday!  
> Enjoy!

It felt very strange to have her mum drop her off at the pub, but it was the responsible thing to do, since Lily normally got shitfaced when she drank with Marlene.

It was nine by the time she got to the pub. Dinner may have been at four, but the drive was almost an hour and Gran had decided to invite more relatives to celebrate the fact that Lily was now a university graduate.

She had to endure hours of people asking her where she was going to work and what she was going to do with her degree now that she was finished with school.

She was very ready to get drunk.

She pushed open the dingy looking door at the side of the building, and even though they stopped letting people smoke in the building about seven years ago, it still smelled like cigarette smoke inside. The lighting glowed orange and the music was loud, but you couldn’t really hear the words. People were crowded around the screen above the bar, they were playing cards in the corner and then there was the group of people that she was looking for, gathered around the two billiards tables on the far back wall of the building.

Lily watched them all for a moment as she approached them, trying to clear her head from all the comments her family had made and prepare herself for an entirely different kind of socializing. She definitely wanted to be here and see these people, but she would have preferred a bit of a social break to collect herself.

James spotted her first, almost as though he’d been waiting for her to walk through the door. She’d texted Marlene when she left her Grans, but that was all the heads up she’d given them.

He smiled at her and took a step forward, but then Marlene spotted her.

“LILLIAN JANE!”

“That’s me!” Lily laughed, meeting Marlene in the middle for an overly enthusiastic hug, which was the only way that Lily and Marlene knew how to greet one another. They had been friends since primary school, but they weren’t close friends until after they graduated. They had gone to different universities, but they were only a quick train ride away, and Lily and Mary took turns with Marlene and Dorcas to go and visit once or twice a month.

“Look at how beautiful you are!” Marlene held Lily at arm’s length and looked her up and down. “And your hair! Gorge!”

“Yes, thank you. I had to make sure it was looking good for gran.”

“The gran I met right?” Lily nodded. “Yes. I was there when she traumatized you at the pool.”

“It took her almost two hours to comb and braid my hair. Like, sometimes it just wants to look like that, and who is she to tell it otherwise?” In her gran’s defense, Lily had not combed her own hair in over two weeks, and there had been debris stuck in her hair from when she and her cousin’s had rolled down the hill. 

Marlene laughed and shook her head, her own naturally tame, blonde bob swinging with the movement. “I’m so glad that you’re here!” Lily pulled her friend in for another hug.

“Lily!” Dorcas’ voice was behind them. She must have been coming from the bathroom. “Thank goodness you made it!”

By the time the three girls made it back to the group, Lily had a drink in her hand and had already taken a shot, as Marlene was quick to point out that Lily had some catching up to do.

“You know, I invited her first,” James said, leaning against a stool and holding a billiard stick.

“James, you’ve seen her every day this week.” Remus offered Lily a quick hug and then sat on a stool next to James and picked up a plate of chips covered in cheese sauce. “It’s good to see you,”

“Good to see you too!” Lily grinned. She and Remus had always got on well, even if she’d never been able to get along with his mates.

And then Sirius was standing in between Lily and Remus so she couldn’t see him anymore.

“You’ve gotten to see her this week as well,” Remus tried to argue, but Sirius wasn’t listening.

“It took you forever to get here,” He said, giving her a look.

“I know, I was at my gran’s.”

“I know.” Sirius looked slightly uncomfortable, so Lily didn’t wait for an introduction. She decided to do Sirius a favor and turn to the man who had just walked up to stand next to him, and hold out her hand.

“You must be Benjy, I’ve heard so little about you.” She couldn’t make it too easy for Sirius.

“I truly feel like a man of mystery,” Benjy laughed, taking her hand. He had bright blue eyes and he was nearly as blond as Marlene. He somehow both looked the opposite of Sirius, and his match. He was taller, and leaner, and had an air of nonchalance about him that Sirius’ posh upbringing would never allow him to achieve. Not so naturally, anyway.

“I hope everyone has been nice to you, I know that was a big concern for some people.”

Sirius groaned and let his head drop back so he was looking up at the ceiling. Benjy laughed and put his arm around Sirius’ shoulders. “Everyone has been very nice to me. I don’t know why James was so worried.” Lily laughed as well and shook her head, looking over at James.

“He just worries about these things. I mean, Marlene and I are not very nice people.”

“Yes, it was us who went around and terrorized everyone during primary and far too much of secondary.” Marlene nodded, coming up on Lily’s left side, trying to hand her another shot.

“I do need to pace myself,” Lily said.

“You can pace yourself once you’ve caught up.” Marlene shrugged.

“Stop, I’m meeting a new person,” Lily muttered quietly.

“No, you’re done meeting him,” Sirius said, looking back at her. “Drink up, little bird,” He took the shot from Marlene’s hand only to put it in her hand. Lily laughed and then complied before responding.

“Little bird?”

“I don’t know, you called me ‘dove’ earlier, I was just following with the theme.”

“I suppose that’s as good a reason as any.” She shrugged. “And fine, I will leave you and Benjy alone for now and I’ll go kick Marlene’s ass at billiards while I’m still more sober than she is.”

“Good call,” Remus nodded. “Because she keeps beating all of us, and needs to be brought down a peg or two.”

“Isn’t that always the case,” Lily teased, poking Marlene in the side. James stood up and handed his billiard stick out to Lily.

“Here, you can use mine. Marlene just beat me a few minutes before you got here.”

Lily took the stick and looked it over. “Doesn’t seem very lucky to use it then,”

James shook his head, grinning. “Nah, it’s lost a few times now. It’s due for a win.”

“Oh, is that how it works? Seems like it might just be a dud of a stick if it’s been losing all night.”

“I mean, I beat Dorcas with it,” James shrugged.

“Hardly counts,” Benjy chimed in. “No offence, Dorcas, I know we only just met, but you’re not very good at billiards.”

Marlene cackled and Dorcas shrugged. “You’re not wrong.”

“Good call interrupting there, Ben.” Sirius nodded. “Once they get going, they don’t stop.”

“Flirting?” Marlene asked, her brow raised as she looked between the three of them, James, Lily and Sirius. “Baby, that wasn’t flirting. Just wait until I get a few more drinks in her.”

Lily was turning red when she heard Dorcas sigh. “I hate drinking with you two. Makes me feel like I’m a third wheel. Right?” She was looking at James when she said this and Lily’s flush quickly turned into a loud laugh and Marlene winked at her. James shook his head, his hand running through his hair. His ears suggested that he had not expected Dorcas to chime in like that.

Lily took another swallow of her drink and then set in on the table next to James. He looked at the drink and then at her, making her feel like putting it there meant something that she hadn’t thought through. “Lo, there.”

She smiled, even though he looked a bit like he was preening. “Lo.”

“Was your aunt nice to you?”

“No.” Lily shook her head. “Couldn’t wait to get here. Though Gran’s homemade bread almost made it worth it.”

“You could have texted me, I would have given you clever insults that would have been wildly inappropriate for you to use.” Lily chuckled.

“I could have shared with you the wildly inappropriate insults that I whispered to my mum all evening. Luckily, no one overheard me.”

“Come on!” Marlene poked her bum with a billiard stick, pushing her a step closer to James. His smile widened as she reached around and pushed the stick away.”

“James was just telling me how much better at billiards I am than you.” Lily shrugged, “And I was explaining to him that it’s not sportsmanlike to say things like that. I mean, your feelings are on the line.”

Marlene clicked her tongue. “You are going down, Evans.”

“I’m proud of you for staying positive,” Lily grabbed the chalk off the side of the table and applied it to her stick. She really was good at billiards. Mary and her had played a lot at uni. Though, the same could be said about Marlene.

They both started here at this table, they both learned how to beat nearly everyone, by pushing one another. It wasn’t a skill that was going to get her a job at a publishing house, but if she remained unemployed forever, she could win a lot of money with this skill.

Marlene lined up the cue ball and took her first shot. She sunk two solid colored balls, but lined up quite a few shots for Lily in the process. She was able to get in two more balls before it was Lily’s turn.

Lily pulled her hair over to one side and leaned over the table to figure out which ball she should go for first. Once she’d worked it all out, she walked around the table and leaned forward, lining up the cue ball. She wouldn’t have noticed that anything was amiss, if she hadn’t taken a second to gloat and look at Marlene.

Except Marlene didn’t have her game face on. When Lily looked at her, she was wagging her eyebrows and glancing behind Lily. Where, Lily realized, James was sitting. And she was leaned over a table, her ass on display.

She rolled her eyes and tried to act unaffected.

But then she started thinking that maybe he thought that’s why she had started here. With her ass in this this particular spot. Even though she wouldn't do that, she was only thinking about how best to beat Marlene. Marlene had to know that, but the look she was giving Lily suggested that she didn’t know that.

And then Dorcas started laughing and Lily sighed, pulling her stick away from the cue ball and dropping her chin to her chest, letting her hair fall around her face.

“I’m not looking!” James said, making her flush even worse.

“I am,” Sirius said.

“He is,” Benjy confirmed.

Lily flipped her head up and wiggled her butt, deciding that she was just going to have to play along. James sounded like he was choking on something.

Lily lined up her shot again. “I thought you said you weren’t looking?” She said, trying to sound casual. She wouldn’t have done that if he hadn’t told her that he wasn’t looking.

She pulled her arm back and then brought it forward. The cue ball hit her striped purple ball perfectly, so Lily stood up and turned around to face James. His ears were still bright red.

“I wasn’t, but then Sirius said that he was and I… well then I looked.” Lily shook her head and turned back to Marlene.

“It’s not going to work, my dear. You tried to distract me, and I still made the shot.”

“It was an easy shot. I would have been embarrassed for you, had you missed.” Marlene shrugged.

Lily walked around the table and quickly lined up her next shot. She made two more balls before it was Marlene’s turn again.

Lily walked over to her drink, and technically she walked over to James. She picked up the cup that now had quite a bit of condensation on the sides, and took a sip. She set it back down and wiped her hands on her pants before reaching for the chalk

“I only looked for a moment.” James blurted out.

“James, don’t make it weird.”

“I didn’t, Marlene and Sirius did that.”

“Okay, but of course you looked. We don’t need to talk about it.” Sirius snorted and James glared at him. Marlene got another ball in and then winked at Lily. Lily flipped her the bird.

“Okay, but I know that you weren’t there to show off your-”

“I’m always showing off my ass,” Lily interrupted him, because even though she appreciated the fact that he was trying to apologize, he didn’t need to, and he was only making her blush come back.

James froze with his mouth open for a second and then closed it and nodded. “I mean,” He cleared his throat. “Aren’t we all?”

“Yes,” Marlene pointed her pool stick at James and nodded. “That is the attitude to have, Mr. Potter. Lily, it’s your turn.”

“Is it? Did you only get one ball in?” Lily tutted and frowned at Marlene. “That’s sad.”

“Fuck off, Evans,” Marlene spun around and Lily was reminded how much more intoxicated her friends were than she was. She took another swallow of her drink and then went to inspect the table.

Lily did end up winning that game. And the next two, but then she was very drunk herself and ended up losing the fourth game. Then they decided to play teams. There were two tables, so Lily and Benjy played Remus and Dorcas, while Marlene played both James and Sirius.

Lily and Marlene kept winning, and drinking, and soon the two girls were dancing to Piano Man, locked in an embrace and singing horribly off key. Lily was pretty sure that Dorcas was recording the whole thing, but when she looked over, she was dancing with James.

“Is my girlfriend making you jealous, Lils?” Marlene whispered in her ear, her hot breath tickling Lily and making her squirm away from her and laugh.

“No.” She said, righting herself and pulling Marlene close again. “Am I making your girlfriend jealous?”

“I hope not. She should be used to it by now anyway.” Lily nodded.

“I wish Mary were here.”

“Yes, then her and Dorcas could commiserate together. Though James seemed to be a good commiserating partner for her so far,” Marlene shrugged.

Lily nodded, though she didn’t feel as though she knew exactly what she was agreeing with. “Marlene, did you know that James fancied me in secondary?”

Marlene snorted. “Yes. Everyone knew that he fancied you. It wasn’t just in secondary.”

“Did you know that I fancied him?”

“Yes. I’m pretty sure that everyone knew that too.”

“Interesting.”

“Yeah, not really.” Marlene shrugged. “The interesting bit is what you’re going to do with him now.”

“He’s moving in a couple weeks.” Lily shrugged. “There’s not much to do.”

“First of all, there is,” Marlene chuckled. “And I thought he said he wasn’t moving that far from here?”

“Like an hour or something. That’s pretty far.”

“Not really.” Marlene shrugged. “I think we should switch dance partners.”

“Why?”

“Because, Dorcas will get upset if I ignore her for the entire night.”

“Oh, yes, of course.” Marlene walked away and Lily narrowed her eyes, trying to work out what song was playing now.

And then James was in front of her, holding out a hand.

She took his hand with her same hand and gave it a shake. He laughed at her and she smiled. “I was told to come and dance with you.” He said, still holding out his hand now that she’d let her own fall back to her side.

Lily found this extremely funny and held onto his arm while she laughed. “I just shook your hand,” She said, covering her mouth as she looked up at him. He was smiling at her, but he was still very upright and he wasn’t laughing like she was, so she straightened and pointed a finger at him. “Are you sober?”

James laughed at this and nodded. “Yeah, I’m the driver,” He took her hand and slipped his arm around her waist. “Someone’s got to get you all back home safely.”

“We can’t all fit in Edith,” Lily snorted, squeezing his hand and resting her other hand on his shoulder. She almost put her head on his shoulder, but if she got too comfortable, she might fall asleep. It was that point in the night.

“Well, Benjy and Sirius left in an uber about twenty minutes ago.” James pointed out.

“They left without saying goodbye?” Lily frowned and looked around, trying to find them both in the crowd.

James laughed at her. “You said goodbye to them,”

“Oh,” Lily shrugged. “I’m very drunk.”

“Yes, you and Marlene are quite entertaining.”

“We certainly think so.”

“Do you want to drink some water before we head out?”

“Are we heading out soon?” Lily asked, trying to frown. Her lips were kind of numb though, so who knows if they were cooperating.

“Well, yes. The pub will be closing soon.”

“Closing!” Lily laughed and turned to look at Marlene. “Marly-Bean! The pub is closing soon!”

Marlene also thought that was hilarious.

Lily looked back at James. “You’re a whole different kind of beautiful when you’re laughing,” He said quietly, almost too quietly. Lily had to lean closer to hear him properly.

“Do you mean that to be a good thing?” Lily asked, still giggling a bit.

“Oh, one hundred percent.” James nodded.

“Thank you,” Lily grinned. “You’re beautiful too.”

“Thank you,” James smiled. “Water?”

“Dancing first,” Lily shook her head and then rested her head on his shoulder, even though she knew it was a bad idea. But then James’ chin was on her head and his arm tightened around her waist and Lily didn’t feel like she was in danger of falling asleep anymore.

She was wide awake.

And she would be content to stay exactly where she was for the rest of forever.


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday! Please enjoy more drunk Lily!

Forever turned out to be the length of a Phil Collins’ song and then James was ushering her and the other girls to the bar and asking for a pitcher of water. She drank a full glass, and then peed twice before they finally left the bar. Lily quite happily clung to James’ hand as they walked across the street to where James had parked much earlier.

James opened the passenger door for her and everyone else climbed into the back. Lily didn’t think about why or how she’d managed to get the front seat without having called ‘shotgun.’ She just climbed in rather clumsily and started fumbling with the seatbelt.

“I forgot to say ‘hello’ to Kingsley!” Lily tried to open her door but James laughed, causing Lily to turn toward the driver’s side. She hadn’t seen him get in the car, but there he was. Smiling over at her with his teeth. Lily smiled back.

“He ended up leaving before you got there. Peter too. They both had work in the morning and took the same train back to London.”

“I missed them?” Lily sighed and leaned her head back against the seat.

“Lily, scoot up your seat,” Marlene nudged the back of Lily’s seat and Lily frowned at her.

“I don’t know how to do that, Marlene,” She huffed. “Edith probably doesn’t even have that feature.”

“Who the fuck is Edith?”

“Edith is the car,” Remus told her. “And Lily is probably right. James, when are you going to get a new car?”

“Shh,” Lily turned around and tried to put her finger over Remus’ mouth. She couldn’t reach him. “Don’t talk like that. James will get upset!”

She faced forward again and didn’t notice that Marlene was giving her a weird look, or that James was smiling at her again. She was too busy watching moths fly around the lamppost next to the car.

“Lily? Did you hear me?” She turned her head toward James and smiled brightly.

“No, I did not. I was looking at moths.”

James laughed and started the car. “Marlene and Dorcas first.” They drove past the streetlamp and the moths. Lily waved goodbye.

“I should call Mary.”

“Do it!” Marlene nodded.

“It’s 2am on a Thursday, I don’t think Mary would appreciate that.” James shook his head and took Lily’s phone out of her hands.

“Of course she would!” Lily argued, trying to take it back. “Besides, she’ll have to be up soon for work anyway,”

“Yes, and that’s why she wouldn’t want you to wake her up now. How about you call her tomorrow?”

“But I won’t be here tomorrow!” Marlene huffed.

“Yes you will,” James reminded her patiently. “You’re here for a wedding that’s on Saturday, so you’ll be here tomorrow.”

“Oh yeah,” Marlene nodded. “Lily, my baby brother is getting married.”

“Isn’t he still in secondary?” Lily snorted. “Why is he getting married?”

“No, Nicholas is getting married!” Marlene laughed.

Lily looked at James. “Isn’t Nicholas her oldest brother?” James nodded.

“He’s still a baby though,” Marlene shrugged. “I wish I could invite you guys, but mum says that I’m not allowed to invite my friends to Nick’s party. Not fair.”

“Not fair at all,” Remus had his head leaned up against the window.

“I’ll be there to keep you company,” James said.

“Also me, your girlfriend.” Dorcas pinched Marlene’s cheek and the blonde girl leaned away from her, into Remus.

“And I’m glad that you’ll be there Dory, but it would be fun if Lily was going to be there. And Mary. I still think we should call her.”

“Do I have to take your phone too?” James asked, looking back at Marlene in the rearview mirror.

“No! Dorcas already took it.” She frowned at her girlfriend and Lily started laughing. 

Lily looked out the window. “James, why have we stopped moving?”

“We have stopped,” Dorcas confirmed. “James, did your car give out?”

“No,” He shook his head, and then the car started moving again. “We were at a stop sign.”

That was probably the funniest thing anyone had said all night and the girls didn’t stop laughing until they were at the McKinnon family home and Marlene and Dorcas were climbing out of the car. Marcus waved to them from the porch and Lily rolled her window down so she could wave back at him, nearly crawling halfway out of the car to do so.

“Don’t shout, people are sleeping,” James reminded her, his hand resting on her back. She put her own hand on top of his.

“Right,” And then she whispered as loudly as she could, “Night, Marcus!”

“Night, Lily!” He called back. “You’re looking pretty as ever!”

“I know! Thank you!” She whisper yelled back. “You’re really pretty too!”

“Stop it!” Marlene whisper yelled. “You’re only allowed to flirt with me!”

“Sorry!” Lily laughed, but continued to whisper shout. “You’re the prettiest, Marley-Bean!”

Lily and Marlene blew each other a bunch of kisses and then she sat back down in her seat and rolled up the window. It took a lot more coordination than it should have, and James had already started down the street again before she got it all the way up.

“I don’t think I drank as much as you did,” Remus said, startling Lily, because she forgot that there was anyone back there now.

“Probably not, but I still beat everyone at billiards.”

“Marlene beat you once,”

“Once. I beat her thrice.” Lily cocked her head to the side. “I’m so good at billiards.”

“Why?” Remus asked.

“Why what?”

“Why are you good at billiards?”

Lily scoffed. “Because Marlene used to beat me all the time.”

James laughed and Lily looked over at him, smiling.

The ride to Remus’ house was pretty quiet, mainly because Remus had fallen asleep and Lily was trying to hum a song that she didn’t remember, a task that took all her concentration.

James roused Remus and walked him inside the small brick home. Lily had always been jealous that Remus’ home was on a small pond. He told her that there were leeches in the pond, but she had always thought that there was probably a way that you could still swim in it.

Luckily, James got back into the car before she could decide that now was a good time to try swimming in the pond.

“Here,” James reached into the back and pulled out a water bottle. “Why don’t you drink some more water.”

Lily took it and did as he suggested, it did sound like a vaguely good idea. She looked at James and took a deep breath. “I’m not used to this.” She said quietly.

“Used to what?” He asked, his face glowing orange as they passed under a streetlamp.

“Someone taking care of me. Driving me home and pumping me full of water,” She took another drink. “I usually do that.”

James shrugged, “Well, I usually do it too. Sirius was fairly tame tonight, and Peter couldn’t stay, but I do have lots of practice taking care of people.” Lily nodded.

“S’not a competition,” Then she shook her head. “I don’t know why I said that. You didn’t mean it like that. I was just thinking about Mary and Marlene. Dorcas helps me sometimes.” She wasn’t making sense, but she really wasn’t capable of explaining herself just then.

“You and Marlene had fun tonight,” He said, letting them navigate right through her jumbled response.

“Yeah,” Lily nodded, then she giggled. “Yeah, I saw her less than a month ago, but I always miss her. I wish we didn’t all have to grow up and move away from one another. I hate that Mary is in Ireland. It’s so far. I used to ride my bike to her house all the time.”

“I remember.” James nodded. “The green bike with the little bell on it.”

“And the basket that I would try and get Mary’s cat to sit in.” Lily laughed and looked over at James again, watching his face glow orange. It was so quiet in the car now. The radio wasn’t on and it was only the two of them.

“Thanks for inviting me out tonight.”

He grinned at her, “Thanks for acting like Marlene wouldn’t have invited you out had I not.”

She giggled again. The water bottle was still in her hands so she took another drink. “Can I hold your hand?”

He removed his left hand from the steering wheel and held it out to her. She watched his face as she took it with her right hand. “Thank you.”

“My hand is yours.”

Lily snorted. “Because you proposed via paper airplane.” James laughed as well. “But that’s not what I was thanking you for.”

“What were you thanking me for then?”

“For taking care of me. And everyone else. I appreciate it.”

He squeezed her hand. “You can be the dd next time.”

“Deal.” She nodded, sure that there would be a next time.

He stopped the car and Lily realized that they were in front of their houses. James had parked in front of his own house and Lily looked over at him. If she wasn’t drunk, she would have quickly realized that he pulled into his own driveway, because it was almost three am and he didn’t want to wake up his parents or her mother by pulling into her drive, only to back out a few minutes later and pull into his drive.

And while the water was helping, and she was starting to sober up, the first thing that went when she drank, was her filter.

“Am I coming home with you then?” She asked, not letting go of his hand, even though they were parked now. He turned his head toward her with an amused look on his face.

“No, I don’t think so.”

“S’not fair that you’ve got to see my room from the inside and I haven’t seen yours.”

He was smirking and Lily wanted to reach up and run her finger along his lips, trace his smile and let her finger rest in the small dimple at the corner. Her fingers twitched on her lap.

“I’m trying not to wake up our parents, Evans. You can check out my bedroom tomorrow if you want. Or any time really, except when it’s three in the morning.”

“You’re the one who pulled into your driveway,” She shrugged. “Why shouldn’t I think that it was an invitation?”

“I mean, if it wasn’t three in the morning,”

“You keep saying that,” Lily sighed.

“Well that’s because I need the reminder.” James ran a hand through his hair. “Also, you’re still quite drunk. I’m not saying I don’t want to invite you in, I’m just saying that right now, it’s probably not a good idea.”

Lily frowned at him, feeling like she was missing something. “Okay,” She shrugged again. “Does that mean I have to let go of your hand?”

James shook his head. “No, we can sit in here as long as you’d like.” He took a deep breath and bit the inside of his cheek. “I really like you, Lily.”

Lily watched his face and leaned against the seat. “Are you sure?” Because even though he seemed so sure, she still had a hard time believing that his feelings had ever been anything more than fleeting. He had always been the center of attention, the football star that everyone fancied.

And her thinking that wasn’t meant to be a slight at herself. It wasn’t as though she didn’t think she could catch the attention of someone like James, she knew that she was a catch, she knew that she was wonderful, but James had spent their entire childhood feeling unattainable.

And now he was sitting right in front of her, their hands linked, telling her that he liked her and she felt sort of like she was floating, even before he said anything else.

“Yeah. It’s not the kind of feeling that leaves room for any doubt.” Lily could feel her heartbeat in her ears and she felt her cheeks heat up, but she kept looking at James anyway. That wasn’t a fleeting answer. It didn’t feel fully real, either.

“How do you do that? How do you just say what you’re feeling like that?”

He ruffled up his hair again and chuckled. “Well, I figure since last time I did completely the opposite, being honest about how I feel is probably a good bet this go round. Yeah?”

“I get that, but that doesn’t really answer my question. I mean you asked me why I got quiet after you grabbed my hand the other day and I couldn’t even tell the truth about that!” She laughed, only vaguely aware that she should be embarrassed about bringing this up. Her mind was still reeling, unable to settle.

“You weren’t thinking about the ‘what if’ of it all?”

Lily laughed again and looked down at their hands. “No, I was worrying about drawing attention to the fact that you hadn’t let go of my hand. I kept thinking that if I did something to remind you that we were holding hands, then you would let go.” 

James tugged on her hand slightly, causing her to look up at him. “No you weren’t.”

Lily let her head fall back against the seat again. “Yes. Yes, I was.”

“Lily,” And his tone said much more that he could have articulated. Slightly exasperated, and slightly joyous. Almost as though he wanted to say ‘what the fuck?’ but in a nice way.

“I know!” She closed her eyes.

“You know that I like you!”

“I do,” She nodded. “I just keep thinking that you’re going to change your mind. I mean, we aren’t the same people we were, and we didn’t really know each other that well back then anyway!” She was worried that she wasn’t going to be who he had thought she was. 

He tugged on her hand, but she kept her eyes closed for a moment before looking back at him. “You don’t have to know everything about a person to know that you like them, that you want to know more. I mean, unless you’re secretly a tornado’s fan, or a conservative nutjob…”

“You place tornado’s fans in the same category as-”

“I said what I said.”

Lily laughed. “I know. I know what you mean, it’s just, you’re not some random bloke. I didn’t just find you on the street-”

“Is that where you’ve been finding the people you’ve dated?” Lily smacked his arm and laughed.

“No, stop,” She shook her head. “Do you get what I’m saying though?”

“I mean, you’re drunk, and I’m pretty sure that you’re only saying half of what you think you’re saying, but sure. I get it. And I’ll continue to woo you until you are ready to tell me that you fancy me too.”

“There’s that word again.”

“Are you going to tattle on me?”

“Probably.”

“To who?”

“Probably everyone.” Lily shrugged.

“What does your mum think about all of this?” He nodded toward her.

Lily scoffed. “I’m pretty sure our mums have been planning our wedding since forever. I caught them on the phone the other day.” James laughed.

“That wouldn’t surprise me.” He leaned against his seat and closed his eyes for a moment. Lily took a drink from the water bottle and considered that maybe James was tired.

“You’re tired,” She said. “We should get out and go to our own homes.”

He let his head loll toward her and smiled before he opened his eyes. “Are you not tired?”

Lily shrugged. “I am, but I’m not ready to go to sleep yet.”

James looked down at their hands and then back up at her. “Because you’re not done holding my hand?”

“No,” Lily shook her head. “I just don’t go to sleep while I feel drunk. It’s how I opt out of hangovers.”

James laughed. “That seems like cheating.”

“You sound like Mary.”

“Good,” James said. “You like Mary, so that can’t be a bad thing.”

Lily laughed as she unlaced their fingers and reached for her door handle. She had to set the water bottle down to open the door and then she was outside and the cool night air made her shiver.

“Hold on,” James was opening his door. “You didn’t ask me if I was done holding your hand.”

Lily spun around and put her palms on the hood of the car. “You were about to fall asleep.”

He scoffed and walked around the car so he was standing beside her. “You tried to invite yourself into my room earlier, what do you care if I fall asleep holding your hand?”

Lily pressed her lips together. “Is that what would happen if I went into your room?”

James was smiling and tilted his head. He sucked in a breath before he answered, “Tonight, yes. You have me feeling like I’m the drunk one.”

Lily leaned forward and leaned her head against his shoulder. “James, I uh-”

“Nah,” James interrupted. “You can tell me tomorrow, yeah?”

“Right.” Lily nodded and James reached up and pushed her hair back. “So, goodnight then?”

His hand slid down her arm. “Yeah,” He nodded. “I guess that is a good idea.”

“Probably.” Lily agreed.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” He looked her over for a minute and neither of them moved. Then he quirked his eyebrow. “Unless?”

Lily laughed and stepped away from him. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” She agreed. “Now I’m going to go eat bagel bites and drink more water.”

James grinned. “Alright. Goodnight.”

“Goodnight,” Lily gave him a little wave and then turned and started toward her garage, knowing that her mum would have locked the front door. She turned around before stepping into the garage and James was still looking at her. “Again, James?” She teased.

“I wasn’t looking at your bum!” His hand jumped into his hair and he spun around, starting toward his house. Lily laughed at him until she couldn’t see him anymore and then pushed open her door and went in search of carbs.


	11. Chapter 11

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday friends! It's freezing cold here and only getting colder. Hope you are all staying warm!
> 
> Enjoy! And don't forget to tell me what you think!

Lily didn’t go to sleep until almost five, she stayed awake, eating junk food and peeing every twenty minutes while trying to watch Ella Enchanted and organize her books on the shelf that James had given her.

Her mum slept on the other side of the house, so she wasn’t overly concerned with waking her up, though she did drop a book at one point, and freeze like she was in a movie, about to be caught breaking into a house she shouldn't be in.

She checked James’ window a few times too, though she knew that he was asleep. They’d had a lot of different kinds of encounters at their windows through the years, but they’d never had their beds within view. So even though she wanted to peek at him, she would have to wait.

She also wanted to text him, but he was asleep, so that wouldn’t work either.

She felt ridiculous, because she’d just been with him for hours. And she’d been a little too honest, she should be embarrassed, but she wasn’t. She shouldn’t be itching to see him like she was.

She went back to her books and her water and her movie, trying to keep her mind off James for a little while.

At least, until she decided she was sober and that it was time for bed.

And then she had no control over what she was thinking about.

The dream was almost a memory.

Her and James, around ten, sitting at the bus stop. There was a bench that wasn’t there in real life, and their feet swung off the ground as they kicked them back and forth. When James smiled at her, he was missing one of his front teeth and he stuck his tongue through the hole. Lily watched him, laughing, the sun shining in his hair.

But then they weren’t ten, they were seventeen, and even though Lily kept trying to reach for his hand, kept trying to capture his attention, he wouldn’t look at her and he stayed out of reach. Their feet no longer swung in the air and there was no laughter or shining hair.

She woke up thinking about how much more creative her subconscious could have been.

And then fell back asleep, and this time there were no dreams and she didn’t wake up again until eleven. And when she did wake up, she felt like she was forgetting something.

She sat up, looking around the room. Everything looked like it was in order, and she’d somehow finished organizing her bookshelf and made it look decent.

Her phone buzzed on her side table and she reached for it.

Mary: I’m in love.

Mary: I don’t know why you haven’t answered me, but I don’t mind typing it out again.

Mary: I’m in love.

Lily blinked at the phone and then laughed, reaching for her water and chugging it before she responded. She shouldn’t be up yet, she’d only had six hours of sleep.

Lily: Love? What is it with you and throwing around big words so easily?

Mary: You were out with Marlene last night.

Mary: She told me.

Lily: Tell me about Reggie

Mary: Nah nah, you were out with Marlene.

Lily: I tried to call you at one point, but James told me that it was too late and took my phone from me.

Mary: What time was it when you remembered that I exist?

Lily: 2am

Lily: It’s not my fault that you live in Ireland and can’t come to the pub with us

Mary: You wound me

Mary: But anyway, yes, I love Reggie

Lily: After one lunch date? They’ll write hallmark movies about the two of you

Mary: They should. This boy is something else, Lily.

Lily: I’m glad that the date went well.

Mary: I’m sorry you live in Cokeworth and I couldn’t force you to come on the date with me

Lily: You have been known to be a bit co-dependent

Mary: I can’t help it. You’re my favorite person. Now tell me about James.

Lily: I had a dream that he started ignoring me last night and now I feel weird

Mary: bastard

Lily: He wouldn’t let me hold his hand either

Mary: stupid bastard

Lily: i hate dreams

Mary: Don’t you normally dream about amusement parks and disney characters?

Lily: You know I do. I don’t hate ALL dreams, just dreams that make you feel weird when you wake up

Mary: Fair.

Mary: Have you been holding James’ hand while you’re not dreaming?

Lily: maybe.

Mary: Good girl

Lily: Shut up.

Mary: Love you too!

Lily looked for other messages, but there were none from James and so she was going to have to message him first. She chanted ‘live in the moment’ a few times before she clicked on his name and wrote a quick message.

Lily: good early afternoon

James: how are you up before me?

Lily: That was an awfully coherent sentence for someone who is asleep

James: I have many hidden talents

LIly: I’m sure

James: Lunch?

Lily: Will you still be asleep?

James: Nah, I’ll probably be able to rouse myself

Lily: Diner?

James: Let’s drive into town and go to that place next to the theater

Lily: is that a cafe instead of a diner?

James: I think so

James: Give me thirty minutes?

Lily: Just text me when you’re ready

Lily got out of bed and finished her water before she padded over to the bathroom to take a shower and pee.

Thirty minutes really wasn’t enough time to dry her hair, so she opted for a still wet messy bun, and then put on some eyeliner and mascara to balance it out.

When she got dressed this time, she did let herself think a little bit about what she was putting on, she let herself admit that she wanted to look nice.

And then she was walking out the door and sitting on the porch, texting Mary again, though about Anne with an E season four teasers instead of boys this time. Lily was trying to tell Mary that she really shouldn’t get her hopes up.

James: Ready when you are

Lily: I’m on my porch talking to Mary

James: You’re ready before me too? Smh

Lily: Step it up

James: I mean, I guess I’ll have to

Lily texted Mary a few gifs of Anne and Gilbert before James was standing in front of her.

“Ready?”

She grinned as she stood up. He held out his hand and she took it, her smile growing.

“I’m ready.”

“Your little trick actually worked, didn’t it? You’re not hungover?”

“If it didn’t work, I wouldn’t do it,” Lily shrugged.

They got in the car and James told her about how Marlene had sent him over twenty texts between when they had dropped her off and when he went to bed. He didn’t specify what she wanted in the texts, but Lily could make an educated guess. She was actually surprised that she hadn’t heard from Marlene yet this morning.

When they got into town, he parked on the road and ran around to open her door for her. The handle didn’t want to work through, so Lily ended up having to open it herself.

“Don’t say anything,” James said, once they’d gotten the door open. Lily laughed as she closed the door behind her.

“I’m not going to tell you to get a new car, James.” She assured him. “If you like Edith, then you should keep Edith. I mean, you might want to take her in to get a tune up or something…” She shrugged.

“It’s just the radio, and then the doors stick sometimes. There’s nothing functionally wrong with the car,” James put a hand on her back as he led her to the door and then held it open for her.

“No one is saying that there’s anything wrong with the car,” Lily turned her head to grin at him over her shoulder.

“Except, that is exactly what everyone is saying.” James muttered as he followed her inside, grinning right back at her. “Half of Marlene’s texts were about how I endangered her life by making her ride home in my ‘death trap of a dinosaur.’”

Lily couldn’t help the snort that followed that comment.

They went up to the counter and ordered before going to find a table.

“You realize this is the fourth day in a row now, right?” James said as they sat down. “Fifth if you count us talking through our windows.” Lily started tallying it up on her fingers, because that both seemed like too small of a number and too large of a number at the same time.

“I guess that is correct,” Lily nodded.

James nodded. “You haven’t even pretended that you don’t want to hang out with me.”

She rolled her eyes since he’d emphasized that phrase just to spite her. “Why would I pretend that I don’t want to spend time with you?”

“Because, I thought you were trying to convince me that it’s not a good idea for the two of us to date.”

“I’m not trying to convince you, that’s just a fact.”

James pressed his lips together. “It’s not a fact, it’s your opinion. And I disagree with that opinion, by the way.”

“I know you do.” She nodded. “Because we’ve been having fun getting to know each other the last few days.”

“And flirting.” He deadpanned.

Lily nodded, “Yes, and flirting. But this two week time slot we got here, isn’t real life. This is like a pause before real life kicks in.”

“Maybe.” And Lily figured that was as much give as she would get from him on the subject. James was quiet for a moment and then he ran his hand through his hair. “What were you going to say last night? Before I stopped you.” He reached out and took her hand.

“Are you changing the subject because you know that I’m right?”

“No,” He shook his head and squeezed her hand. “What were you going to say?”

Lily looked at their hands and chewed on her tongue. He had to already know by now. He just wanted to hear her say it. Sober.

She looked up at him, her heart beating in her ears. “I like you. I was going to tell you that I like you.”

This time he pressed his lips together to keep his smile from over taking his face. She wished that he wouldn’t. “So it’s working, then?”

“I swear to all that is holy, if you say the word ‘woo’ one more time-”

“But it’s working.” He shrugged, squeezing her hand again.

Lily took a breath and was about to say something, though what, she wasn’t sure, when the waitress came over with their order.

James looked much more disappointed than Lily felt.

And then there was food in front of Lily so she started inhaling it immediately. James, for his part, seemed just as hungry.

But that didn’t quite deter him. “This does feel like a pause from reality.” He agreed with her earlier statement, surprising her. “Kind of like we’re getting one more summer break.”

Lily nodded, her mouth full of her BLT.

“That’s not what I want though,” He went on while she chewed. She felt kind of stuck in this moment. If she tried to say something she’d end up spitting tomato and bacon all over him. “I don’t want some kind of summer fling just because we ended up running into one another now instead of at some other point in our lives.”

Lily swallowed, but still found that she was at a loss for words. She needed to say something though. “I never… I never meant to insinuate that I thought that’s all you wanted.”

James shook his head and put down his own sandwich. Lily sat up and took another large bite. “You didn’t, I just want to make sure that I’m being clear about what I want. I’m trying to be honest, remember?”

Lily nodded. She did remember him explaining that last night. He was being honest and forthright so that there was no room for miscommunication or misunderstanding, like when they were kids. If things didn’t work out this time, it wouldn’t be because James was keeping his feelings hidden.

This was new territory for Lily. She’d only dated a handful of people in her life, Anthony had been her only serious boyfriend, but no one had sat before her, while eating a sandwich, and nonchalantly told her in no uncertain terms, that they wanted a serious relationship.

James sat there, not concerned that she was quiet, eating his sandwich as though everything were perfectly normal. And perhaps he thought everything was perfectly normal, because no matter what he’d said in the last four or five days, she wanted to keep spending time with him. He was hardly scaring her off, even if hearing him say that was making her anxiety creep up her spine. She should have brought a sweater with her.

She wasn’t hungry anymore, so she reached for her tea instead.

She was glad that she opted for a warm tea as she curled her hands around the cup.

James noticed now that she was quiet. Or maybe he noticed that she wasn’t shoving food into her mouth anymore, but he was looking at her now, and his sandwich was sitting on his plate as well.

“Lily?”

She pressed her lips together and tilted her head to the side.

“Did I say something wrong?” He asked, fidgeting with his glasses and then reaching for his tea as well.

“No. This just, it doesn’t…” She shook her head and sighed. “I know that I was wrong before, I know that you didn’t dislike me when we were kids, but… I don’t know. It feels like-”

Her phone started ringing and they both jumped.

She looked down at the screen, because her phone never rang.

She was about to hang up on the number when she saw who was actually calling her.

She blinked at it and then looked at James. “I need to answer this.” She said, reaching for it. How many times had it rung? How many rings until her phone went to voicemail.

She stood up from her chair and turned around. “Hullo, this is Lily Evans,”

“Hullo, Miss Evans! My name is Emma Vanity and I work for Hollows publishing. I’m sorry to call you at noon on a Friday, but I’m so glad that I was able to get in touch with you before the weekend!”

Lily hugged her arm around her torso and gripped her shirt. “Thank you for calling! I don’t mind at all that it’s Friday!”

“Yes, of course. Well, we received your resume for the assistant consultant position and would be very interested in having you come in for an interview at your earliest convenience. Are you available anytime next week?”

“Yes!” Lily pushed up on her toes. “Yes, of course. I can come in on Monday if you have anything available then?”

“Monday? Yes, I can meet with you at two thirty? I can email you further details, and if you think of any questions later, please don’t hesitate to email, I normally work all weekend anyway. Do you have any questions now?”

“No,” Lily shook her head. “No, I’m good. I’ll email you if any come up. Two thirty on Monday though? The interview will be in the London office? Sorry, I know I just said that I didn’t have any questions.”

“No problem, yes, the interview will be in the London offices. I’ll email you as soon as we hang up.”

“Thank you! I’ll see you on Monday! Have a good weekend!”

“Thank you! You as well.”

Lily hung up the phone and stared at it for a moment.

Did that really just happen?

She slowly spun back around and James was smiling at her. “What was that?” He asked.

“I just got an interview with Hollows Publishing.”

He stood up from the table and looked at her like he was so excited and proud that she felt a bundle of nerves get caught in her throat. “It’s only an interview!” She said, but he had already reached for her and was pulling her in for a hug.

“It is not,” James said, and Lily wrapped her arms around him tightly. He was right, it wasn’t just an interview. It was a weight on Lily’s chest lifted, it was a sigh of relief. She hadn’t graduated with a job, but that didn’t mean that she wasn’t capable of getting one. She’d known that before of course, but this was the validation that she needed.

“It’s Hollows Publishing,” She said, making no move to pull away from James. “I fucking love Hollows Publishing.”

And then they were back at their table, and James was happily letting Lily go on about all of her favorite books that had come from Hollows, about the details of her internship, what she was hoping for and looking forward to, and then about more books.

“Alright, alright,” Lily shook her head and picked up her sandwich, which had been abandoned after the phone call. “I think I’ve gone on long enough. It’s not like I have the job yet. I’m getting ahead of myself.”

James, who had finished his sandwich, sat back in his chair with his arms crossed over his chest and a satisfied smile on his face. “To be honest,” He leaned forward, resting his elbows on the table. “I think I could listen to you go on about books all day.”

Lily snorted. “Yeah? You’re really going to pretend that I haven’t just bored you out of your mind? You had an empty bookshelf in your room, James.”

He ran a hand through his hair. “You couldn’t bore me if you tried. Not when you looked so excited and proud. Your cheeks are still rosy.” He reached out and poked her cheek and she wrinkled her nose and tilted her head away from him.

“Well, I mean, I did decide to go into this field for a reason.” She shrugged. “What about you? Have you done any more thinking about what you’re going to do?”

James let his hand fall to the table and sighed, reaching up to run his hand through his hair. “Lily,” He huffed. “No. I haven’t made a decision.”

Lily grinned. “I really think you’re going to have to flip a coin.”

“I am,” James nodded. “Why does my agent think I can choose?”

“Because most people can.” Lily shrugged, finishing up her last bite. She was going to need to order more food.

“Wow, and after I was so supportive.”

“I’m just teasing! If there was anything I could do to help you choose between your two favorite teams, I promise you, I would.”

“You’re distracting me.” James said. “Which is helpful.”

“Is that what I am? A distraction?” She laughed. “I hope you let Marlene know that when she was texting you last night.”

James smirked. “Yeah, that’s what I told her.” Lily turned away from him to look at the menu above the counter.

“I’m going to get more food.” Lily stood up and squeezed his shoulder as she walked past him, unable to keep her hands to herself.

When she turned away from the counter after ordering, there were a pair of girls standing at the end. James had his arms crossed over his chest, and he was smiling, but he glanced over at Lily and raised his brows just slightly.

One of the girls noticed him looking at her and looked over her shoulders. She looked at Lily and then looked at the seat across from James.

Lily walked back over to the table, and was nearly all the way there, before she realized that she knew one of the girls at the table. “Camilla?” Lily narrowed her eyes at the girl who had stomped the heel of her pointy toed boot on James’ angsty, teenage heart.

“Yes, that- Lily?” Camilla looked shocked to see her. But then she looked back and forth between James and Lily and frowned. “Are you two…” She trailed off and Lily stepped around her to sit back down.

“It would appear that we are.” James said, looking rather smug about it.

Lily pulled her tea toward her and used it to hide her own smile.

She was most definitely running out of reasons as to why dating James was a bad idea.

Except for the time limit.

And the fact that Lily’s entire future, despite the job interview she now had next week, was still a question mark.

And it was James.

And he just stated that he wanted something serious, not a summer fling. And two weeks wasn’t enough time to build the foundation for a long distance relationship. Even if James wasn’t exaggerating, and he really was only going to be about an hour away, he would still be gone every weekend for games, so when would she even have time to go and visit him? After work? What would his practice schedule be like?

But even if they didn’t start dating, was she really going to be okay with just not seeing him after next weekend?

“Lily?” James nudged her with his foot under the table. She looked up, Camilla and the other girl, who looked vaguely familiar, were still standing at the end of the table and looking at her expectantly.

“I’m sorry, I was not listening just then. What’s going on?”

“I was just telling Camilla that we’ve got plans tomorrow.” Lily narrowed her brows. Why would he be telling her- unless she was standing at the end of their table asking him out with Lily right there even though she just suggested that they were dating. Or maybe she’d invited Lily as well, she could have been having a party or something, but Lily decided to have an internal freakout instead of pay attention to the conversation.

“Yeah,” She nodded. “Sirius wants to hip check James while on roller skates.” She shrugged.

“Is it true that Sirius is dating someone?” The other girl asked. Pip, that was her name! Her and Camilla had been thick as thieves in secondary, but Lily was surprised that they were still friends now.

Lily looked at James and he shrugged. “Yeah,”

“Well come on, James,” Camilla grinned and put a hand on the table, leaning forward. “You’ve got to give us a little more information. After all, none of us girls were ever good enough for him, right?”

Lily bit the tip of her tongue to keep herself from saying something she’d regret.

“I’ve never been one for gossiping.” James shrugged. “If you want to know about Sirius, you’ll have to talk to Sirius.”

“Oh James,” Camilla reached over and shoved James’ shoulder. “You’re not any fun.”

He looked over at Lily with his brows raised and she took another drink of her tea. He wanted her to say something, that much was clear. So she set her cup down and looked over at Camilla.

“Some people don’t like being talked about when they’re not around. Sirius is one of those people,” Lily said, drawing both girls’ attention back to her. James smiled at her and Lily nudged his foot. “What are you two up to today?”

Pip grinned at her. “We’re just visiting with one another. Saw James and came over to say ‘hullo.’ We’re not busy. You two?”

“Nursing hangovers.” Lily lied, as neither of them were hungover. “We were out with Marlene and some others until Ernie’s closed last night.”

“Marlene- Oh yeah, Nicholas is getting married tomorrow, isn’t he?” Pip stood up straighter. “I’ll have to text her.” And then she pulled out her phone to do just that.

The waitress came over with the food that Lily had just ordered, and Camilla had to step to the side so that she could put it down.

“Are these to share?” James asked, moving a plate of pretzel bites closer to him.

“Of course,” Lily grinned. “Help yourself to whatever you’d like.” And then she accepted her own offer and started shoving brownie bites into her mouth.

James picked up a piece of pretzel and dipped it in the cheese. “It was good seeing the two of you,” He waved as he took a bite.

Pip smiled up from her phone and Camilla didn’t look too happy about being dismissed, but she waved back and gave them a false smile.

“It’s cause you’re a bigshot now.” Lily said when they’d walked out of the cafe with their order. “It’s why I started talking to you too.” She shrugged, shoving another piece of brownie in her mouth.

James bumped her foot with his again and then slid it around, so that their feet were hooked together. “S’fine. I mean, whatever it was that enticed you, you’re still here now and that has to count for something.”

“What kind of schedule will you have once training and then the games start up?” Lily asked. “I mean, it’s obviously not going to be a typical nine to five,” She kept looking down at the plates so that she wouldn’t have to see him figuring out why she was asking.

“Well, games don’t start up until September. And practice is pretty intense, but I won’t have an actual schedule till I make a decision. I’m assuming that most of it’s in the morning though. Maybe the scrimmage will be in the afternoons, at least that’s how it was at uni.”

Lily nodded.

“Is that where your head went a few minutes ago?”

“Yeah.” She admitted. “I’m- just thinking.”

James looked at her for a minute and then nodded. “Thoughts you’re not ready to share.”

“Well I-”

“No, I wasn’t saying… It’s fine. You don't have to tell me, you’re allowed to mull things over. I’ve probably been a bit overzealous about everything anyway.”

“No, don’t say that.” Lily shook her head. “Just because I’m not great at articulating certain things, that doesn’t mean you should hold back. 

“So I didn’t say anything that made you uncomfortable?”

“You’ve said plenty that’s made me uncomfortable.” She laughed and picked at another brownie bite. “But you’re not scaring me off, as you’ve already pointed out.”

James tugged her foot a bit closer to him. “Good. So your hang ups are still the same that they were before? We don’t know each other well enough and I’m going to be too far away?”

Lily rolled her eyes. “No. I mean, sort of? Saying that dating was a bad idea because we didn’t know each other wasn’t what I should have said, because obviously people get to know one another while they’re dating. I get that.” She tucked a loose strand of hair from her face and tapped her fingers on the table. “We had ideas built up of course, because we have known each other for a long time. Forever, really. And maybe that’s why I felt like it couldn’t be such a simple decision. Does that make sense? I mean, I liked you on and off for a long time.”

James tilted his head to the side and took a deep breath through his nose. “Okay. I think I understand that.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s the opposite reaction that I had, but sure, I get it.” He grinned.

“And then, yes, there is the issue of you going off to the other side of the world.” She used hyperbole to annoy him of course, but it felt at least a little bit true.

“Right.” He sighed. “So if I just didn’t leave, you’d have no reservations anymore?”

Lily snorted. “I have never in my life, had no reservations.”

James laughed and swiped the last brownie bite off her plate. “Alright, alright. Let’s get out of here.” Lily grabbed a couple of the pretzel bites and took another drink of her tea before she followed him to the door.

“Yeah, quick. Before any more of your exes try and ask you out in front of me.” Lily said, her mouth half full.

James slung his arm over her shoulders and tucked her into his side. “I don’t think I’d mind seeing you get a little jealous.”

“Sorry if I disappointed you before, but I don’t think I could be jealous of Camilla if I tried.” At least not now. She didn’t think she needed to tell him that she had been very jealous of Camilla when he had been dating her when they were kids. “I know how much you dislike her.”

James snorted. “Alright, I suppose that’s fair. You could have pretended though.”

“Right, of course. I’ve actually been pretending not to be jealous. Next time she ambushes you, please make it even more obvious that you don’t want to talk to her. I mean avoiding eye contact and kicking me under the table so that I would talk to her was pretty good-“

“I didn’t kick you!” James laughed, pushing open the door. “I was just encouraging you, gently, with my foot.” Lily elbowed him in the side.

“Whatever, just stop flirting with other girls right in front of me, yeah?”

“Right, don’t know what I was thinking.”

“Kind of sets you back a few steps on the woo-ing front.”

“Wish I could do it over, honestly.”

Lily looked up at him and then wrapped her arm around him as well. “You’re such a dork.” 


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday and Happy Valentine's Day! I hope you enjoy this fluffy chapter of James' family embarrassing him!

It shouldn’t have seemed completely normal to just assume that they would spend the rest of the day together, but when James pulled into his driveway and asked which movie she wanted to watch, she wasn’t surprised. 

And then she just followed him into the house like she’d been there a million times. 

“Mum’s at the salon getting her hair done for the rehearsal dinner tonight,” 

“The McKinnon’s are your cousins, right?” 

“Not really,” James shrugged. “Mum is one of Ms. McKinnon’s best friends, and she’s Marlene’s Godmother, but we’re not actually related. S’why I wasn’t invited tonight.” 

“Are you going to the wedding tomorrow?” 

James nodded his head. “I’ll have to make an appearance. Why? You looking for a way in?” 

“James? Is that you?” 

“I would hope so, dad!” James called out, ruffling his hair as he walked toward his father’s voice. 

Monty was sitting at the kitchen counter, his glasses resting on the tip of his nose, crouched over a small flower arrangement. 

“Is that for mum?” James asked, walking over to look at the flowers over his dad’s shoulder. 

“Yes, but when I took it out of the box, the ribbon fell off and I can’t get it to look nice.” Monty sighed and pushed his glasses up his nose. He sat upright and looked at James, but he noticed Lily standing on the other side of the counter. “Please excuse my manners, Lily. I assumed James was talking to Sirius when he came in.” 

“Fair assumption,” James shrugged, pulling the corsage toward himself as he took the seat next to his father. 

Lily nodded in agreement. “Hullo, Mr. Potter.” 

“Hullo, Lily. You’re doing well, yes?” 

“You asking her that because she’s been hanging round with me?” James asked, still focused on the ribbon.” 

“It’s a fair question,” Monty grinned at Lily. 

“I am well, as far as I know.” 

“Don’t crush the petals, James,” Monty cautioned. 

“I won’t,” James was squinting at the ribbon now and it was pulling too tight on the stems. 

“Here, let me,” Lily said, reaching for the corsage before either of them could protest. She quickly undid the damage that James had caused and re-tied the bow. “My sister put me in charge of bows at her wedding. Bows on the gift bags, bows on the end of the pews, bows on the bouquets and in the flower girl’s hair and anywhere else she could put one. I’m something of an expert now.” It was a small ribbon, which gave her some trouble, but it still turned out quite well, and when she spun it around to show Monty, he looked impressed. 

“There were quite a few bows at her wedding,” Monty picked up the arrangement and put it back in the box. “How are Petunia and Vernon? Little Dudley?” 

“They are well,” Lily shrugged. She hadn’t talked to her sister in a few months, but she saw plenty of pictures of her nephew on social media to know that he was thriving and spoiled. “Every time I see Dudley, he’s bigger.”

Monty chuckled as he walked over to the fridge to put the flower away. “Kids have a way of growing up too fast. I mean, look at the two of you! How is it possible that you’re both twenty-two? It seems like it was only yesterday that you were running about in the sprinkler and drawing with chalk on the driveway.” 

James laughed and ran his hand through his hair. “You still think of me as a six-year-old?” 

Monty shrugged and reached out to nudge James. “I suppose you’re a bit more grown up than six. What are you two up to this afternoon?”

“A movie.” James answered. “I told you that we got in late last night, so we’re just going to laze about. I’ll try and convince Lily to accompany me to the wedding tomorrow and, that’s about all I think.” 

Lily nodded. “You want to call Ms. McKinnon the day before her son’s wedding and ask for an additional place setting?” 

Monty laughed as James flinched. “Well when you put it that way,” 

“I certainly wouldn’t want to mess with her today,” Monty agreed. “I’m heading out to pick up my tux and your mother,” He picked up his keys from the counter. “I’ll see you both in a little while.” 

Lily waved as he walked toward the door and then turned to James. “What are we going to watch?” 

“Let’s head upstairs and figure it out.” James pushed off the counter and grabbed her hand as he walked past her, leading her toward the stairs. She let herself be led through the Potter’s house. 

Some things looked familiar; the large blue couch that she’d fallen asleep on while waiting for her mum and dad to get back from the doctor’s after Petunia broke her leg, the braided, colorful rug at the bottom of the stairs. The family portrait hanging over the television, with five-year-old James grinning without his front teeth. 

She’d only been in the Potter’s house a handful of times, but it still felt comfortably familiar. It smelled like James here. 

“How did your family end up in this neighborhood?” Lily asked. 

“Whatever do you mean?” James grinned, looking over his shoulder at her as they walked up the stairs. “My father’s company headquarters are in London, his family all live in Scotland, my mum’s family lives in, well actually they’re pretty spread out. Why wouldn’t we end up in Cokeworth?”

“Right.” Lily nodded. 

“They used to live in the city, but when they had me, they wanted somewhere a bit slower paced, somewhere I could run around and not get hit by a bus. Why here exactly? I guess it was just luck.” He squeezed her hand. 

Lily looked at the family pictures that were hanging on the walls, dozens and dozens of them, half of them including Sirius, Remus and Peter. 

“Alright, are you ready?” James asked, pushing his door open. 

Stepping into his room was just as weird as seeing him standing in her room had been. Surreal and dreamlike. “It’s backwards.” She said, looking around. His room was bigger than hers, longer. His bed was to the right, and to the left was a small couch and a tv. His walls, of course, were decorated with football posters and jerseys. The two jerseys that she could see from her window were to her left and she reached out and ran her fingers over the canons jersey. 

“I should have told everyone that I saw you snogging this after you started that rumor about my NSYNC poster.” She said as she started toward the couch.

“Sirius would have backed up the rumor, so thank you for _not_ doing that.” 

Lily grinned at him as she took a seat on the couch. She pulled a fluffy blanket that had been tossed on the back of the couch over her as she did, and then spotted a large stack of books next to the tv stand.

“Hey, James?” 

“Yes?” 

“Why do you have all those books on the floor?” 

James looked at her and then at the books. He blinked once.

The corner of his mouth tugged upward and he looked back at her. “I probably should have put those somewhere else.” 

“You told me that you weren’t using that bookshelf.” 

“I mean, I was hardly using it. That was all that was on it. And stacks of books on the floor don’t bother me.” He shrugged, picked the remote up from the coffee table and then sat down next to her. 

She could hear what he wasn’t saying, and she debated whether or not to say it for him. It would reignite the conversation they hadn’t finished at the cafe. 

Which wouldn’t be a bad thing. 

But she found the words didn’t really want to come out. 

He gave her the bookshelf because he was moving in a week and wouldn’t need it. 

She leaned against his shoulder and pulled the blanket up to her chin. “Thank you.” 

He turned and kissed the top of her head, shifting to put his arm around her, as though they did this all the time. 

She wanted to. 

Just like when they had been dancing in the pub, she felt near euphoric with his arm around her. 

“I might fall asleep.” She said, trying to quiet her mind. 

“I might also fall asleep,”

They were quiet as James flipped through a selection of movies. 

“It hasn’t only been five days, you know.” 

“What?” Lily squeezed the blanket. 

“We’ve known each other our entire lives. Things are different now, but it hasn’t only been five days.” 

“Over twenty years.” She agreed. “And this is the first time I’ve ever been in your room. Or used you as a pillow.” 

“Earlier though, that wasn’t the first time you told Camilla off for me.” 

“I didn’t tell her off,” Lily scoffed. 

“Your tone though- and you lied for me! Twice.” 

Lily clicked her tongue. “I lie all the time. You’re not special.” 

James laughed. “Can you help me pick a movie?” 

“No.” Lily shook her head. 

James scoffed and tightened his arm around her. “Careful, or I might just put on a football movie.” 

“I already told you that I was going to fall asleep, so that threat falls a bit flat.” 

His thumb brushed up and down her arm and despite the blanket covering her arm, goosebumps erupted. She very nearly rolled her eyes at her own reaction. 

But James had a point. It hadn’t only been five days. The way that she had fancied James while in secondary was far different than the way that she was growing to fancy him now, they still had a whole host of history between the two of them. And while she’d been focusing on the negative side of things a little too much, there had been a lot of good moments between the two of them as well.

Like what Monty had brought up. The two of them had played in the sprinkler together when they were kids. 

James started _Balto_ , which Lily couldn’t argue against of course, but it did feel a little out of season. 

And then she remembered that this was the movie that his mum had taken her, James and Petunia to see. It was the only time she’d gone to the movie theater and gotten more than popcorn. Mia had bought them pretzel bites and they each had their own drink and box of candy. It had seemed extra special. 

“You’re kind of a swat, you know that?”

“You can call me all the names you want. You’re using me as a pillow.” 

Lily snorted. “I told you earlier that I fancy you. Why haven’t you thrown that back in my face yet?” 

“Why would I throw that in your face? I’m holding that one close to my chest. I’m not throwing it anywhere.” 

Lily shifted so she could look up at him. “And now you’re gonna be a sap? Ridiculous.” She fell back against his shoulder and shifted her legs, tucking her toes into the couch cushions. 

“I just wanted to watch _Balto._ You’re the one that turned it into something.” 

“I was already thinking about the non-terrible memories of you that I have. You didn’t need to put on _Balto._ This is not the kind of movie that should be used deceptively. Also, Muk and Luk are my favorite.” 

“Same. Also Boris. Which memories were you thinking about?” 

“Roof memories.” Lily admitted. “Also the sprinkler memories that your dad brought up.” 

“I always felt like we never actually talked on the roof. Like it was something my brain just created during a malfunction.” James grinned. “I mean, I know that it happened, but it kind of still feels like it was actually a dream.” 

“I felt that way too. Especially when you would, you know, run to the bus ahead of me the next day and pretend that I didn’t exist.” 

“I didn’t always do that.” Lily looked up at him, and his eyes stayed on the tv screen. “Sometimes I waited to leave my house until after you’d made it to the bus stop.” 

“Right, that’s much better. You know that made me feel like you thought we could only be friends when no one could see us, right?” 

“Well now I do.” James huffed. “But you know that that’s not what I was thinking.” 

“Yeah. I mean, I do think it was wise of you to alter your current plan on that front.”

“Yes, I gave ignoring you in public a lot of thought, but quickly realized that it would have made our trip to London awfully dull.” 

“I probably still would have gotten chocolate from that trip, but sure. It wouldn’t have been as interesting if you had only spoken to me in the car.” 

“If I just start bringing you chocolate every day, will that work better than what I’m doing now?” 

“No.” Lily shook her head. “I mean, it wouldn’t hurt anything, but no.” 

“So you’re saying I’m doing a really good job then?” 

“You know that you are, so don’t start asking for pats on the back.” 

He squeezed her closer to him and kissed the top of her head again. And the real kicker, was the realization that she didn’t mind his being smug. That it felt kind of _really_ good to have him feel so good about himself just because she liked him. Because she had admitted that she liked him. 

She took a deep breath and tried not to think about how far gone she was. 

“I’m going to have to take your roller skating now. Don’t want to turn you into a liar-” 

“I’ve already admitted to being a liar. And if you try and make me go roller skating then I’ll invite Sirius so he’ll check you into the wall the whole time.” 

“He did that when we were fifteen, why do you think he would-” He stopped talking. “What did Camilla even think she was going to accomplish today?” 

“That is a better question than your first one,” Lily teased. “And I don’t know. Perhaps she realized that she made a mistake when she saw you sitting there.” It was a generic answer, but they were picking the sled team that would go and get Rosie’s medicine, and Lily was getting sucked in.

“I kind of think she saw you sitting with me before she came over.” 

Balto was winning the race. “Yeah?” 

“Yeah,” She felt him take a deep breath, but Balto had just crossed the finish line and she knew what was about to happen. “Yeah. I guess she could have just been waiting for you to leave. She wanted to come talk to me now that I’m… well, you know.” 

“Right,” Lily nodded, glaring at Steele as he tricked Balto into scaring people so that he couldn’t help Rosie. “No one knows why she does what she does.” 

“I mean, clout would fit with what I know about her. She only went out with me in the first place after she found out that my dad invented that stupid hair cream.” 

Lily shook her head, “Wait, what are we talking about?” 

“Camilla wanting to date me again because I’m famous.” 

Lily blinked rapidly and leaned away from him so she could look at his face. “I paid attention to the movie for two minutes and now you’re _famous_?” 

“Well no,” James said, the corner of his mouth tugged up, letting her know that he was about to give her a hard time. “I was famous before two minutes ago.” 

Lily blinked at him, unamused with that joke. 

“Not globally,” He shrugged, still grinning at her. “But yes, I think I’m considered famous. At least among people who watch football.” 

“And you think that’s why Camilla came over?” 

“I don’t know any other reason she would have come over. And you suggested it in the first place!” 

“You can’t think of any other reason?” James raised his brow, daring her to offer one up. She smacked him on the arm, “Don’t look at me like that! You don’t walk around this world looking like you do and then think the only reason that a girl, who was an absolute cow to you, would want to talk to you is because you’re good at kicking a ball around.” James started laughing so she smacked him on the arm again. 

“She wasn’t a cow.” James was still laughing, and he caught her hand in his. “I mean, I’ve met many cows and they have been nothing but sweet and lovely.” 

Lily snorted, “I’m sorry my choice of insult wasn’t good enough for you.” 

James ran his thumb over her knuckles and laughed, “ _Walk around this world looking like you do,’”_ He ran a hand through his hair and cocked his head before he looked at her. “What are you trying to say?” 

All Lily had time to do was roll her eyes before the faint click of the front door opening preceded Mia Potter shouting up the stairs, “We’re home! I’m going to whip something together for you two before we leave! James, I need you to go to the garage and get the peaches from the freezer!” 

“Ma, you don’t need to do that!” James shook his head and looked at his door.

“I know, but I want to!” She called back. “Now go and fetch them for me please!” 

James let out a sigh, and then pushed himself off the couch. “You are most welcome to stay up here and avoid her.” 

“I’m not going to be rude, James.” 

“Please be rude, and stay up here.” 

Lily clicked her tongue and pushed herself off the couch. “I’m not afraid of her.” 

“I am,” He scratched the base of his neck. “But fine, don’t hide from my mother.” 

He said it like she was the one being unreasonable, but when he held his hand out to her, she took it with a smile. 

“Are you going to tell her how handsome you think I am?” 

Lily stuck him with a look. “What would you do if I did?” 

“Please don’t.” All traces of glibness died immediately.

“Careful, Potter. I’m not the one who is easily embarrassed.” 

“Yes, well, I mis-stepped.” James started them toward the stairs. 

“James!” 

“Coming, Ma!” 

“Yes, go and fetch the peaches, peaches.” Lily reached over to pinch his cheek and he pushed her hand away. 

“What is it with you and Sirius?” 

“Why are you grouping me in with him?” 

“The nicknames.” 

“Ridiculous,” Lily shook her head and let go of his hand as he turned to head to the garage, and she went to the kitchen. “Afternoon, Ms. Potter.” James’ mum was raiding the pantry, piling things on the counter. “How can I help?” 

“Oh pish,” Mia’s face came into view as she closed the pantry door and she smiled at Lily. “I don’t need you to do anything, dear. It’s just so good to see you! It’s been far too long.” 

“It has been a while,” Lily agreed. 

“Yes, tell me what you’ve been up to! You just graduated with an English Lit degree, yes?” 

Lily knew that her mother and Ms. Potter talked quite frequently, and Mia knew that Lily knew this, but Lily still smiled and nodded. “Yeah, I’m looking for a job in publishing now, but I’ve had a slow go of things. Actually, I got offered an interview with The Hollows publishing company, just today!” 

“That is so exciting!” 

“I hope everything goes well, because I love The Hollows. They have a really great outreach program where they help bring books to underfunded schools in different countries around the world. They also set up writers workshops for young teens in public libraries. And also, they’ve published like, six of my favorite books.” 

Mia laughed as she pulled her mixing bowl forward. “I also have a plethora of favorite books.” 

“Who can pick just one?” Lily grinned, taking a seat at the counter. 

James walked back in with a freezer bag full of peaches. “What are you making exactly?” He asked, setting the bag next to the mixer. 

“Jam, but I’m making that on Sunday. I just need the peaches out so they can thaw before then. Put them in the fridge please.” 

James raised his brow and gave Lily a look. 

Mia fluttered around the kitchen, pulling pots and plates and spices out of the cabinets and Lily started to get excited as she watched the prep begin. 

It was common knowledge around the neighborhood that Mia Potter was a phenomenal cook. 

“I’m so glad that the two of you have been spending time together,” Mia sighed, emptying a can of something into one of the pots on the stove. “Did you have a good time last night at the pub?”

“Yes,” Lily answered as James sat down next to her. “Marlene and I bested everyone at billiards and then put on a concert for everyone in the pub. We had a really good time.” Mia laughed and it sounded like bells. 

“Oh, I wish I could have seen that. James can be such a sore loser though, did he behave himself?” 

“Yes,” Lily nodded, “He was actually pretty quiet last night, though I might just think that because I was extra loud,” She looked over and saw James nodding. 

“You did spend a good ten minutes arguing with a stranger over what the lyrics to _Piano Man_ are.” 

“Did I win that argument?” Lily asked. 

“Of course, you did.” James nodded. “And Marlene had your back the entire time.” 

“It was really nice to see her again. I miss getting to see her every weekend.” Lily rested her chin on her fist. “I’ll have to make sure to see her again on Sunday before she leaves.” 

“Too bad that Mary can’t get down here by Sunday.” 

“Yes, it is terrible that she decided to go and live in a different country.” Lily agreed. 

“Where is Mary?” Mia asked, wearing a smile like she thought she might just be reminding Lily that she was still in the kitchen. But Lily’s mum had already told her that she and Mia had been gossiping about her and James since they were young so she already knew what Mia was thinking before she came into the kitchen. 

“Ireland. She’s staying in her grandad’s old house while working at a local news station. It’s not where she wants to be, or even what she wants to be doing, but she’s gotta start somewhere.” 

“She wants to get into writing, yes?” 

“Yes,” Lily nodded. “She’s brilliant too, her humor is wicked smart, but she still needs to build up her contacts so she can show her pilots to the right people.” 

“I’m so proud of all you kids,” Mia grinned and shook her head as she started stirring a pot of something on the stove. Lily had already lost track of what she’d put in there and was no longer trying to guess what she was making for them. “You’ve all got such big dreams and you’re just going for it.” 

Lily smiled over at James who was smiling right back at her. 

As down as she’d been feeling about where she was in her life just now, she couldn’t help the bubbles of joy that came to the surface when Mia said that she was proud of her. 

Fifteen minutes later, Lily had a plate full of the most delicious smelling pasta in front of her and Mia was rushing out of the kitchen to go and get dressed. 

“Thank you!” Lily called after her, leaning over the plate to smell it even closer. “Gah, that didn’t even take her very long!” Lily picked up her fork and scooped up a bite, remembering to blow on it first before she burnt her entire mouth. It would be worth it though. 

“My mum is glad that we’ve been spending time together.” James nudged her with his elbow. 

“Didn’t I already tell you that our mum’s gossip about us all the time?” 

He raised his brow. “You said that they talked about us when we went to London, you didn’t say that it was a recurring thing.” 

“I didn’t?” Lily shrugged. “They’ve been talking about us with one another since we were kids.” 

“Really?” James looked almost panic stricken and Lily laughed at him. 

“Really,” Monty said as he walked into the kitchen. “Your mum used to go next door after you two got on the bus and have tea with Rose so they could talk about everything they heard you two shouting at one another through your windows. There was a lot of excitement when we spotted the two of you up on the roof.” 

Lily started laughing, having to cover her mouth since it was full of pasta and she didn’t want to spray it all over the Potter’s kitchen. 

“How are you laughing at that?” James asked, and when she looked at him, she saw that his face was almost entirely red, and that only made her laugh more. 

“I mean, I already knew most of it, and it’s funny! Also, your ears are so red and that is funny too,” She laughed, reaching out and pinching his ear. 

“What are you laughing at?” Mia asked, walking into the kitchen wearing a beautiful teal dress. 

“James is just now finding out that you and Rose like to chat about the two of them.” Monty answered, opening the fridge and pulling out the corsage. 

“Of course we talk about the two of you! You’re our children!” 

“No, dear,” Monty shook his head as he opened the plastic box and picked up the flower. “Lily knows how you two talk about them.” 

Mia narrowed her brow and looked at Lily. “Oh, does she?” 

“Yes, mum told me.” 

“Yes, they seem to tell each other everything.” James sighed, running a hand through his hair. 

“And James has been so worried that I’m going to scare you off.” Mia chuckled and then held out her hand so that Monty could put the corsage on her wrist. 

“Can’t imagine why, darling,” Monty grinned, sliding the band over her hand. “We should head out now, or we’ll be late.” 

“Yes, yes, we don’t want to do anything to stress out Cora even more.” 

“James, when you get married, you can’t get married here at the house.” Monty said, raising his brows, in total agreement with his wife. 

“No no,” Mia shook her head. “You can, but you can only have twenty guests if you do. I don’t know what Cora was thinking when she agreed to host everything. She’s not going to be able to relax until all of this is over with!” 

“Twenty doesn’t seem so bad,” Monty shrugged. “Though that would leave out a lot of people. Though I guess it just depends,” He looked over at Lily for a moment and she raised her brows. What was he looking at her for? Was Monty a more active participant in Mia and Rose’s teas than he’d led them to believe? 

He shook his head and looked off before saying anything and Mia swatted him on the arm. None of this was very subtle and James’ ears had gone red again. 

“Yes, well, let’s let Nicholas get married first and we’ll worry about me later.” James grinned and then stuffed a large bite of pasta into his mouth.

“Yes, we’ll be off now. Have a good night,” Mia grinned and then looped her arm through Monty’s and started them both toward the garage. 

“Thanks again for the pasta, Ms. Potter!” Lily called after them. 

When the door was closed James turned to her and pushed his glasses up his nose. “How do you just sit there and act as though you’re perfectly fine?”

“He didn’t actually ask me anything.” Lily shrugged. “Though, I probably would have been fine had he asked me. I don’t have a lot of family and we have a lot of the same friends, we probably could get away with about twenty people.” 

James looked at her for a moment and then blinked and turned back to his dinner. 

“It’s only weird if you let it be weird.” Lily shrugged. 

“No, they’re my parents and they are mortifying.” 

“They’re wonderful. I’m quite certain that I like your mum more than I like you.” 

James scoffed. “You don’t always have to be so honest.” 

“I know, but I told you that I never learned how to filter things. If you make me a plate of pasta like this, then you’ll probably gain a lead, but until then,” She tilted her head and then took another large bite. 

James sighed. “I suppose that’s fair.” 

“It’s more than fair.” 

James grumbled something incoherent into his dish and then looked over at her. “I can’t believe my _dad_ almost just casually asked you how many guests you’d need- I mean, I’d expect that from my mum, but _dad?_ ” Lily laughed and patted James on the back.


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday! We've got a lot of good stuff in this chapter! I hope you like it!

Lily started Saturday morning off facetiming with Mary.

After three and a half hours of talking about everything and nothing and enjoying time with her best friend while also missing her and trying to convince her to come home for just tomorrow so they could hang out with Marlene together, they hung up and Lily decided to head to Hopper’s to get some lunch.

James had texted her a few times while she’d been talking to Mary, and Lily had responded only once to let him know that she really was sure that she didn’t want to crash Nick’s wedding with him and that he would have to go by himself or find a date who had an invitation.

She suggested that he ask Camila, because she probably wouldn’t mind being rude and showing up somewhere, she wasn’t wanted.

He agreed that she would most definitely want to come with him, since he’s so famous.

And then Lily didn’t respond.

She noticed that the Potter’s had already left for the wedding by the time she got out to her car, so she pulled out her phone to see if he’d messaged her again.

He had.

James: This is your final chance to change your mind

James: You’re not even checking your phone anymore

James: What if I had something really important to tell you

James: Mum and Da are talking about my wedding again

James: *our

James: I decided to drive Edith to the wedding so I don’t have to be alone with them any longer.

James: Thanks for the support dear

Lily: Tell them I’d like a fall wedding, with a peaches and cream color scheme

She put her phone in her bag and tossed it into the passenger seat. While she was driving, she started rehearsing what she would say to the interviewer on Monday. Mary had helped her this morning, pretending to be the interviewer for her.

She parked, and got out of her car still going over her talking points. She was so focused, that she almost ran right into Sirius.

He put his hands on her shoulders and pushed her back before she realized who he was.

“Sirius?”

“Red, what are you doing here? Why aren’t you with, James?”

“Why would I be with James? He and his parents went to Nick’s- why aren’t you with James?”

“I wasn’t invited.”

“Me either, but I’m surprised that stopped you.”

“Ms. McKinnon is scary.” He shrugged.

“That’s also why I’m not with him,” Lily agreed.

Benjy walked out of the diner behind Sirius, holding a couple bags of take out and he reached out to hand her one. “Afternoon, Lily!” He grinned.

She took the bag and narrowed her brow. “Afternoon,”

“I saw you out here being accosted by my boyfriend, so I grabbed your bag for you.”

“Oh, I hadn’t paid-”

“Don’t worry about it,” Benjy waved her off.

“Thank you, Benjy,” She grinned.

“Let’s go eat in the park,” Sirius said, and Lily assumed that he was talking to Benjy and was about to bid them farewell and get back in her car, when Sirius looped his arm through hers and started leading her across the street.

“Oh, alright.”

“Peaches and cream?” He asked, raising his brows.

“I haven’t even seen his response yet, but I’m not surprised he texted you.” Lily nodded. “And no, not really. Maybe, I mean peaches is a good orange-”

Sirius started laughing and Benjy came up on his other side and grinned at Lily.

“He said his parents were planning our wedding. What was I supposed to do? Also, we all know his ears got all red when he saw,” Lily opened her bag while they crossed the street and pulled out a few chips. “People keep expecting me to be embarrassed, I’m not going to be embarrassed because James’ parents want to plan our wedding.”

“He told me that your mum is in on it.”

“Oh yeah,” Lily nodded, “I asked her if Monty attended her and Mia’s teas when I got home last night and she just started laughing at me. I don’t know how I didn’t realize that my mum and Mia have been rooting for James and I since we were kids. And clearly James thought that it was all confined to his house.”

She shoved a few more chips into her mouth and then Sirius reached over and picked one out of her bag. “You know he really fancies you, yeah?”

Lily felt a bit less confident now that they were talking about feelings, but she wouldn't let Sirius know that since she just went on about how she didn’t get embarrassed. “Yeah, I know. If I didn’t know that- I mean, I’m sure he’s also told you that I fancy him too.”

Sirius snorted. “Yeah, I just needed to hear you admit it.”

Lily looked over at him, “Why?”

“Because I’m protective of my brother, and he’s been spending all his time with you instead of me even though he’s moving an entire world away next Friday.”

“Friday, huh?” Lily’s heart started beating faster. “Well I’m so glad that we got to tell each other that we fancy the other before he moves eight million miles away.”

Sirius tightened his arm around her and then slipped his arm out and headed for a table nearby. “I don’t fault you for not wanting to start something new when he’s about to move and you’re both about to start new jobs. I mean, nothing has been easy when it came to the two of you.”

“Yes, just be more like Sirius and I,” Benjy set their bag of food on the table and took a seat. “Take him out for lunch and then ignore him while you accost your best mates not-girlfriend.” Sirius nudged him with an elbow after he sat down. 

Lily chuckled. “I’m James’ not-girlfriend?”

“Well,” Sirius shrugged, “He was actually right about that. But I’m not ignoring you.” He turned to his boyfriend.

“Have you said two words to me since we walked out of the diner?”

“I’m speaking to you now,” He reached for the food and started opening it up. His eyebrows were raised and Benjy was smirking at him. Lily laughed at the two of them.

“You know, Sirius, it’s a shame you spent all of secondary giving James terrible advice, otherwise I feel like you and I could have been friends.”

“I’m sorry about that, I knew it was shit advice when I was giving it.” He ran his hand through his hair, a very James thing for him to do, a very non-Sirius thing to do. She believed that he was sorry.

“You were just giving him shit-”

“But I wasn’t. James talked about you all the time, and I didn’t like it. Remus was after that one bird and Peter had a new crush every other week, and I just needed one of my friends to not want to be dating someone. When I realized that that wasn’t going to happen, I settled for just not helping James date you.”

Lily frowned and tilted her head. “I used to get frustrated with Mary all the time. She would get these obsessions with people and not want to talk about anything else. Then she’d try and set me up so that-”

“Yes! I hated that so much! When I would complain about them wanting to date everyone, they would suggest that I just find someone to date like it was so simple! Like the thought of dating someone how they wanted to date someone didn’t give me hives.” Sirius shook his head.

Now Lily was a little confused. She glanced at Benjy and then back at Sirius. “Because you wanted to date boys?”

“No, I didn’t want to date anyone.” Sirius laughed, putting an arm around Benjy. Benjy laughed too as he opened the wrapping of his sandwich.

“I had a similar experience. Only, I did have a girlfriend for a little while.”

“One weekend, doesn’t really make her your girlfriend.” Sirius scoffed.

“Well, I tried dating in secondary anyway.” He shrugged. “It was very uncomfortable, and I did not like it.”

“We’re ace,” Sirius said, and Lily nodded, all the pieces of what he was saying finally falling into place. “You know what that is?” He seemed surprised.

“I do,” Lily nodded again. “Mary and I were in a pride club at Uni.”

“Are you…?”

“No, but Mary didn’t want to go alone and we’re a bit co-dependent. Of the two people I’ve fancied in my life, they’ve both been men.”

“Only two?” Benjy asked, echoing a question she’d heard before.

“Yeah, I liked James for way too long. And then I dated someone in uni for a while.”

“How long did you like James?”

“He didn’t tell you?”

“No, did you tell him?”

“I did.” Lily nodded. “Do you remember Kyle?”

“Yes, he was a piece of shit to you, wasn’t he?”

“Yes, he broke my headband in year two… maybe three. James stood up for me. That’s when I started liking him the first time.” Sirius started laughing at her again.

“Oh, you two really are hopeless!”

“Maybe determined is a better word,” Benjy offered, trying to be nice.

“Stubborn.” Sirius countered. “Terrible communicators. Pig-headed, maybe?”

“Yes,” Lily agreed. “All of it, yes.”

The boys laughed again and Lily smiled. It was sort of ridiculous how easy it was to sit here with Sirius and his boyfriend and laugh at herself.

“Just be nice to him,” Sirius said with his mouth full of chips. “I like you, I know I didn’t always like you, and I was kind of an asshole to you in secondary-”

“I accept your apology.”

“-though you were an ass to me as well-”

“You convinced James, multiple times, to throw rocks at my window at two or three in the morning.”

...yes, well, I’m just saying. It was a two-way street.”

“It really wasn’t.” Lily shook her head. “I would never have been an ass to you, if you hadn’t gone out of your way to be mean to me.”

“Mean? I take issue with that.”

“He really is sorry,” Benjy tipped his milkshake in her direction and then took a sip.

“I can tell,” Lily nodded.

“Be nice to James,” Sirius huffed. “That is all I was saying.”

“See what he texted you about your wedding.” Benjy added.

Lily pulled out her phone.

James: I’m not telling my mum or dad shit

James: tell them yourself

James: nvm, please don’t. They’ll actually start planning

James: it already seems like mum is taking notes

Sirius was reading over her shoulder. He snorted and then plucked the phone from her hands, stopping her from telling James anything.

She picked up her sandwich and took a large bite before she leaned over his shoulder to see what he was texting James.

Lily: Hey! This is Lily. James told me that you two were planning our wedding, but he’s refusing to tell you the color scheme I want. It’s peaches and cream. Hope you’re having fun!

Lily nearly choked on her sandwich when she realized that Sirius had just texted Euphemia.

But then she started laughing. “I didn’t knock on the front door the other day because I was worried about them thinking that we were dating.” She turned to poke Sirius’ arm to find that he was smiling hugely at her. “Did he tell you that his dad almost asked for my input yesterday when they capped the wedding at twenty guests?”

Benjy snorted into his milkshake. “They were talking about your wedding in front of you?”

“No, at that point it was just James’ wedding.”

Sirius let out a bark of laughter. “Until papa Potter thought to ask the bride,” He shook his head. “That’s amazing.” He pulled out his phone and laughed again. “James has texted me.” Lily leaned closer to look.

James: LILY TEXTED MY MUM

James: MY MUM IS NOW PUTTING TOGETHER A PINTEREST BOARD

James: I forgot she had my mums number

Lily laughed and picked up her phone.

James: What do you think you’re doing?

James: Dad has mentioned grandchildren now. I hope you’re really proud of yourself.

Lily: I’m drinking a milkshake right now, so I’m thrilled actually

Lily: Ask him how many grandchildren he wants

Lily pulled her milkshake closer and took a drink as she clicked on Mia’s name.

Euphemia: Thank you for your input, dear! Monty told me to let you know that James’ ears are about as red as your hair!

Lily: Thank you! That’s the outcome I was hoping for!

“Hey, smile,” She looked up and Sirius was holding his phone out in front of them. She, Sirius and Benjy were looking back at her. She smiled and he clicked a few pictures. “He’s never going anywhere I’m not invited again.”

Later that evening, she was sitting on the couch watching the second Pirates of the Caribbean movie with her mum. She had already called Mary for the second time that day and told her mum and Mary at the same time, about her and James’ current wedding plans.

And then Mary had to go and ruin all the fun they were having by asking Lily if she and James were officially dating yet.

She had hung up on her, only to be berated by her own mother.

But things had calmed down now, and they were even sharing a bowl of popcorn. Lily had even almost fully forgiven her mother.

They were about halfway through the movie when she heard some car honking the horn outside.

Lily and her mum both looked in the direction of the street, the car honked again, and then they turned back toward the tv.

And then Lily’s phone buzzed.

James: That honking is me. Come outside please

Lily looks at the message for a minute and then over at her mum. “Apparently that was James. He’s outside.”

“Well go and see what the boy wants.” Rose said, not looking away from the television, but she was smirking.

“Mum,” Lily warned, but she got up and started toward the front door without saying anything else.

James was still in his car, which was still in the road. He had the window rolled down and his elbow propped up and he waved to her when he saw her. She knew that he was trying to look cool, and it was working for him. Especially in the button down.

“What are you doing?” She asked.

“I’m here to pick you up,”

“I told you that I’m not crashing-”

“I’m picking you up for the afterparty, you were invited by Marlene and me and everyone else. The wedding is over, Nick and Violet have left for their honeymoon, Aunt Cora has gone to bed for the night. You won’t be crashing anything, but you will be very upset if you miss out. So go get dressed and then get in the car!”

Lily chewed her tongue as she thought it over. It did not take her very long to decide that he was telling the truth and that she very much wanted to go. “You better have already texted Sirius.”

“I’m doing that right now,” He pulled out his phone. “Not that I want the two of you hanging out anymore.” She smirked at his annoyed expression, which she knew was just for show, and then spun on her heel and raced back into the house.

Her mum had already turned off the movie and was watching something else. “I’m going to Marlene’s!” She called over her shoulder as she took the stairs two at a time.

“I figured,” Her mum called back.

She peeled off the sweatshirt and pajama pants that she’d put on to watch a movie with her mum and stood in front of her closet, wondering what she should wear. Everyone else was going to be in formal clothes since they had all attended the wedding, so that meant that she got to wear a dress.

She pulled her scrunchy out of her hair and started combing her fingers through the curls as she looked back and forth between a black dress, and a dark green dress. She wished she would have taken the time to dry her hair after she got out of the shower yesterday, because she had no idea what it was going to look like when she got in front of the mirror.

She chose the black dress, quickly pulling it on over her head and then slipping on a pair of strappy black wedges.

Once she was dressed, she threw herself into the bathroom and looked over her reflection. Her hair didn’t actually look half bad. She quickly pulled half of it up with an elastic, making sure there were still curls framing her face and then reached for her eyeliner and mascara.

She grabbed her jean jacket as she turned off all the lights that she’d flipped on and not five minutes after she’d started getting ready, she was finished.

“You look lovely,” Her mum said as she walked into the kitchen to grab her purse. She shoved her phone in it and smiled at her mother, who was putting the kettle on the stove.

“Thank you. I’m sorry that I’m running off in the middle of our movie.”

She waved her hand. “We’ll finish it tomorrow. Don’t worry about it. Maybe tomorrow, I can see Marlene before she leaves?”

Lily smiled. “I’ll let her know that you want a hug before she leaves.” She kissed her mum on the cheek and then she was rushing out the front door. She paused before she reached the door and turned back to her mum. “Why are you putting the kettle on?”

Rose raised her brow and hummed. “What?”

“Mum, why are you putting the kettle on?”

“I’m having tea, love. Why else would I put the kettle on?” But she had already turned away from Lily.

“Right, well, tell Mia I say hullo.” Rose started laughing and Lily walked out the door.

James looked to be facetime-ing Sirius, judging by how animated he was being. But when he saw her, he did a double take. An actual double take, and then immediately hung up the phone and threw it into the console as he opened his door.

“You weren’t even inside for ten minutes. Were you wearing that under your pajamas?” He walked up to her, looking a little dazed.

“No,” Lily did a little twirl for him. “Mary and I used to compete to see who could get ready faster whenever we went out. Also, this dress is doing most of the work.” She looked up at him and he was reaching for her hair. She laughed as he twirled a strand through his fingers. “Alright, and the hair. The hair is doing an equal amount of the work.”

He shook his head and his hand raked through his own hair. “You’re bloody gorgeous, Evans. It’s hardly fair at all.”

“Yeah, well, we already knew that.” She grinned at him and then allowed herself to take in his outfit. He’d lost his jacket, and he had his sleeves pushed up his forearms, and the top couple buttons undone.

He looked very good.

“We did know, yes, we’ve talked about it. I just can’t believe that I get to take you to a party.”

He held out his hand to her and she took it, looking over his face. He led her over to the passenger seat and opened the door for her. “Thank you,” She said, ducking into the car.

He couldn’t believe that he got to take her to a party.

Were her insides supposed to feel like they were melting? Because they did. They very much did.

She watched him jog back to the drivers side, and when he closed the door behind him, he put both his hands on the steering wheel, paused, and then turned to look at her again. “I had mapped out the entire conversation that we were going to have on the way over there.” He started the car and turned away from her to look at the road.

She laughed, “Oh?”

“Yeah, and now that’s all shot to hell because I can’t remember anything I wanted to say to you. I mean, I was definitely going to berate you for what you did earlier.”

“What did I do earlier?” She asked, turning to toss her jacket and bag into the back seat, shrinking the space between them. She gathered her hair and pulled it over her shoulder before she sat back down.

“You know what you did.”

“Your mum sent me a picture of your red ears.”

“Yes, she made me pose for her.”

Lily snorted and covered her mouth with her hand. “I love that she did that.”

He tried to glare at her, but it was lacking any bite. “Of course you do.”

“To be fair, I didn’t even think to text her-”

“Oh, I’ve already yelled at Sirius.”

“Are you yelling at me right now?”

“I’m trying.” He shook his head. “You’re very distracting though.”

“You look really good too,” She said, resting her elbow on the console and her chin on her palm. He kept glancing over at her and then back at the road. “Really, really good.”

“Dammit, Evans. I’m trying to drive.”

“Sorry,” She sat up, not feeling at all sorry. There were no other cars on the road that she had to worry about him running into. And she liked knowing that she could tease him so easily. That he was so easy to distract. Because she always felt like he could draw her attention to him without doing much of anything, to see that she had that same effect on him made her feel powerful.

They turned down a street and the McKinnon Manner came into view. It was always a bit jarring to remember that Marlene had grown up here, or that this sprawling property was only a few kilometers from her own, very humble home.

“Are all the siblings still here?”

“Marcus is here, if that’s what you’re wondering.”

Lily tilted her head. “He was one of the McKinnons I was wondering about, though there are a few more.”

“Charlie went home. Ben-”

“Hold on. Why did you say that?” Lily turned her body toward him.

He shrugged a shoulder, but he didn’t glance over at her so she started laughing. He cracked a smile and relented. “You told him that he was pretty.”

She was still laughing. “He is pretty,”

“I know, but he was flirting with you when I dropped Marlene and Dorcas off on Thursday.”

“He was not flirting-”

“Marlene got jealous too.”

“Too?” 

“Yes, Lily. I fancy you, and you were practically jumping out of the car to tell Marcus how pretty you think he is. I was a little jealous.”

“But it’s just, Marc,” Lily laughed, tucking her hair back behind her ear. “I promise not to get distracted by him tonight. And if you want, I’ll even hang out of the car to tell you how pretty you are.”

James pressed his lips together to keep his smile from getting too big, and then glanced over at her. “I appreciate the offer, but I think I’m good for now. I might cash in on a later date.”

She nodded, as though he was being perfectly reasonable. “Just let me know when you need to be bolstered.”

He turned into the driveway, which was basically a road all its own. It was lined with cars, and there were people walking back to their cars to leave for the night, so James had to drive extra slowly.

“Did Sirius ask you to get lunch with him just to give you a hard time?” His voice had lost just a bit of its playful tone.

“No,” She shook her head. “He didn’t ask me to get lunch with him at all. We just ran into each other at Hopper’s and then he dragged me off to the park to give me a hard time.”

“Oh, that’s much better.”

Lily smiled and leaned her elbow on the console again. “We had a nice time. Benjy was there too.”

“Okay, and you’re not secretly freaking out about my parents, are you?”

She laughed again, “No, James. I know that they’re just having their fun.” She didn’t think that he’d like to know that she thought his mum was on her way to have a fun little chat with her own mother. 

He nodded and then pulled off the road into an empty spot on the grass. Lily could spot the tent that was set up in the back now, glowing orange with twinkly lights and candles. She could also hear the bass from whatever song was playing.

She turned to look back at James as he turned the car off.

“Ready?” He asked, dropping the key into the cupholder.

“Do you want me to drive on the way home?” She asked.

He thought about it for a minute and then shook his head. “No, I’m good.”

“I can, though. You drove us home on Thursday, you drove everyone home on Thursday. And I don’t need to get wasted twice in three days.”

He shrugged, “Maybe.” She was still leaning on the console, and he reached out and twirled her hair in his fingers again. “Though, I don’t think I need to be drinking around you just yet. I already told you that you make me feel a bit sloshed as it is. And now you’re wearing this dress,” His eyes dropped momentarily, but then jumped back up to her face. “Well, I don’t need to make an even bigger idiot out of myself than I normally do.”

Her eyes were glued to his face.

This moment suddenly felt like the exact right time to kiss him. He was spouting off nonsense about how he made a fool of himself in front of her while he played with her hair, sending tingles down her spine.

She reached up and laced her fingers through his.

Was she allowed to kiss him? Was she allowed to do that while she was also making the claim that she didn’t want to date him?

Well, she did want to date him. She very much wanted to date him. She just didn’t think that starting something now would lead to anything sustainable and James, who had always been a fixture in her life, wasn’t someone she could date temporarily.

“You look lost in thought,” James said, rubbing his thumb down the side of her palm.

“Maybe a little bit,” She said quietly. She leaned further over the console, squeezing James’ fingers as she did.

She was supposed to be living in the moment and not overthinking things.

Was she really going to let him leave without kissing him?

No. She’d wanted to kiss this boy for most of her life.

She let go of his hand and reached out, the tips of her fingers running over the slight stubble on his jaw, through his hair and then rested her hand on the base of his neck. She saw him lick his lips and then pulled gently. He leaned in.

She let her eyes close as his lips pressed against hers, her fingers curling in his hair. Her entire body felt like it was on fire, and for a moment it was completely overwhelming. But then his hand was cupping her cheek and she felt both grounded and emboldened at the same time. She smiled against his lips, and then he was smiling as well.

“Just so we’re clear,” James said quietly, nudging his nose against hers and then pressed a quick kiss to her lips again. “I am very much aware that you just kissed me, and if you draw attention to it, I’m not going to want to stop kissing you.”

She tugged his hair, in a way that was meant to be playful retaliation for his teasing, but James’ eyes clouded over in a way that wasn’t so playful as he dropped his forehead against hers.

They had definitely waited too long to have their first kiss.

“Good,” She responded. And then she kissed him again and she could feel his restraint. “And just so we’re clear, I don’t think you’ve done anything to make yourself look like an idiot in front of me yet.”

“Yet,” He chuckled, but it was raspy and he had his eyes closed. “Give it time though, right?”

She pulled her hand from his hair and brushed her thumb over his cheek. She wanted to stay here in his car and snog him, but there were still guests from the party walking past them and she didn’t think this was the best place to put on a show. She wasn’t sure that James’ parents weren’t still here. 

“Alright,” She leaned back a few inches and sighed. “Alright,” She repeated. “Let’s get out of the car now.

“Yeah,” He nodded, “Good idea.” He opened his eyes and they were still dark. “Very good idea.”

She laughed, the tension seeping from her body.

She opened her door and stood up, fixing her hair and wondering if her lips were going to stop tingling any time soon. James jogged around the car and then he was holding his hand out to her.

“Do you want this?” He asked, his cheeky grin back in place. She smiled at him and nodded, taking his hand with the hand furthest from him and then spinning into him so his arm was around her shoulders now. “Smooth.” He laughed, leaning over and pressing a kiss to the side of her head. “Alright, let’s go and find everyone.”


	14. Chapter 14

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay. I stayed up until 3am working on this chapter last night, so I'm really hoping that you all like it. I'm still having trouble with certain types of scenes, but you never get better without doing so here we are. 
> 
> Please enjoy.

Marlene looked like a princess in her very fancy bridesmaids dress and professionally styled hair. She ran up to Lily and pulled her away from James. She smelled like vodka and lemonade and Lily laughed when she saw Mary’s face on Marlene’s phone.

“You’re making me dizzy, Marlene!” Mary called.

“Sorry!” Marlene righted her phone and turned it toward Lily and James. “Look who got here though!”

“I figured she was here when you squealed her name. I’ve spent almost five hours talking to her today though, so I’ve seen enough of her face. Though she looks significantly hotter now. Lo, James!” Mary waved and James laughed, putting his arm back around Lily’s shoulders.

“Hey, Mary! I’m sorry you’re not here.”

“Yes, well, I sort of am at the moment. And it didn’t take Marlene until two in the morning to remember I existed so,” She cocked her head to the side and clicked her tongue.

“Oh piss in a bush,” Lily clicked her own tongue and Marlene snorted.

“Good one, Lily,” Marlene elbowed her and then walked off to talk to Mary some more.

“Did you really talk to her for five hours today?”

“Yeah, s’why I didn’t respond to most of your texts before you left for the wedding.”

“I assumed it was because I was annoying you.”

“Fair guess, but no.” Lily teased, leaning into him. “Mary was helping me prep for my interview on Monday.”

“For five hours?”

Lily laughed, “Definitely not.”

Lily and James went further into the tent so she could greet everyone else. Marcus was standing with Kingsley, Remus and Peter and Lily poked James in the stomach as they started in that direction.

“Are you good? Can you handle this?”

He licked his bottom lip as he smiled, refusing to look down at her as she teased him. “Yeah, I’m good. Thanks for checking in.” He pulled her a little closer to him and she reached up to squeeze his hand.

“No problem.” She looked back toward the group and raised her brow. “And I know I said I wouldn’t tell Marc how pretty he is, but can I tell Kingsley?” She hadn’t seen him at the bar the other night since he and Peter had left before she had been able to get there. His jawline was even more impressive than she remembered from secondary.

“I mean, someone should, look at the man.”

Lily laughed and the group turned toward her and James. Marcus walked up to them first with a giant grin, showing off his near perfect, white teeth and mile deep dimples.

“Lily! I heard that James ran off to get you! Don’t know why you weren’t here all day,” James let his arm fall from her shoulder so she could give Marcus a hug. “You look absolutely wicked.”

“Thank you, Marcus! And if I had said more than a dozen words to Nicholas in my life, perhaps he would have thought to invite me. But he’s almost ten years older than we are and I was always kind of scared of him.”

Marcus laughed, “Glad I didn’t get pegged as a scary older brother.”

“Absolutely nothing about you is intimidating, Marc.” Lily shrugged and James laughed at her side.

Kingsley walked up next to Marcus and offered Lily his hand. “Sorry I missed you at the pub the other day.”

“Me too! It’s so good to see you again! And you too Peter!” Peter gave her a slight wave.

“I wanted to stay longer, but…”

“It was a Thursday?” Lily offered and he grinned.

“Exactly.”

“Still upset that you all didn’t think to invite me,” Marcus stepped back to the table and picked up his drink.

“Stop trying to pretend that my friends are your friends!” Marlene shouted from the other side of the tent, still holding Mary up in front of her.

“Sod off, Marlene!”

“Don’t listen to her, mate,” Peter patted him on the shoulder. “You are our friends.”

“Thanks, bud.” Marcus patted Peter’s hand and then finished off his drink.

“Where is Dory?” Lily asked, looking around the tent.

“She went to help Mum and Charlotte get all the pins out of their hair. And probably change. I don’t think Marlene is ever going to take her dress off, but Dorcas said she missed her joggers.” Remus offered. “Why are you being so quiet, James?”

James took a deep breath and put his arm back around Lily. “I don’t know. No reason.”

“You’re still trying to figure out the guest list, aren’t you?” Peter snickered.

“As long as we’re on it, mate,” Remus hid his mouth behind his drink and Lily laughed as she grinned back at James.

“Who told you two? His parents or Sirius?”

“What are we talking about?” Marcus raised his brow, looking back and forth between the two of them.

“Nothing.” James let his chin drop to his chest. “I’m going to go and find some drinks for us.”

“Thanks, peach.” Remus and Peter both laughed, and James glared at her halfheartedly before he walked off.

“Sirius told us, immediately.” Remus informed her.

“Well, it’s mostly his fault, so that makes sense.”

“Mostly?” Peter took a drink from his cup. “He told us that he took your phone and texted Mia pretending to be you. That sounds like it was entirely his fault.”

“Does this have to do with why Aunt Mia was asking my mum about the caterers?” Marcus asked.

“Yeah,” Peter nodded. “She’s planning James and Lily’s wedding.”

Marcus raised her brow, “Are you two…”

“No,” Remus answered for her. “Sirius just took a joke too far and now we’re here.”

Lily shrugged. She wanted to tell them that it was kind of Monty’s fault. That he and Mia had been joking about James’ wedding and that Monty had turned to her to ask for her opinion, assuming that she would be the bride, but standing in front of James’ friends, in a tent that had just housed a wedding, the implications didn’t seem as funny. It didn’t really even seem like a joke. Especially since James was no longer there to get embarrassed.

“I mean, I guess.” She shrugged, looking over her shoulder to see if James was on his way back yet. Why had his parent’s expectations about where things were headed not bothered her before? With all her overthinking, why had that never crossed her mind? Why had she not even so much as dwelled on it? James had been expecting her too, and while she knew that it was all in good fun, teasing James about the wedding, that original moment in the Potter’s kitchen, that hadn’t been a joke. Monty hadn’t turned to her with the intention of teasing her, Mia hadn’t swatted his arm because she didn’t want him to tease her.

And now Mia was at her Mum’s house probably recounting both sides of the story to one another and gushing about how James and Lily were always bound to end up together.

She took a deep breath and then James was at her side, handing her something to drink. “Do you like red wine?” He asked, and she looked down to see that that was what he had gotten her. The boys in front of her had all gone back to talking, but she had no clue what they were talking about.

She took a sip and nodded. “I’m not very picky,” She found his free hand and squeezed it as she turned toward him. “I’m sorry that I’ve spent most of the day teasing you.”

He lowered his own glass from his mouth and tilted his head toward her. “Did you just get delayed embarrassment? Because I could start teasing you now.” He smirked.

“No,” Her smile was small, but genuine. “No, I’m not embarrassed. And I’ll quickly stop feeling sorry if you try and tease me back.”

He looked over her for a moment and then took another sip of his wine. “Please don’t apologize for giving me shit about anything.”

“James,” Lily sighed.

“No, really.” He looked back at her, his eyes wide and full of mirth. “Every time you say something clever, or something you know is going to make my ears go red, you look so proud of yourself and your smile just about doubles my pulse. I like being teased by you. Perhaps especially so when you’re teasing me about the wedding that my parents are planning for us.”

And now she was pretty sure that she was blushing, and she also wanted to kiss him again. But she didn’t want to do it in front of all these people. Both because she wasn’t a fan of public displays of affection, and because things had quickly gotten a little too heated when they were back in the car.

So she squeezed his hand instead and leaned into his side.

“I’ll pretend that I don’t notice it.” James referenced her blush as he smirked, bringing his drink back up to his mouth.

“Much appreciated.” She said quietly.

“James!” They both turned around and saw Marlene walking toward them. “Mary wants to have a word with you!”

Lily raised her brow and opened her mouth to say something, but James stepped away from her and shook his head. “You had lunch with Sirius today and let him text my mother from your phone! You can’t say shit!”

Lily let her mouth fall shut and then hung her head in defeat.

James took the phone from Marlene and then walked off to talk to Lily’s best friend about who knows what.

“Why did you let her do that?” Lily turned to Marlene.

She shrugged. “Seemed like it’d be a laugh.” Then she reached out and pinched Lily’s cheeks. “Also, I wanted you all to myself.” Lily scrunched her face and reached up and grabbed Marlene’s hands.

“Well now that you’ve got me, what are you gonna do with me?”

“Honestly, you two,” Dorcas walked up wearing joggers and a McKinnon football sweatshirt. Though whether it was Marlene’s or anyone else’s was a mystery. “Just get a room. That will be far less painful for me, and everyone else involved.”

Lily laughed and pushed Marlene away so she could give Dorcas a hug. “You’re the best dressed person at this party.”

“Thanks,” Dorcas grinned, kissing Lily’s cheek. “I was hoping you’d show up in something similar.”

“I had the opportunity to wear this dress though, so I did that instead.”

“Fair.” She looked Lily up and down appreciatively.

“Come along, little muffins, there is a microphone over here. We need to serenade one another.” Marlene grabbed Dorcas and Lily by their elbows and started pulling them toward the other end of the tent, and Lily was starting to think that the boys were at the far end because the microphone and speakers were at the other.

James came back after two songs, with Sirius and Benjy. They were all laughing about something and Lily missed one of her lines in their song because she was too busy looking at James. Which Marlene noticed of course.

“Lily, you’re drooling while you’re supposed to be singing,” She said, into the microphone.

She swung her head toward Marlene, only to have her attention drawn back to James, Sirius and Benjy when Sirius whistled obnoxiously.

“Dorcas!” He shouted, “Damn girl!”

Dorcas laughed and then posed for him. “Thank you, Sirius! I know, it’s almost too much for people to handle. Marlene can’t keep her hands off me,” She continued to pose, and Marlene went back to singing.

Lily finished the song and then convinced Marlene that a bottle of water and a snack would do her some good. Dorcas thanked her, but then disappeared and came back with a beer for herself. Apparently, Lily was taking over for her.

When they made it back to the table and Marlene took a seat next to Marcus, and the two of them started going on about how grown up their baby brother was, while splitting a plate of mac n’ cheese that Lily had carried over. Lily kissed the side of Marlene’s head, which tasted like hairspray, and then went to stand with James and his mates.

“Lily!” Sirius put his arm around her. “It’s been so long. So much has happened since I last saw you.”

“Yes, I changed out of my pajamas.” She nodded, though she knew what he was referring to. She looked at James, who was grinning at her over Sirius’ shoulder. He had most definitely told Sirius that they kissed. “Just tell me that you didn’t tell Mary.”

“What are you talking about?” Sirius shook his head. “What specifically are you talking about-”

“I didn’t tell-”

“No, for real. My phone is in your car. Okay, so if you told her, before I did, she will murder me. She will decapitate me, and then carry my head around on a spike until it deteriorates and falls off. Then she will keep it in her living room and talk to me everyday, and I won’t be able to respond. I’ll just have to sit there and listen to her go on and on. So please tell me that you didn’t tell her.” Sirius had started laughing after Lily proclaimed that Mary would murder her, and James shortly after.

“I didn’t tell her.”

“Okay, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. What did you two talk about?” She narrowed her eyes and crossed her arms over her chest.

“Do I get more details about what you and Sirius talked about.” Sirius laughed and Lily threw her hands in the air.

“For fuck’s sake, should we have recorded everything?” Then she sucked on her teeth while she tried to remember what they had talked about.

“Do you not remember?” Sirius asked, raising his brow further up the longer she went on thinking. “Wow, glad I made such an impression.”

“I do.” Lily shook her head. “You told me that you’re ace,” She ticked it off on her fingers, “I told you that I was seven the first time I fancied James and then you apologized to me for being so mean-”

“I did not-”

“You did, Sirius.” Benjy cut in. “It was really moving, we all cried.”

Sirius rolled his eyes and James laughed, throwing his arm around Sirius’ shoulders. “That was might big of you, mate. I’m really proud.”

“Fuck off,” Sirius shrugged him off, “Red, I’m gonna have to start being mean to you again.”

“That’s alright, I’ll know that it’s just for show.” Lily grinned.

It felt like she blinked, and then it was three in the morning.

They started a bonfire around midnight and then they got to reminiscing about secondary, the summers since, and the time had just melted away. Lily spent a lot of time cuddling with Marlene and Dorcas. They called Mary again and she stayed on the phone until Marlene fell asleep and Dorcas decided to take her to bed.

And then Lily had spent a lot of time cuddling with James. Her legs draped over his thighs, his hand on her knee, her head tucked under his chin. Every time he laughed, she could feel the vibrations. She might have fallen asleep too if she weren’t feeling so euphoric.

James let her drive home, and she told him that she was honored that he trusted her with Edith. He laughed at her, and while she didn’t really think the few beers that he’d had were making him act any different, he did tell her that her eyes were sparkly a few times on the drive home.

She pulled into his driveway and turned the car off, quietly climbing out. James met her in front of the car and silently pulled her into a hug. It was a good hug too, his arms tight around her and her head tucked under his chin.

“Drink some water.” She said into his chest.

“Will do.” He promised, kissing the top of her head before stepping back and looking her over. “I’ll see you in a bit.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “Breakfast?”

“Lunch. You’re not gonna wake up for breakfast.”

“Fair.” He nodded. He didn’t move from in front of her, so she tilted her head to the side.

“G’night?”

He hesitated before nodding. “Yeah. Good night, Lily.”

She crept back into her house very quietly, not turning on any lights even when she got to her room. She pulled the dress off, tugged on a pair of shorts and a t-shirt and then collapsed on her bed, completely content. She wasn’t even going to wash her face. She was ready to just fall asleep on top of her blankets.

She heard her phone buzz from within her purse on the desk, and if she wasn’t completely sure that it was James, she wouldn’t have found the strength to get up again.

She glanced toward his window as she pulled her phone out of her purse, but his light wasn’t on either. She crawled back into bed and got under the covers before she clicked on the screen.

James: I have a question for you and I know how it sounds, but I have to ask you or I won’t be able to fall asleep.

James: Just remember that I haven’t had nothing to drink

James: Did you mean to kiss me earlier?

Lily stared at the screen for a moment, wondering if she was so tired that she was reading it wrong. She read it a few more times, but the words didn’t rearrange themselves. Was that why he had hesitated when they were saying goodnight? Had he been waiting for her to kiss him again?

Lily: What is the alternative?

James: I know, I know. But was it an accident?

Lily: I’m actually glad you brought this up, because yes, it was an accident. I was falling and your lips were the only thing I could think to catch myself on

Lily: I meant to kiss you. I kissed you on purpose.

James: Good

James: I really want to kiss you again.

Lily bit hard on her lip and felt like her chest might just explode.

Lily: Same.

She watched the three little dots appear and then disappear. She turned her screen off and then shoved her phone under her pillow.

James really was something else.

She closed her eyes, snuggling further into her blankets.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

If he was throwing rocks at her window right now, she might murder him.

She pulled her phone back out.

Lily: James, if you make me get out of bed again, I’m going to throw my feet at you. Because they will fall off. And then I will throw them at you.

Tap. Tap. Tap.

She huffed and threw her blankets back, swinging her sore legs and feet around and standing up for a second time. She nearly jumped out of her skin when she saw James was sitting on the small bit of roof under her window, his hand raised to tap against her window again.

She ran a hand through her hair and then walked over and pulled the window open. He was wearing a shit-eating grin.

“What in god’s name are you doing?” He was still in his dress clothes. She hadn’t seen him go into his house, perhaps he hadn’t yet.

“I told you, I want to kiss you again.” Like it was obvious why he was here. Perhaps it was, but Lily’s brain was very tired and James was very distracting.

“It’s nearing four in the morning,” She reminded him, though she didn’t know why, because she also wanted to kiss him. She should have kissed him after they’d pulled back into his driveway.

Also how many times had she had this exact fantasy? James climbing up through her window. Specifically James and specifically this window.

“Is this an inconvenient time? Are you busy?” He asked, pushing his glasses up his nose, his grin not faltering in the slightest.

She had a hard time keeping her frown in place. “Kissing you earlier might have been a mistake, but shoving you off this roof won’t be.”

He tutted at her, “Can I come in?”

She pursed her lips and bit the tip of her tongue. “Well, yeah.” She stepped aside and his smile got bigger as he slipped inside. He closed the window behind him and then spun around to face her, his head tilted down.

“You’ve already changed.”

“I was already in bed and half asleep,” She added, stretching her fingers out and then curling them into fists. She thought that she should have felt self-conscious under his gaze, but she didn’t. He was looking at her now with the same intensity that he’d been looking at her when she was wearing the dress. Her voice was quieter when she said, “I see you haven’t changed.”

“We just got back like five minutes ago.”

Lily shrugged. “Maybe.” Perhaps he was right, but it didn’t matter for once. They were speaking only to fill the silence, to help navigate this new place they were in. Lily remembered the feeling of his lips on her and her stomach tightened in anticipation.

He stepped closer to her, reaching out, cupping her face in his hands and adrenaline sparked through her body. She took a deep breath, filling her lungs as his chest pressed against hers.

He paused before her, his mouth inches from her own and his eyes boring into hers. His smile had slide from his face, making way for the much more serious expression that he wore now. She was sure that her own expression was similar. There were too many feelings building up between them, there was too much history, too much wanting.

Lily’s gaze darted back and forth, from one of his eyes to the others, mesmerized by the gold flakes, lost in the brown starbursts, overwhelmed by everything she saw looking back at her.

This was James. The boy-next-door. And he was here, in her room, holding her face and looking at her like she was the only thing that mattered in that moment.

Her heart leapt and she pushed up on her tiptoes, erasing all space that had been left between them. In the car, the console had been in the way, but there was nothing in the way now. And when her lips pressed against his it was both a sigh of relief and the start of an avalanche. She felt the thrumming start in her chest, building its way out to her fingertips as her hands slowly slid up his chest and around his neck.

One of James’ hands stayed on her face, holding her gently but firmly as his lips started moving in tandem with hers. His other hand slid down her bare arm and then to the small of her back, pulling her closer.

They quickly became a tangle of heavy breathing and eager limbs.

James spun them around and pressed her against the wall beside her window, his hands moving to her hips and then under her shirt.

When his mouth was on her neck, her fingers found the buttons of his dress shirt and deftly moved over them until she could push the shirt from his shoulders. His undershirt wasn’t as thick or stiff, but she still slipped her hand in his collar to grip his shoulder when he nipped at her pulse point.

She wrapped her fingers in his hair and pulled his mouth back to hers. Every new angle, every push or pull that he responded to, every rushed breath that she caught, made her pulse thrum louder in her ear. _Finally,_ her heart was singing. _What took so long._

He kissed her hard, his grip on her hips tightening before he pulled his mouth from hers, leaving their foreheads pressed together.

It took a few moments before she could open her eyes, and when she managed, she found that his eyes were still closed. She trailed her finger along the edge of his jaw, her brain a puddle of uselessness. She couldn’t think of a single thing to say.

It was a few more moments before James’ eyes opened and found hers. His voice sounded only slightly unsteady as he said, “Well, that wasn’t an accident.”

The corner of her mouth tugged up, but words still eluded her.

“I should probably go back to mine.” He didn’t make to move from her. His hands on her hips were on her bare skin, tucked under her shirt and pushing down the waistband of her shorts just a bit. When his thumb brushed her side, it sent a whole different kind of goosebumps than it had when he’d been kissing her. “Let you get some sleep.” She couldn’t make sense of what he was trying to tell her, not when his thumb was still brushing against her skin.

He pulled his forehead away from hers and made to take a step back, but Lily stepped forward with him, her hand going around his neck and pulling her back to her.

She pressed light kisses to his lips now, and then she moved to his cheek and his chin before falling back to the heels of her feet and looking at.

“You can stay.” She said quietly, her smile small and slightly unsure. James was inspecting her face again and so she combed her fingers through his hair. “Please stay. I don’t snore.”

His smile was quick to follow the request and when he stepped away from her this time, it was toward her bed and she didn’t try to stop him. “Of course, I’ll stay.” He said, taking a seat on the edge of her bed. He bent over and unlaced his shoes and Lily watched him toe out of them.

She got onto the bed next to him and pulled the covers back, sliding underneath. He stood up and she scooted over to make room for him.

They were quickly wrapped back up in one another, and Lily relaxed with her ear pressed to his chest, listening to his heartbeat, and feeling the rise and fall of his chest against her own.

No. This wasn’t something temporary. This was James and she wanted as much of him as she could get.

“Good night, Lily.” He whispered, his lips brushing her forehead.

“Good night, peach.” He let out a huff of quiet laughter and pulled her closer.


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy Sunday everyone! I'm really glad that I thought to look over this chapter last night, bc I got the second dose of the covid vaccine and it hit me like a truck! I'm starting to feel better now, but my brain is still mush
> 
> So please enjoy this chapter, it's nothing but fluff

When Lily woke the next morning, or perhaps it was closer to noon, it was to a pleasant sensation on her head. Someone was playing with her hair.

James lightly scratched at her scalp and she hummed, blindly lifting her hand until she felt his hand wrap around hers. And just like the first time he’d held her hand, his hand was warm and seemed to fit perfectly around hers.

“Morning,” He said, his voice quiet and rough. She hummed again. “I’ve been trying to decide the best way to get back into my house from here. I’m one hundred and fifty percent sure that my parents know that I never came in last night, but I’d still like to try not getting caught, if only because it’s more fun that way.”

Lily took a deep breath and tilted her head so she could look up at him. She blinked a few times before she was able to keep her eyes open. “Why did you stop playing with my hair?”

He smiled at her and his hand moved back to her hair. “So, you’re still unbothered.”

“No. Maybe. But I don’t want to worry about it right now. I’ll be properly cowed when I next see your mum. Probably. It’s a good thing we’re adults now and no one can ground us. Though, I can probably still get in trouble for having a boy in my room,” She looked toward the door. “What time is it?”

“Almost eleven.”

“Almost?” Lily groaned. She did the math in her head and then shut her eyes and snuggled closer to James. “That’s not enough sleep.”

“No, it’s not.” He agreed, his fingers moving soothingly through her hair. She was quite sure that she would be able to fall back to sleep rather quickly if he kept that up. “I promise not to keep you up so late tonight though.”

She snorted, eyes still closed. “You couldn’t if you tried. I’m already tired.”

He chuckled and she smiled as she felt the vibrations in his chest.

It should have been weird to wake up in his arms. It should have been at least a little weird.

Lots of things _should_ have been weird though, and they just weren’t. _Of course_ this is what was happening. _Of course_ she joked with his friends about his parents planning their wedding. _Of course_ she had seen him every day for a week now without making plans to do so in advance _. Of course_ he’d climbed in through her window last night. _Of course_ Sirius had sat her down and told her to be nice to James. _Of course_ no one at the party had thought it surprising at all that James and Lily had shown up together. _Of course, of course, of course_.

She squeezed his hand.

“Hey, Lils?”

She hummed again.

“Can I take you out on a date? A real date?”

Her eyes popped open.

Lily bit down on her tongue, waiting for the familiar tug of resistance, waiting for her brain to start spinning around in circles to remind her of all the reasons she should say no.

It didn’t come though, and all she wanted to do was tease him.

“A real date? You mean I let you spend the night and we haven’t even gone on one real date yet?” He laughed and she pinched his side, “Do you want my mum to come in here?” Lily was pretty sure that her mum had left the house around eight or nine to go have brunch with her mum like she did most Sundays. Lily would have gone with her if she hadn’t gotten home after three in the morning.

“You know that we haven’t.”

“You gave me a flower before we went to the diner.”

“Yes, but you said that it wasn’t a date. You said that we were ‘hanging out.’”

“Seemed like a date.”

“Lily,” He pulled her tighter against his chest, dropping her hand to wrap both arms around her. If he was trying to cuddle her into submission, that would have worked even if she hadn’t already decided that she wanted to go on a real date with him. “I want to take you on a real date, a date where you are willing to call it a date from the start,” He rolled onto his side and scooted down so that they were face to face. Lily reached up and brushed the hair back from his face. “You like me, and I like you. That can be enough if we let it.”

She wanted it to be enough. “I do like you.” Her thumb brushed over his cheek and then she pushed her hand into his hair. She’d almost always liked him when she was a kid. Even when she didn’t want to admit to herself that she liked him, she’d liked him. “A lot,” She added quietly.

He nudged his nose against hers, smiling widely. “Go out with me, Evans.”

He was smiling, but there was something unsure in his eyes. She twisted her fingers in his hair and then leaned in, pressing her lips to his. It was a short and sweet thing, and it sent tingles all the way to her toes. “Alright, Potter.” And then he was smiling under her lips and tightening his arms around her again.

He pulled back, keeping their foreheads together. “Yeah?”

“Yeah. I feel like saying no at this point would be ridiculous. I do want to go out with you. I’m still not sure it’s a good idea, but I guess we’ll just have to find out.”

“I love how much faith you have in us.”

“It’s been a week.” She laughed. “I’m sure time will help.”

“As long as you’re willing to give me time.”

She sighed and shimmied closer so she was snug against his chest again, his chin resting on top of her head. “You wanna go and get something to eat?”

“Sure. It’s a date.”

“Is it?” She asked, slowly disentangling herself from him and sitting up. She stretched her arms over her head and then worked her fingers through her curls, pulling her hair up into a plait.

James sat up as well. “I mean, no. No, I’m going to plan out our first date, and it’s going to be a lot better than grabbing lunch from… Hoppers?”

“Sure.” She looked over at him and laughed. His hair was messier than usual, he had lost his dress shirt, but he was still in his undershirt. He’d shoved his glasses on his face already and he looked absolutely perfect.

“What?”

“It’s still very strange to see you in my room. And now you’re on my bed too,” She laughed again. “It’s weird. A good weird.” She promised. 

“And in front of the poster too,” He teased, nodding toward the NSYNC poster. “Do you think it’s jealous?”

Lily rolled her eyes and pushed herself out of bed. “I’m going to make you go out the way you came in if you don’t stop.”

That evening, Lily and her mum curled up on the couch with take away to watch Stardust, taking a break from the other pirates. James had gone to some local sporting event with Remus and Sirius, she’d been invited by James, but she told him that she’d already had plans to not crash his friend date. He’d rolled his eyes but didn’t argue the point.

She’d called Mary and tried to bribe her into telling her what she’d said to James, but she refused, which only made Lily want to know more. She still told Mary everything that had happened with James since last night anyway, even though she’d said she wouldn’t if Mary didn’t give up her secrets.

She’d also told her mother everything, because she really didn’t know how to keep anything to herself.

“You had a boy spend the night?” Rose raised her brow, staring at Lily. For a minute, Lily thought that her mum was going to reprimand her, but then she just started laughing and Lily crossed her arms, turning her attention back to the movie.

“I do not appreciate you laughing at me.”

“I’m not laughing at you, darling,” Rose leaned toward Lily and put a hand on her knee. “I’m not, it’s just- did he really climb up on the roof?”

“Yes,” Lily narrowed her eyes. Rose started laughing again, and Lily didn’t feel so bad now because she figured her mum was laughing at James, which was fair. She cracked a smile. “I used to imagine him climbing in through my window. He waited until he was twenty two,” Rose’s laughter renewed.

“Well, I’m glad you finally got to snog him,”

“Me too,” Lily picked up her wine glass and tipped it toward her mum.

“Was it worth the wait and all the theatrics?”

“Yes,” Lily answered too quickly and her mum started laughing again. This time Lily joined her.

When they finally stopped laughing, her mum smoothed out her hair and shook her head. “So, what is your plan for tomorrow?”

“To go kick ass at the interview.” Lily deadpanned. Rose quirked a brow. “I’m going to drive up there around noon, maybe closer to one, the interview isn’t until two thirty, but I don’t want to be late. James offered to drive me, but I’m gonna go by myself.”

Rose nodded. “Do you need to get any new clothes?”

“No, I’ve got fancy grown up clothes from when I did my internship.” Lily grinned. “Also it’s literally the day before the interview, I hope I don’t need anything.”

Rose grinned, “Alright, I was just going to tell you that you can look through my closet.”

“Well if you’re offering, I might steal that blue blazer you have. I love that blazer.”

“You’re more than welcome to it.”

They went back to watching the movie for a few minutes.

“He asked me out.” Rose looked back at her. “Like, he asked me if he could take me on a real date.”

“Instead of the two of you just hanging out.” Lily rolled her eyes, wishing that she’d never asked James to say ‘hanging out.’

“Yes, instead of that.”

“What did you say?”

“I said yes, of course. I mean, I gave him a hard time, but I said yes.”

“And how do you feel about that?”

Lily chewed on her lip, looking back at the tv. “Not as anxious as I thought I’d be. He’s leaving on Friday though.”

“Where will he be?”

“I don’t know. Guess it depends on which team he picks. He says he’ll be about an hour away.”

“That’s not very far,” Rose shrugged.

“I mean, it’s decently far.” Lily shrugged. “And he’s going to have a new schedule to figure out. And I will too, especially if I get this job.”

“Sure,” Rose nodded. “But you want to keep seeing him after he moves?”

Lily huffed and let her head fall back against the sofa. “I’ve seen him every day for a week. I don’t know how I’m going to go back to not seeing him every day now. How whipped do I sound?”

When she looked at her mum, she was smiling at her. “Where are you going on your date?” She ignored Lily’s question.

“I don’t know. He told me that he’d let me know after he figured it out. He told me to keep Tuesday night open though, so I’m assuming that’s when it is.”

“He’s gonna spoil you, flower.”

She squirmed, pulled her feet under her and shoving her hands into her lap. “Hopefully not too much.”

Lily laid her outfit for her interview out on her desk and looked it over. She’d already tried it on, so she knew it looked good. She was glad her mum had offered the blazer.

She heard her phone buzz.

James Potter: Open your window please

She turned toward her window where she’d pulled the curtains closed while she was trying on clothes.

She put her phone down and walked over, sliding the curtains over and spotting James sitting on his windowsill, the window open. She pushed hers open as well.

“Yes?” She grinned at him.

“Mary texted me a few times this evening. Thought you’d want to know.”

She nodded, “I knew she would. Are you canceling our date then? She’s scared you off?” He laughed. “I’m not gonna tell her to stop,” Lily went on, leaning against her window sill. “I’m not technically allowed. Apparently I signed a friendship contract.”

“She has not scared me away.” He pushed his glasses up his nose. “I think I picked a team.”

Lily raised her brow. “Yeah? How did you manage that?”

He looked at her, quiet for a moment. Then he shrugged and looked away, his hand going to his hair, “I don’t know how it happened and if you make me think about it, I might change my mind.”

She didn’t believe him, he had a reason, and he didn’t want to tell her. “Alright. Who are you gonna play for then?”

“Since you’ve proven yourself to be good at keeping only this specific secret,” He looked at her over the tops of his glasses and she couldn’t stop the wide grin that spread over her face, “I’m gonna wear red. The Falcons.”

“Oh good,” Lily crossed her arms over her chest. “You look really good in red.”

“That was the deciding vote. The Canons gold is too yellow, clashes with my skin tone.”

She’d seen him in a Canons jersey before and she knew that was false, but she nodded. “I think you made the right call.”

“Me too,” His smile was softer now. He still wasn’t telling her something, but maybe he couldn’t. He wasn’t supposed to tell her which team he was going to play for until he signed a contract either, but he would tell her when he could.

“Did you have fun tonight?”

“Yeah.” He nodded. “I still wish you would have come though.”

She reached up a hand to cover her smile. “Of course,”

“Are you ready for your interview tomorrow?”

“I am. I’m a little nervous, but mainly excited.”

“Good. You’ll do brilliantly.”

“Probably,” Lily grinned.

“Are you driving tomorrow?”

“I don’t know. I’m thinking about taking the train. Actually, I probably am going to take the train. Takes the same amount of time and I don’t have to drive.”

“I could drive you.”

“You’ve already offered.” She reminded him. “But I’m good. I don’t think anyone normally brings a bloke along when they’re going in for a job interview.”

“Probably not, but we could start celebrating a lot sooner if I came with you.”

She shook her head. “Tempting, but I’m good to go on my own.”

“Alright,” He was grinning at her, that boyish grin of his that made her cheeks flush, that made her feel foolish for how much she liked him. “So I should just let you get some sleep then?”

She bit down on her lip and tilted her head, so it was leaning against the windowsill. “I mean, you should, yes.”

His grin got a little bigger, but he waited for her to go on.

“Will you meet me in the backya-”

“Yes.” He winked at her before he pulled his window shut.

Her heart danced happily in her chest as she reached out to pull her own window closed.

Lily arrived in the backyard ready to be met with cheeky remarks and some light teasing. But James didn’t have anything to say as he crossed the yard and pulled her in for a kiss that might have suggested that they had gone a lot longer than half a day without seeing one another.

Not that Lily minded at all, especially not when his hands were cupping her face like they were.

Her body quickly molded against his, and she wrapped her arms around his neck pulling him closer. Her body seemed to know what to do, as if yesterday hadn’t been the first time that she’d kissed him, but her mind was on fire with all the different sensations that it was trying to process.

She’d snogged other people before, but kissing James was different. Kissing James made her feel as though she’d never actually been kissed before.

Whatever she’d done before, it didn’t feel like this. This was what a kiss was meant to feel like, these were the feelings that people dreamed of, that they fought for. Everything before had been a colorless imitation.

And she was greedy for it. Her hands buried in his hair and she tugged, keeping him as close to her as she could. His hands left searing trails across her skin as his hands slipped under her t-shirt. He gripped her hips, his fingernails sparking an explosion of goosebumps. He nipped at her lip and trailed kisses down her jawline until he was at her neck. She gasped in surprise when she felt his teeth graze sensitive skin. Her grip on his hair tightened and he moaned against her neck.

When she was out of breath and felt as though she was moments away from drowning, she pulled back and sucked in a shaky breath, her eyes still closed. She slowly disentangled her fingers from his hair and slid her hands down to grip his shoulders.

She could feel his heart thudding against her chest.

He let out a ragged breath. “That was a bit more than a goodnight kiss,”

“Is that what you were going for?” She asked quietly, nudging his nose with her own.

“That was the original plan.”

“Maybe you should try again tomorrow.”

He laughed, “I appreciate that you’re willing to give me a second chance.”

“Of course. I’m nothing if not understanding.”

She opened her eyes to find James’ hazel eyes, bright and warm, looking right back at her. “Goodnight, Lily.” He leaned down to kiss her again, but this time his lips were soft and gentle. She let out a small, contented sigh when he pulled away.

“Goodnight, James.”


End file.
